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Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
I just need to get this out!

Every single year since I was three I've gone with my family to the beach.

Well this year I am way too sick to go. And I don't have the money anyway since all this treatment is so expensive.

Now I am told my family will be gone on my bday. All of this wouldn't be so bad if the newest member of our family hadn't made a mockery of me and my illness!

Ill spare you the details of what this person has done to me regarding my illness. Trust me its bad!

Anyway I guess them going to the beach with this person and without me I've been dealing with but now on my birthday.

I know my family has to keep living their lives and things don't stop because I'm sick but the punches just keep on coming.

I'm not trying to feel sorry for myself I'm just sad. It wouldn't be so hard if this person hadn't mocked me about being sick.

Thank you guys for listening. So sad.
 
Posted by GretaM (Member # 40917) on :
 
Messa, I am glad that lyme net is a place to voice our frustrations about this disease. I am sorry that you are too ill this year to go to the beach with your family, and even more sorry that you have a family member who is not 100% behind you.

Just know that there is an entire group of people in this forum who are behind you, and who understand how devastating it is to not be able to continue with traditions or hobbies etc. because of this terrible infection.

I wholeheartedly hope and pray that next year you will be feeling well enough to go to the beach with your family. Sending lots of kind and supportive thoughts for recovery your way...

[ 06-26-2013, 12:04 AM: Message edited by: Robin123 ]
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
Thank you Greta. You are very kind.

As soon as I was finally diagnosed with Lyme disease this person in my family "claimed" they had Lyme disease. Then they "cured" themselves with oils. In three months!

This person puts me down for taking abx and seeing an Llmd. "If she would do what I've done she would be well by now. I've tried to tell her. Family can be the worst."

This person loves to see me sick and tells all my old friends all these things. It is truly truly hurtful and mean.

I am VERY ill and how dare this person! This person was never sick to begin with. This person in my family is pshyco and my family has not been the same since this person entered our lives. Trust me its really bad!

Anyway I just had to get this out. Shew!
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
If anyone can give me tips on how to deal with this person. I've tried to go my own way and not have contact. But this person is wont let things go.

Anytime this person hears I'm not doing well they are on my case to just take oils. Oils oils oils!

Ugh!
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
Thank you mothernat. I think I will treat myself out as soon as I'm able to. Thank you for your ideas.

I've lost many friends and I'm afraid I'm going to lose more.
 
Posted by Robin123 (Member # 9197) on :
 
I think they're trying to "fix" you in order not to take in what you're going through. That's their problem.

A couple things about this - if we can get really good at letting other people have their problems but not letting it affect us. I know - a tall order, but I have learned to meditate inside me when others have problems with my reality. They are not ready to take in what is happening.

Another way of dealing with it - to let the person know that you're happy that oils worked for them, that you are aware of the issue, but that you're pursuing other remedies for now, and to please not advocate it for you.

It's like having to be a broken record. "Yes, I'm aware of that (whatever they're saying), but for now I'm pursuing other remedies."

Re loss - yes, we go through a lot of losses with this illness. Is your family going to observe your birthday with you at all?

I try to find a substitute way of dealing with losses, as in, if I can't do something, maybe there's another way that I can observe the occasion.
 
Posted by BoxerMom (Member # 25251) on :
 
PMed you.
 
Posted by OtterJ (Member # 30701) on :
 
Get a bottle of skunk oil. When she is acting evilly, say, "Ive heard oils can cure a bad attitude," and proceed to spray her.

Okay, only do this when she really, really ****es you off and imagine a very large atomizer filled with skunk oil. At least her body and her psyche will stink the same and people will be forewarned.
 
Posted by linky123 (Member # 19974) on :
 
Many of us can relate to what you are going through.

My SIL works in the medical field and thinks she knows everything.

She can be really mean and sounds a lot like your family member.

I really don't know why we have to endure these toxic people. Maybe to learn patience and perseverance?

Anyway, I don't know how to advise you except to say that you can try to minimize contact with her.

After my SIL's last insult, I decided I no longer was obligated to spend time with her.

She lives in another state, thank God, so I just go to funerals. That's it.

No more holidays, birthdays. Did that stuff for years when I was so sick and just got insulted for it.

It is so liberating to realize we don't have to put up with it.

I no longer worry about what they think.

Take care and come to lymenet when you need support.
 
Posted by lpkayak (Member # 5230) on :
 
so sorry you are going thru this...i do understand esp this: but the punches just keep on coming.

yes-a lot of us go thru this but it still hurts a lot

the birthday thing bothers me cuz my kids never have time to send me cards either

for me letting myself cry it out...and complaining on here have been things that have helped reduce the hurt and accept the situation

take care of you. try to figure out small things that bring you joy. and plan to do those things on your bday
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
Thanks everyone. Yea it's just been a rough ride really. This person is my SIL and my brothers second wife. His first wife passed away of cancer and I loved her dearly. She was my matron of honor.

My new SIL thinks she's dr Quinn medicine woman because she sells oils. It's tough to have no contact with her because my son and her step son (son of my first SIL) are best friends. Yet my nieces n nephews had to call her momma from day one!

Anytime she hears I've gone downhill she scoffs at my abx attempt. There's so much to the story I could write a novel and she's put my family through you know what. But this mockery of my illness just takes the cake!

Thanks again guys.
 
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
 
Very sad you can't be with your family!! Extended family members can be a pain sometimes!!

As for the oils, I use them and love them but I would never claim that they cure Lyme. I think they can really help though.

Hang in there!! [Smile]
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
Yes I do use oils often for a few symptoms. Thanks
 
Posted by linky123 (Member # 19974) on :
 
How funny...my SIL's favorite TV show is Dr Quinn.
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
Lol
 
Posted by Messa (Member # 38065) on :
 
Ipkayak, I'm sorry to hear that your kids don't even send you a card. Thank you for your support.
 


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