Do you think it's important to have a life purpose? What is your life purpose, if you think you have one? Just one thing or many things?
Sorry, about the really long post. I removed it since I think it was not really communicating my feelings that well. Maybe it's just one of those things where heartfelt feelings don't translate into words without sounding confused (and rambling ). It's not like anyone (that I know of) can rip their heart out and put it in words.
-john
[ 16. July 2007, 08:05 PM: Message edited by: sunnyslumber ]
Posted by Allison Smith (Member # 11631) on :
What is of significance to you? What may seem INsignificant to you in your daily life, may affect another person in a very positive way.
Every person has a purpose, whether we feel we can actually fulfill that.
A smile to a passing stranger may help them see that life isn't all that bad. And inturn brings home more happiness to their home.
Holding a door open for a person in a world where nice things like that aren't done anymore, shows everyone around you at that time that compassion exists.
Life is hard for everyone, in their own way. What's hard for me might be trivial to someone else.
Everyone has problems and feelings of despair, especially if you have Lyme. I'm 31 years old, and I can barely make it to the bathroom by myself...sometimes I don't make it in time.
That's a far cry from the girl who was a championship Catcher for the Girls Softball team of 9 years not so long ago.
Things change, but what is always constant is the fact that everyone has value, no matter what the circumstance is.
You may not be able to do the things now that you use to, but adapt. Find something worth while that your body can do. Volunteer.
I volunteer all the time. It's hard, my body aches, but during it...I forget how I hurt because I'm helping another person.
I hope this helps and is in someway an answer you are looking for.
Posted by CaliforniaLyme (Member # 7136) on :
Dear John,
I think things like, "Gosh, it would take X years to go back to school and get a degreee in blank and I would be blank years old- but I will be that old in blank years wihtout a degree too!" (I only have a BA; everyone in my family has an advanced degree).
You may still be physically sick; I am lucky enough to have no symptoms these days- it does affect how we imagine our futures- I hope you get better and feel up to your dreams because they are no one elses, like children, they are only ours really- best realized by us- but I know those kind of thoughts- generally- yours regarding science are not the same- I know that- and your place in it-
When I start thinking those kind of thoughts about age I remind myself of Clara Barton- who founded the Red Cross at age 60 and ran it for the next 20 years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That helps me-
Take care- Best wishes, Sarah
Posted by GenaD (Member # 11988) on :
John, when you feel better and have the energy to do what you want, you're NEVER to old to pursue a dream!
Allison, I agree with what you're saying. Helping others or contributing doesn't necessarily have to be in a "big" way. Most of the time we don't know how we're affecting people.
I'm a counselor, and I used to be an outreach worker, driving around in a van for a social service agency, trying to find homeless youth and bring them to our shelter where we provided all kinds of services for them.
Doing this, I met a lot of adult homeless. They were living in abandoned buildings and in the woods. Many were mentally ill, most were addicted to drugs.
I learned so much about life and about these people--they all had a story. Most of them had been contributing members to society before and though living very differentlifestyles from anything I'd ever been part of, I found that I could like these people and relate to them on many levels.
I wanted to get all of them in rehab and change their lives. I wanted to change the world! Only 2 went to rehab in the 3 years I worked that job, and I'm not sure now if those 2 even stayed clean. I didn't feel like we did much but talk and I was pretty sure the talking fell on deaf ears.
Now that I'm sick I don't work and often feel useless and like I contribute nothing. Even if the talking I did on outreach didn't work, I at least felt good to be trying to do something so potentially helpful.
I try to remember what one of the very well-spoken homeless men said to me when I was leaving my job. In tears he told me, "I know you wanted to get me off the street and off drugs, and I never did it...but you need to know that just coming out here into my world and opening up to me has done so much for me."
Recently, the new outreach team who replaced me and my partner called me and said that one of the other homeless men, a man who was 56, found out he had lung cancer and was given 6 months to live. He needed to see me.
Last month,I spent a few days out of the week sitting with him at his VA hospital. He told me so many times how he wished he had gotten clean when I was trying to talk to him about it, but mainly he told me over and over how much he loved me for reaching out to him and helping him--just by talking to him and making him feel like a person when most of society overlooks the homeless addicts. He died June 21st. I know just sitting with him at his nursing home meant the world to him.
There are many ways to make a difference, even when we're sick. What seems small to us are often huge to others. The "random acts of kindness" go a long way in putting positive energy and love into this world!
I know many of us are too sick to even get to the bathroom on our own let alone even THINK about contributing to the world, but I think when we get better (WHEN!) we will never be too old to pursue our dreams, no matter how small or big the dream is! I'm just saying we need to remember that even acts that seem small and effortless can be doing wonders for others!
Posted by sunnyslumber (Member # 7065) on :
Thanks Allison Smith, CaliforniaLyme, and GenaD!
A lot of times those little things are the things a person (or at least me) can forget about (because they are thinking about their own problems). So I have a lot of those, but maybe, I should set a time aside not think of them, so I can be more aware of others. With lyme, however, it feels harder to do since it is harder to "see" people's emotions.
You all sound like really good people. CaliforniaLyme: The Red Cross example is definately one to remember, since she must have been extremely vibrant to do something that sweeping at an older age!
GenaD, I think that you cared about the homeless people you were trying to get off drugs really showed through in your post.
It must be a heartening thought to think someone else thinks your life matters enough to spend an extended time to help you. I'm really sorry about your friend who died of liver cancer but I'm sure you made his last few days much better for him to die knowing someone cares about him and not to die alone (which must be terrible).
Allison, the thought that our value as people is the same no matter what can be a frustrating thought for me, becease often what we experience in life is so removed from that. I probably have a tendency to let other people's opinions effect me too much since its hard for me to stand the feeling that everyone likely thinks I'm "the stupid kid".
It's a good insight to know that your value doesn't change, but how people judge(or view) you changes, and also (obviously) your capacities. For myself the feeling that there is a lot of tension between what I percieve my inner state and how people see me as a person. Also in the world it seems like it is that way ... people say this or that group of people is intrinsically valuable but it doesn't show in their actions towards them.
Sheesh, sorry to write so much. Hope it is clear. (you can always hope right?!)
Posted by bettyg (Member # 6147) on :
john, and all others,
enjoyed reading your thoughts, feelings, and DREAMS!
when talking to a former co-worker before I left/quit work after 30 yrs. 7 months, I told her I wanted to b a writer! HERE I AM ... WRITING! Never in a million years to so many thousands of folks who have joined since I've been sending my newbie package info!
we ALL contribute in our own ways; some are out in the open to know who has done what, and many are BEHIND THE SCENES not telling their names just going for anonimity!
John, I did read what you sent me; deep philosophical. Posted by CaliforniaLyme (Member # 7136) on :
Betty G you are part of what makes LymeNet work to help people- you may THINK you're anonymous but you're not*)*!)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We all know how much you do- a lot!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by GenaD (Member # 11988) on :
Another thought...
We may feel like we have less value since having Lyme, but not only is having Lyme ultimately making us stronger and teaching us something (which we may not yet know), it's also teaching others something.
Perhaps it's teaching others compassion and sensitivity. We're also drawing attention to Lyme so that future generations won't go through what we have to go through to even get diagnosed.
It sounds like a cliche, but I guess cliches exist because they're proven over and over--We just have to remember that there is a reason for why all of this is happening.
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
). It's not like anyone (that I know of) can rip their heart out and put it in words.![[Wink]](wink.gif)