Does anyone else feel like there entire life is on hold??
My husband refuses to communicate with me...laugh with me...comfort me...or just plain love me..."until I get better".

How do you argue with that? I just say that I am trying to get through this the best way I can. He lays around and feels sorry for himself. I asked to seek counseling to help us through and he said it is a waste of time "until you get better".

This has been going on for over a year now.
I was diagnosed in September of 03. I have been treated with oral abx, IV abx then back on oral abx...now I just wait "to get better". I can't exercise...I am tired all the time...just getting through the day is an effort. I just had surgery for heavy bleeding and to remove two ovarian cysts the size of golf balls. This was less than a week ago. I am still trying to recover from that.

What is a Lymie supposed to do??

I am lonely, tired, sad, in terrible constant pain and have very little joy in my life.

I can only hope...I do get better someday.

Nancy
 

i just wanted to say im sorry it has been so rough for you..it seems that your husband needs to be more understanding....

it will get better...i know only for me it has...just wondering are you following any yeast prevention things...i noticed i am more fatigued when i sway from the diet

has your husband researched lyme at all???
if not maybe he should so he can be more understanding...i wish there was something i could do to get you out of this slump...

e-mail me if you need to talk..

amyb

I think chronic illnesses really bring out the true character of individuals associated with the patient - good or bad. Many men are not terribly compassionate when their spouse is ill. It's a guy thing - you're not supposed to show emotions. And for some men, they've been brought up that illness is a sign of weakness. There is also the fact they are just plain scared! They dont' know how to deal with this, so they shut down.

That sounds like what is going on with your husband - he's scared and has shut down. By shutting down, he puts the disease in denial mode. He won't 'get in touch with his feelings' because that's not guy behavior. We women will talk that dead horse right into a grave!!!

He probably isn't open to learning anything about the disease either,which is sad. So while you may feel the need to educate to tell him how you are feeling, it may only serve to make things worse right now. It may come in time.

I think for the time being I would find support elsewhere, either with family or friends or here. Don't drive yourself crazy trying to get him to see the light.

I don't want to paint a pessimistic view on all of this, but it may take him time to come around to all of this. And it will be slowly. Counseling is certainly an excellent option if he is open to that. If he refuses and continues to have a pity party, then I'd take your couch with him on it and put it out on the front porch and lock the door behind it!!!!!!

Most importantly take care of you first. I know that can sound selfish, but if you are going to get better, then you have to put yourself first. Don't worry about if he is laying on the couch moping, you come first.
Take care, ok???
cootiegirl
 

There for the grace of God go's I.

If he dosen't then apparently he did not mean his vow's and that makes him a idiot or a wuss or misinformed, In sickness and health were in my vows. I hope that if I ever come to the end of my rope I will not ever act out my weaknesses and if I do Please God forgive me.

I feel for you and here's a GREAT BIG HUG

and a prayer.

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Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
 

Have you been to a Lyme support group? It sure made me feel better when I discovered I could to go a room filled with people going through what I'm going through.

And you may even meet a spouse of another Lymie who went through what your husband is going through. Maybe get advice that way.

It hurts me to read your post. You need to be loved and comforted now, more than ever.