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» LymeNet Flash » Questions and Discussion » General Support » The Top Ten Signs you have become a Chronic Lymetard

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Author Topic: The Top Ten Signs you have become a Chronic Lymetard
Tracy9
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The Top Ten Signs You have become a Chronic Lymetard:

1. You wake up one day and realize that all of your friends and family have run for the hills; and left no forwarding address.

2. Your mail has taken over the entire kitchen table, dining room table, and the boxes of mail and other paperwork type things to be dealt with (such as taxes, insurance policies, etc) have rendered several doorways and entrances bona fide fire hazards.

3. Your kids think grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup are a special homecooked meal.

4. Your telephone sounds like one long, continuous ring consisting of bill collecters. Most members of the household appear to have developed tone deafness to it, and no one in the house ever makes a move to answer it anymore.

5. You thank God long hair for boys seems to be in style, since you haven't been able to pull it together enough to get your son a haircut in nearly a year.

6. Your memory seems to be on vacation. You can't find your car keys, wallet, pocketbook, children, ATM card or checkbook. By the time you have been looking for a while, you either completely forgot what you were looking for or are too exhausted to care.

7. You are one with your bed.

8. Watching Jay Leno is the start of your evening, and if you are lucky you wake up in time for Oprah.

9. You need to rent a storage unit for your bottles of pills and supplements.

10. Your social life consists of partying down each night on Lyme Chat.

--------------------
NO PM; CONTACT: [email protected]

13 years Lyme & Co.; Small Fiber Neuropathy; Myasthenia Gravis, Adrenal Insufficiency. On chemo for 2 1/2 years as experimental treatment for MG.

Posts: 4480 | From Northeastern Connecticut | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Keebler
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-

I'd rather be a Lyme TART !

-

Posts: 48021 | From Tree House | Registered: Jul 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lymednva
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Keebler said:

quote:
I'd rather be a Lyme TART !

[lol] [lol] Me too!

Otherwise I'm in total agreement with Tracy.

Sad, but true! [shake]

--------------------
Lymednva

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painted turtle
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1. You say hi to the same people you saw 10 minutes ago as if it's the first time you've seen them that day. You do this all day.

2. You say hi to people you think look familiar but who don't know you and they ask, "do you know me?"

3. You think your dream life is reality and your waking life is a dream.

4. Life is like living in a Dali painting.

5. You don't remember who you are.

6. You know more than most doctors (about lyme).

7. You bring your coffee to the bathroom sink for a refill and put your toothbrush in the fridge.

8. Pain is like breath. Always there. (unless you also have babesia, then pain is like not having breath)

9. You fear you're really just insane and lyme may indeed be a myth.

10. You can spend days staring into space and in fact have become quite a professional at this.

--------------------
www.lymefire.blogspot.com

Posts: 855 | From United States of Mind | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
hcconn22
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LMAO at numbers 8 and 10! Great job!

--------------------
Positive 10 bands WB IGG & IGM
+ Babesia + Bartonolla and NOW RMSF 3/5/09 all at Quest

And still positive ELISA and WB two years after IV treatment
http://www.lymefriends.org/profile/blake

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Lymetoo
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Great lists, Tracy and painted!! [lol] [Big Grin]

--------------------
--Lymetutu--
Opinions, not medical advice!

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cantgiveupyet
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great lists,

I have mounds of paperwork all over the place, i put it in bags then forget where they are.

Also have the collection agencies calling, tip, never give out your cell phone to any dr office or anyone other then friends and family.

--------------------
"Say it straight simple and with a smile."

"Thus the task is, not so much to see what no one has seen yet,
But to think what nobody has thought yet, About what everybody sees."

-Schopenhauer

pos babs, bart, igenex WB igm/igg

Posts: 3156 | From Lyme limbo | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
bettyg
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cant good last tip!!


ladies good lists; i related to most of these! [Frown]

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hshbmom
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You run around your home shouting....


"Lyme Tards Unite!"


...and no one bats an eye.

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randibear
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it's when you go to bed before 8 and sleep until noon the next day!!!

--------------------
do not look back when the only course is forward

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Larkspur
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Missing items usually appear in the fridge

Missing items from the fridge usually appear in a cabinet

There are about 5-8 half finished books lying around at all times

--------------------
"We must be willing to get rid of
the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us" - e.m. forster

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bettyg
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...

well, i'm going to try writing 1 of my short poems on this one; have no idea where i'm going with this one!


They say I'm a CHRONIC LYME TARD!
and by watching my actions; that's not hard;
especially when I'm working outside in my yard!
I get so bored and have to be on guard
so my fanny doesn't become like squishy LARD!

an original by Betty G


see, I warned you all; I didn't know what and where I was going with this one but used every word I could think of to rhyme with it! [lol] [Big Grin]

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1rosepedal
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I'm a lymetard too.

I've been so busy trying to put a name with what I feel like. I haven't been able to because my brain took off on vacation without me.

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lymeladyinNY
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Still don't like the use of "tard". Call me a party pooper.

--------------------
I want to be free

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Meg
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Guilty of a lot of those on the lists, hope it's not really chronic!%^& [bonk]

--------------------
Success Stories---Treatment Guidelines

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C.M.L
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I don't think I am a lymetard,

yet I am not too far,

Now, again, I am on antibiotics,

this time, no bullseye from a tick,

my doctor thinks I am crazy,

I feel wicked lazy,

and still feel kinda sick.

200 mg a day,

thank goodness insurance can pay,

I wonder if my brain will every clear,

hoping the end is near,

My kids wonder why,

they never see me cry,

it is when i go to bed,

all the thoughts run through my head,

not making any sense,

my brain matter is getting dense.

Because during the day I pray,

for a doctor to save the day,

to cure this aweful disease,

to relieve the pain in my knees.


One day I will feel myself,

until then, i will take supplements off a shelf.

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hcconn22
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And the #1 top reason you know your a LYME TARD.

LYMENET is always on your computer.

--------------------
Positive 10 bands WB IGG & IGM
+ Babesia + Bartonolla and NOW RMSF 3/5/09 all at Quest

And still positive ELISA and WB two years after IV treatment
http://www.lymefriends.org/profile/blake

Posts: 607 | From Tick Town, Connecticut | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
1rosepedal
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I'm so glad I still have a sense of humor. That's about the one part of my brain that still functions.

These posts have been great for lifting my spirits!!

[lol]

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proudtoserve
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I went to try and shave my legs for the first time in a month and borrowed his shaving cream....

My husband keeps a large can of shaving cream on the bathroom counter..

Well.... I only needed to use a little bit so I got out the small can under the sink and used htat one...

NOW, It wasnt until my husband asked me later that day "why did you open my travel size shaving cream?"

I thought for a moment and was totally embarassed as I explained "I only needed a little bit of shaving cream, so I got the small can"..... [shake]

He laughed and looked at me like I was crazy. Before he could say anything else I said "ya ya I know NOW how silly it was, but it made total sense at the time". [bonk]

So now he is making fun, he set out the travel size tooth paste and lotions ect. He has fun with my lyme brain. [lol]

Proud [Smile]

--------------------
PROUD : )

 -
Dx: Lyme & Bart April 2008.
currently on plaquanil, Roxid and Sulfameth.

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Larkspur
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I went out doing errands a couple years ago...I got some Mums and went to put them on the front porch. Then I went inside.

Several hours later our neighbor knocked on the door - I had apparently left the driver's side car door wide open with my purse on the passenger's seat!

The neightbor thought I had been abducted!

--------------------
"We must be willing to get rid of
the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us" - e.m. forster

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wiserforit
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I decided to get gussied up and go out to a restaurant with friends.

Upon arriving at the restaurant, my friend asked me why I only made up one eye.

Well, truth be told, I applied make-up to my right eye twice! (Nothing to left eye.)

There I was walking around looking like the poster for Clock-Work Orange!

Hmmm.... thank heavens for honest friends!

wiserforit
[Wink]

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njlymemom
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I have worn 2 different earrings - very different
earrings [bonk]

I have written checks for not the bill amount
but for the balance in my checkbook, luckily
caught it before it was mailed. [shake]

Have gotten lost in town, and have lived here
for 18 years. [loco]

Could not recognize one of my closest friends,
her remark was "wow, but I am the only Chinese
resident in this town!" Thank God for her
sense of humor.

Have flooded our basement. Was washing something
by hand in the small sink and the water was running to fill the sink up. I couldn't hear b/c
of ringing in my ears and my vision was all
"wiggly". I forgot the water was running and it
ran for 5 hours. My husband walked in and asked
why the sump pump was coming on. I couldn't hear
that either. What a mess.

Forgot I was cooking ribs on the grill. Grill
caught on fire, I burned my arm trying to put it
out. Firemen came, they said what a shame about
the ribs. [confused]

Have gone to the wrong school to pick up my
daughter. [Roll Eyes]

I call people by the wrong names all the time.


To look at me, so far, you would never think
all this was going on. I guess I just look
really loony!

--------------------
This is NOT medical advice - and should NOT be used to replace your MD's advice. Info is only the opinion of those who publish the site.


The shortest way to do many things is to do only one thing at a time.

cb

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Tracy9
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Proud to serve, that is hysterical!

I had to read it twice, because it made perfect sense to me too!

--------------------
NO PM; CONTACT: [email protected]

13 years Lyme & Co.; Small Fiber Neuropathy; Myasthenia Gravis, Adrenal Insufficiency. On chemo for 2 1/2 years as experimental treatment for MG.

Posts: 4480 | From Northeastern Connecticut | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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