oh boy. I have been off abx now for about a month and some days. I had bad episodes on the abx but this last 'episode' was crazy.
i guess i just wanted to see if anyone else goes through this because it scares the **** out of me.
let me try and describe it, this is hard to do. I start to feel this tension building up in my body, this agitation I can't get under control. this is unprovoked. then i go searching and make a scenario where i can release this horribleness in me.
for instance i'll imagine my boyfriend cheating on me, my mind races, i get up--tell him off. i scream and yell. any noises or heat set me off. i'm sweating.
during one of these episodes i actually got out of the car on the highway, ran back to the car. my bf drove to a parking lot. he rolled up the window and i lost it, hitting everything.
i got out and hit my hand so hard on the car bruising myself badly. then i turned and ran full speed into a clearing in the parking lot. i laid down and hyperventilated, cried. walked back to the car.
and i cried and hyperventilated until it finally passed. this is also seizure-like. I know this is not my personality. It scares me. I feel as if I have no control but im conscious.
i'm so mean and aggressive, then really emotional. the tension is released and i am drained for the entire day. huh.
is this babesia rage?
i'm afraid to think i have some serious mental disorder. my brain just seems so sick sometimes.
right now im on namenda lamictal sertraline trazadone
any thoughts?
Posted by Fuel1212 (Member # 29312) on :
Well, not sure if it is babesia or just a component of Lyme as a whole.
Know this... my LLMD told me about a case that proved Lyme causes major rage.
A man killed his wife and got off based on proof from medical doctors that Lyme was the cause of his rage.
Posted by philly78 (Member # 31069) on :
This is yet another thing that I can relate to. I must say though, that I've attributed this to a combo of bart and my adrenals being so messed up.
May I ask why you are off abx? Are you on any herbals or something else for the lyme and cos?
Sorry you're brain is feeling so messed up.
Posted by jackie51 (Member # 14233) on :
I have always attributed rage to lyme and/or bartonella. Currently though I am doing herbals for babesia and seem to be yelling at the kids "more" for the slightest of things. I just thought they were being especially irritating and not that it could be babs. You've got me thinking.
I do hope you get to the root of this. I am not familiar with anything you are on. Perhaps your rage is a side effect of your medications.
Good luck.
Posted by Fuel1212 (Member # 29312) on :
Philly is right on also, I definitely think there is a correlation between adrenals and mood.
Please look into some good adrenal supplements - ADR by Pure Encapsulation - Energy Multi Plex by Researched Nutritionals
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Hormones may be involved also??
Posted by lymeboy (Member # 24769) on :
Bart seems to be a big culprit for rages.
Posted by nefferdun (Member # 20157) on :
Bart can send you to the looney bin, literally, so it is more likely to be causing your rage. Babesia makes you depressed and/or anxious.
I would get back on meds if I were you. i would also ask your doctor for something to temper your urge to explode.
Posted by lotus2686 (Member # 30680) on :
i sort of reached a plateau with the antibiotics i was on.
i need some structure and i believe stronger meds/iv therapy. until now my primary has been treating me. i made an appt with dr. e in jackson nj, a LLMD.
Posted by jackie51 (Member # 14233) on :
neff--what drugs temper the explosion urge? I've been feeling this the last few days.
Posted by philly78 (Member # 31069) on :
Good luck at your appt! This disease can be pretty rough at times. Hang in there.
Posted by Lyme Elle (Member # 30884) on :
My doc attributed this to mepron toxicity but it lasted several months after I took the mepron. She used methyl B12 and folate to get me back to normal. I was an absolute nut case and suffered from extreme paranoia.
Posted by 0ldman (Member # 22101) on :
Severe anger issues, on occasion anxiety attacks.
I've found that lortab or percocet seem to knock out whatever is causing the anger or the anxiety. Nothing else seems to help.
Typically, when I feel like that I'm hurting bad enough to take something anyway. It gets harder as I'm trying to stretch the pain killers until my next appointment.
Posted by little_olive (Member # 28063) on :
Posted on your other thread but reposting here, too.
This sounds like bartonella to me! My thing is to throw stuff, sometimes at people, but usually just to let out the sudden aggression. That's everything from office chairs to water bottles. It's amazing the things our brain comes up with during these times, how mad we get at people for no reason...
I'm sure Lyme can cause it, but for me personally it's always been bartonella. Bart rage, I call it. I agree with the others that Babs usually causes apathy/depression or anxiety.
For me it usually only lasts one day, and comes out in short bursts where I'm completely fine and normal in between them.
So sorry you're going trhough this but be sure to inform your partner that it's just the bugs! The bset thing you can do when it starts to creep up is know that it's NOT you, whatever thoughts yo're having are NOT truly your own, and if possible, stay away from people until it passes
Also you mentioned being off antibiotics and this is when the bartonella really comes back full force; it only takes a small amount of time because bart replicates every 5-7 days. Shortly after I had to stop abx last year, is when I began experiencing the rage symptoms. I'm on Rifampin and Zithro now, and it's kicking bartonella's butt Posted by lotus2686 (Member # 30680) on :
little_olive,
You explained it exactly. I believe i have babs/lyme as well because i definitely have the apathy, anxiety, and depression.
My boyfriend is really supportive. We've been going through these crazy episodes for years. I'm so grateful I'm getting close to getting this bugger under control so I could finally be myself.
You are definitely right on when you say it helps to know it's not you. There's nothing you did wrong, you're not crazy or overemotional, you're sick.
Most importantly everyone knows it's not me now. A big part of my episodes was an extreme feeling of guilt, for treating my family and friends terribly, not being able to control my thoughts and actions, being antisocial and judgmental.
I hope you feel better soon. Posted by little_olive (Member # 28063) on :
I understand completely. I remember once I all out collapsed in the middle of the floor and cried becuase I couldn't believe I was getting so angry and yelling at everyone, the people who cared the most for me, when they did absolutely nothing wrong, and yet I couldn't figure out what was happening... This was before I knew I had bartonella. At least knowing does make it a bit easier, for everyone involved.
I hoep you get to treat this coinfection very soon, and thank you
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