My mom who is my primary support person is really burned out from hearing my pessimism but I can't seem to pull myself out of it.
It just doesn't seem like I will ever have a normal life (career, family, etc.) after lyme.
I haven't been able to work for 2-1/2 years and just recently had my "real" diagnosis although we knew it was lyme or suspected it for a long time.
Does anyone ever feel like this? Is this a symptom of herxing? All I do is sleep and I just cannot go on like this. I feel very hopeless, sad and am having crying spells.
Any suggestions would greatly be appreciated.
Amanda
The depression really will pass, but when you're in the middle of it, it can be very severe and you will feel as if you'll be like this forever.
Depression is one of the diagnostic clues for Lyme disease. There's more about it in The Neuropsychiatric Aspects of Lyme Disease
Some people have found relief with antidepressants such as Prozac and Zoloft. It's well worth checking these out. I took an antidepressant for about 4 months. It didn't make me feel wonderful, but it did get me out of a major hole.
It is hard for the people around you to deal with the depression and other emotional aspects of Lyme. Not your fault at all, or theirs, just a fact. Your mom is welcome to email me, if she needs some reassurance that this is truly a symptom and will pass.
Like insomnia (me, as you can see). And if you are having depression and insomnia -- whoo, boy. That really stinks. And then if you're having one of those running-off-at-the-mouth, can't-get-off-a-topic attacks...well, huge hugs to you. It's miserable. But it passes.
Deep, steady, focused breathing also helped for me, and yoga, if you're up to it. Herbal remedies helped me with the anxiety, but not with the depression.
Welcome to the Herx Hotel. We hope your stay will be short...
I'm editing to add that yeast overgrowth can be another big factor in depression, so stick with the probiotics religiously.
[This message has been edited by minoucat (edited 21 May 2004).]
I can totally relate. some days I sleep almost eighteen hours and being depressed is the only herx sx I have. I am totally run down and have no motivation to do anything. But then I have to realize it that inside my body there is a war raging. That alone can be exhausting on a body. Chronic fatigue is a hard one to kick, are you taking supplements?? They will help. Water will help flush all the toxins out too.
I noticed that when I feel like this I also feel like I will ALWAYS feel like this. Don't buy the lie. Know that it is something that will pass and something that you have to go through to get better. You were sick for 2 1/2 years and been on treatment for only 2 weeks??? Even Ducks don't think you can get "cured" that quick. Give yourself at least four weeks this first round of abx to feel cruddy, the herxes, at least in my case, fade real quick like in a day I'll go from feeling like I just got stepped on by an elephant to feeling fine it just sort of fades. That is how I know it was a herx.
But let yourself heal. Keep talking about it, if people at home are unsympathic we are here to listen. A lot of people don't understand because they simply don't understand.
This is a marathon not a sprint. So settle in for the long haul and you will see that soon enough you will actually start to feel better.
As far as pulling yourself out of it, think of this, a herx is the toxins of dying lyme germs, right?? So basically your feeling their depression aren't you? I mean if you were dying off in droves like they are you would be a bit depressed wouldn't you? So there is one reason to feel good about feeling bad.
Remember my montra of peace during herxes
DIE KEETES DIE!!
Hope you feel better soon
A fellow herxer
James
But!! At least now you know what it is and can treat it.That is probably what is happening.The herx.
I try and drag myself out of bed regardless of how tired I feel as when I lay in bed everything is hurting so bad that it only makes me feel worse.Moving around helps with the pain and disperses the toxins that have built up in the system.
I have had counselling also which helped just to talk to someone independant who helped me understand and supported my feelings so that I knew that what I was feeling was normal.What normal person could go through years of illness and not feel depression.Everyone has it with lyme and it worse when the meds kick in.It does improve though.
Try and get out of bed and do something,anything to take your mind off what is happening to you.I found reading books really therapeutic when I was first ill as I needed to have something enjoyable,that didn't need so much energy and it takes you away to another place(without drugs).Sometimes I was too tired even to read so I do undertand.
Life is about happiness and that can come from the smallest things.You can still enjoy life even if you are sick.Think of it as a holiday from the rat race.You will get better,but not if you don't push yourself through and believe that when you feel really bad you are actually making progress and killing the little buggers in your system.
We have all been there,chin up and fight!!!
Take care,Sue from Downunder.
Remember that certain abx are worse about causing depression with lyme. ALL of them can cause it if you're killing keets in the brain....good news, bad news!
Flagyl is among the worst! keep that in mind! [also minocycline, since it works on the brain]
So hang in there, and keep doing your best to DO SOMETHING and keep a positive attitude so you can get well! It helps the body fight!
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oops!
Lymetutu
quote:
Originally posted by minoucat:
Your mom might like this group -- it's for caregivers who don't have Lyme. It's a safe place for people in your mom's situation to talk honestly and get the support they need.