he was 14...and meant so much to me.. my friend...24 hour companion and litterly the light of my life...he held the light at the end of the tunnel for me...
I was sick for years and lay on myy couch with him...at that time he was well and never complained to be taken out or played with he just layed there with me..(most of the time snoring) he was a comfort...a comfort to my grueling looooong days and there late at night when I couldn't sleep.
this past year I have been doing somewhat better but his health was declining...lost stregnth in his back legs...we got him a cart... he struggled with that.. but he kept going....
over the summer I knew it was time to let him go....he had started to be in pain...and caring for him was a 24hour thing...he was suffering...
while I was doing stuff around the house one day..he was on the couch watching me go back and forth..in and out..
then it hit me... I stopped and sat with him...I knew he didn't feel good.. ....I was up and about and he was on the couch....he was always there for me and with me on the couch...
when I sat down next to him he started to lick my hand..like thanking me...
I knew letting him go would be hard...I never thought it would be this hard.... being home with him day in and day out ..being sick...we had a very special bond...
he was such a blessing.. I miss him so much....
it was a loooooooooong summer knowing that we would have to let him go... many times I would say to him..nope you are not leaving me yet...
two days before we let him go I sat on the couch with him and I told him that it was ok..he could go..I would be ok....
well I thought I would... I'll keep going..fighting.. struggling.. but for now my heart is broken.. I will miss him.
thanks for listening....... mtree
-------------------- worrying about tomorrow takes its strength away from today Posts: 970 | From Point PLeasant , NJ | Registered: Jan 2008
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joalo
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 12752
posted
-------------------- Sick since January 1985. Misdiagnosed for 20 years. Tested CDC positive October 2005. Treating since April 2006. Posts: 3228 | From Somewhere west of the Mississippi | Registered: Aug 2007
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I miss my kitty too. I took care of her when she was sick and never was able to regain her ablity to eat or drink, finally had to put her to sleep.
It was so hard to do but I was physically and mentally suffering with the stress of it all.
It was a couple months ago and still miss her terribly.
Hugs
-------------------- Bart Henslea 1976 Fibro/CFS/arthritis 2004 Lyme diagnosed 2007 3 1/2 years treatment with oral combos, Cowden, IV roc. BW herbs. Off all abx in 12/10. Feeling good. Posts: 647 | From NY | Registered: Dec 2007
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aklnwlf
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 5960
posted
From one dog lover to another.....
-------------------- Do not take this as medical advice. This comment is based on opinion and personal experience only.
Alaska Lone Wolf Posts: 6147 | From Columbus, GA | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
You post brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry for the loss of your loved furry family member. Sending you a gentle hug......
Posts: 624 | From Oklahoma | Registered: Jun 2010
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feelfit
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 12770
posted
oh my gosh mtree....big hugs to you. I'm sitting here crying because i know exactly how you feel. When you love a pet as one would love their child.....
well, letting go IS equally as difficult. Your story has touched my heart in a big way....remember the good times, the unconditional love and loyalty..remember especially the companionship...
Thinking of you, Feelfit
Posts: 3975 | From usa | Registered: Aug 2007
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17hens
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 23747
posted
So, so sorry for your hurting heart. Hugs to you.
-------------------- "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalms 73:26
bit 4/09, diagnosed 1/10 Posts: 3043 | From PA | Registered: Dec 2009
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posted
I'm so sorry for your loss. My dogs are the light of my life too, honestly on some days my only reason for going on. I'm glad that you had many wonderful years together. I feel he will always be with you.
Take care
Posts: 857 | From northern california | Registered: Dec 2009
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lymeinhell
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 4622
posted
I'm so sorry for your loss. Please know that you are not alone.
It's like losing a part of yourself and also saying goodbye to a special time of your life - that part of your life you shared with that pet.
I lost my 14 yr old dog in April (after she survived a ruptured gall bladder, and a brain tumor), a 10 yrd cat the year before to cancer, and a 10 yr old cat the yr before that to lyme induced kidney failure.
And you know what? Despite saying 'Never again, never again', in the interim have brought home 2 new rescued kittens, and in July a new puppy.
Pet lovers are special people.
The love in our hearts for animals is endless and selfless, and despite the pain we know we will feel when we inevitably part, we do it to ourselves yet again and again.
Because just when you aren't looking, you'll look into a set of soulful brown or blue eyes and find that special new someone that overfills your heart with joy.
So don't be sad. Be happy for all the special time you had together, and know that someday, somewhere, a glimpse of your lost soulmate may find you when you least expect it.
-------------------- Julie _ _ ___ _ _ lymeinhell
Blessed are those who expect nothing, for they shall not be disappointed. Posts: 2258 | From a better place than I was 11 yrs ago | Registered: Sep 2003
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BoxerMom
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 25251
posted
He is in dog heaven, running at light speed, chasing squirrels.
posted
I am so sorry to hear that - just remember that you made your dog's life the best it could be and you were both so lucky to be unconditionally loved! I know though how hard it is to miss someone who was such an important companion.
I have a dog who is almost 14 and she is having a harder and harder time lately. She has been completely blind for three years (happened suddenly due to increased eye pressure from an infection)but she did really well for a long with the blindness and could do just about everything, but now that her memory is going she keeps bumping into things, and her hind legs are going and I have to help her up, so I appreciate what you went through, watching your dog fail. I hope it helps to remember the joy you brought to each other, but I know its really, really hard.
Posts: 34 | From Saratoga Springs, NY | Registered: Jun 2008
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posted
You loved your dog with all your heart. That is all he could ask for. What a sad thing.
We had to put our 15yr old border collie down 21 yrs ago and I still miss him terribly. I guess it never really goes away.
I know the bond was even stronger since your dog laid by your side for so long. I had a friend who had her border collie by her side thru cancer. It was a great loss for her when he died.
By the time I went through Lyme treatment my dog was long gone. So maybe you can just cherish the time you had to be so close.
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96222 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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dmc
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 5102
posted
ahhh, mtree, I am so sad to hear of your loss.
Time doesn't truly heal but in time you just get used to him not being there.
My thoughts are with you.
"Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again.
The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together.... "
Author unknown... Posts: 2675 | From ct, usa | Registered: Jan 2004
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kidsgotlyme
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 23691
posted
mtree I am so sorry for your loss. I understand completely how you feel.
-------------------- symptoms since 1993 that I can remember. 9/2018 diagnosed with Borellia, Babesia Duncani, and Bartonella Hensalae thru DNA Connections. Posts: 1470 | From Tennessee | Registered: Dec 2009
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linky123
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 19974
posted
So sorry for your loss. We are also in love with our two dogs. I think they love us more than they love themselves.
My dad was a dog lover. He especially loved an Irish Setter we had. He finally had to have her put to sleep b/c of hip displasia (SP)?
He lived through the Depression, fought in northern Europe in WWII, nearly froze to death at Bastogne, lost his dad during his teen years, basically lots of hard times in his life.
He said putting that dog to sleep was the hardest thing he ever had to do.
We grew up being dog lovers, mostly because of my dad. I feel your pain.
It gets better with time. Then when you are ready, maybe another dog could help fill the void.
We got ours from the pound. There are so many that need homes. It's like they know we saved them; I know that sounds corny, but I think they know.
-------------------- 'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28 Posts: 2607 | From Hooterville | Registered: Apr 2009
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posted
I'm sorry to read about your loss. I can't imagine and I try not to think about what I will do when that time comes for my little guy. It really does make a difference when you are sick and they have been by your side the entire time. He will always live on in your heart. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there.
Posts: 146 | From Midwest | Registered: Feb 2005
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sizzled
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 1357
posted
I am so sorry for your loss.
I know of the space they leave in our hearts after they leave...
He sounds like he loved you dearly and was lucky to share his life with you. He is in a place without pain and can joyously await your return...
I take that from reading the "Rainbow Bridge"...a poem about pets who have crossed over but await the day they can reunite with their loved ones...
I too have to let go of my best friend. Making the decision to do so is the hardest thing I have ever had to do but I do it with great love.
I thank my beloved animals for sharing their lives with me...
May time heal your sorrow and memories of all good times embrace you.
posted
Oh how sorry I am to read this. I know how special pets can be! Mine is losing his battle with, what looks like, cancer. It hurts to watch his life be taken like this.
We used to go on hikes and walks together. We've both been laying around for several months. I haven't been able to go out with him since the beginning of the year, and it hurts. I feel a companionship with him since we're both going through life altering diseases.
I know how it feels. I'm so sorry.
HUGS!
Posts: 256 | From Texas | Registered: Jun 2010
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posted
my precious siamese died this summer...so hard to let go I know...
but we know in our deepest heart they are grateful when say "you can go"...especially so when they have been so taking care of our hearts. It is our last act of love for them.
I am sorry for your loss.
I pray you find the comfort in that the love shared is eternal.
-------------------- Not everything in life that can be counted counts and not every thing that counts can be counted...Albert Einstein Posts: 208 | From Northeast | Registered: Aug 2010
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posted
"Time doesn't truly heal but in time you just get used to him not being there." so true dmc.
thank you ALL for your heartwarming support. you ALL said some really nice, very thoughtful, very caring and very helpful things...and I soooooooo apprectiate it.
It's nice to know others know the depth of this loss for me. he was such a part of my everyday...(and night)...
he was such a comfort.
so glad I posted this..it has really helped reading all of your replies.
thank you, mtree
-------------------- worrying about tomorrow takes its strength away from today Posts: 970 | From Point PLeasant , NJ | Registered: Jan 2008
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kam
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 3410
posted
MTree...writing through tears. CAn't imagine loosing a 24/7 4 legged friend/companion.
Ouch.
Posts: 15927 | From Became too sick to work or do household chores in 2001. | Registered: Dec 2002
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