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» LymeNet Flash » Questions and Discussion » General Support » my mom bad shape/nursing homes in NJ?

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Author Topic: my mom bad shape/nursing homes in NJ?
mtree
LymeNet Contributor
Member # 14305

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Hi All, [hi]

Haven't been on LymeNet much....but always thinking of you all...

my mom has declined in her health and was admitted into the hospital new years eve and today will be transfered to a rehab-facility.

we have maybe a week to find her a nursing home....

we have been trying to be pro-active with her for 3 years and now it has come that we have to be re-active...

Was wondering if any of my LymeNet friends in NJ have any comments on a nursing home here in NJ...

any info would be great...good/bad/horrible...

we have feelers out but wow what a job...and responsibility knowing this is where your mother will die......
she's in bad shape and not realy making to much of an effort to live...

overwhelmingly sad...
she is in PA so it's been even harder....

thanks so much,
[toilet] mtree

--------------------
worrying about tomorrow takes its strength away from today

Posts: 968 | From Point PLeasant , NJ | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
piper
LymeNet Contributor
Member # 25946

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My mother was ill for a long time and I ended up putting her at the Monmouth Care Center (nursing home) Its in Long Branch, near Monmouth Medical. Walking distance from NJ transit (train). I live in NYC and came down every weekend plus other times. The staff were very kind. She was on hospice for @ 9 months while there and died there as well. Overall felt positive about her stay there. you can contact me by PM if you would like. p.
Posts: 119 | From New York New York | Registered: May 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Elaine G
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mtree,
If you are looking for nursing home in NJ try the link below, it will give you inspection summaries:

Nursing home search NJ

Medicare also has a rating system devised for all nursing homes try doing a search on:
Medicare search of nursing homes

Please remember not all nursing home are equal. Take the time to find her a good one with these two searches. Availability is another problem, if they have a bed for her. You need to act immediately because the rehab facility will want to move asap.

If you are moving her from PA to NJ, you need to find at least two good facilities by visiting them and talking to administration to see if they have a bed available. Better long term care facilities have waiting lists. If she is a self pay she probably has a better chance of getting a bed, although most medicaid homes also have to fill that quota also.

I wish you and your Mom well, I know, from experience, it is very stressful.

Elaine

Posts: 671 | From Fort Myers, Florida | Registered: Jun 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tricia386
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You are in my prayers, I cant imagine how hard this must be.

--------------------
Lyme activated in April 2010 by gardasil vaccine.
DX: Lyme,Babs,Myco,Bart 11/10
Treatment Started: 3/28/11

Posts: 1752 | From Albany, NY | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lightparfait
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Heath Village is fantastic! I caread for both inlaws with alzheimers and eventually had to put them in a home for safety reasons. To pay for two is overwhelming when they still had money and not on medicaid. If you are in this situation, put them in a medicare facility that guanantees medicaid when the money runs out. Health had FANTASTIC nursing staff who really cared. All Philipino staff , young, with energy and lots of love. It was 1 hr from our home, but worth the drive for their care and the cost.
My father in law died almost 7 months ago and it was handled with dignity and love for them and the family, and just today, my moterh in law is exected to die in a few hours. A ver natural death for them both, related to alzheimers. We are greiving today, but know we have loved them and gave them the best care when with us and now at the facility. It is a loving thing to do to have them in a facility when it is needed...and I recommend Heath village as athey have 5levels of care...apartments, assisted living in two phases of assistance, rehab, and nursing home, with a whole floor just for dimentia as well. the grounds are spectacular, in a Horse area with a day care facility next door that visits the nursing home weekly. the rooms are decorated beautifully and clean!!!!All positive.
best wishes to all caregivers
lp

Posts: 1009 | From NJ | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lightparfait
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Oh I forgot to tell you where Heath Village is located...its in Hacketstown NJ...hunterdon county. Near Oldwick.
Posts: 1009 | From NJ | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lymephobic
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mtree...I sent you a pm...

Genesis in Point pleasant has some phenominal nurses (I happen to know one that worked there and she gave it a big thumbs up)

ANd I know the Reformed Church Home is an outstanding facility.

Good Luck...hugs being sent your way...

Posts: 193 | From New Jersey | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Elaine G
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mtree,
I would have recommended Bridgeway in Bridgewater but it is too far from you. My Mom was treated so well there and lived to be over 100 years old.

You have some good recommendations that are in your area.

Let us know when she is settled.

I'm thinking of you, it's not an easy part of your Mom's life and it will be hard for you. As long as she is getting good care, it will make things easier for both of you.

Hugs to you both, you need it.

Elaine

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mtree
LymeNet Contributor
Member # 14305

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thank you all for your responces....it does help...

I will be checking into them this week....

lightparfait... I'm so sorry about your mother-in-law....
no matter how much we prepare ourselves for the loss of a parent it still hits you hard and you realise you could never really prepare yourself...
prayers to you and your family...

again thank you all for your responces...
[Smile] mtree

--------------------
worrying about tomorrow takes its strength away from today

Posts: 968 | From Point PLeasant , NJ | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
MissMari
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Hi mtree ---I hear you about this. It is a very difficult thing to have to consider a nursing home.

Please do investigate and see them before making a decision. Remember that what goes on on the floors and units is what is important, since the admissions floor and reception areas can be deceiving.

It sounds like you have some good suggestions here. I was going to suggest Genesis and Monmouth Care (I had a few of their assistants in my classes over the years and they were good people); I think you need the NJ shore area?

Old Bridge has good recommendations as well.

The other suggestion I have is when everything is in place, that it is important to visit as much as possible, at different times, to make sure care is being handled well.

Hugs to you!

--------------------
The Bite: July 1995
Next 13 years: Treated for things I didn't have
Symptom total: 45
1 faint Lyme IgM May 2000
5 More negative tests
IGeneX says YES! 3/16/09
Finally feel human: 2012

Posts: 120 | From Plainsboro NJ | Registered: Feb 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
phyl6648
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
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Mtree, so sorry about your Mom.. I know how hard this is to do. I had to put my Mom in the NH she was there for 3 years. Looking back I am wondering if she had Lyme.

She was so unhappy there and oh the guilt I carried but no way I could keep her at home. We tried to hire sitters but just didn't have the equipment and help she needed. So many NHs are short handed and the pts. are neglected so keep a close eye out for her.

I can't offer any help as to a NH for you but can so sympathize how hard this is on you.

Prayers

Posts: 1058 | From VA | Registered: Oct 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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