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» LymeNet Flash » Questions and Discussion » Medical Questions » Tired of Being Labeled Ditzy

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Author Topic: Tired of Being Labeled Ditzy
myahbv
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Ive laughed it off for years ...family and now co-workers..yea i'm blonde but and maybe not the smartest duck in the pond...

and i'm very slow with "catching on to things" , have very little sense of direction, get lost easily....half the time don't distinguish left from right

can't always say the word i mean to say, just very frustrating knowing this is how i look to others..i don't want to be labeled dumb or slow, cuz i'm not

how do i deal with this? how do i show people i'm not "ditzy"? I try and explain to co-workers that i have lyme and it takes a little while for me to catch on to my job duties

longer than it does ppl who are not fighting disease...they look at me like "ok, you look fine to me" like i'm a liar and hypocondriac , kinda like the "ducks" look at me

how do i cope with this, feel like i'm doing more time defending or trying to prove my disease to others than actually getting treatment....all advice is welcome..thanks and god bless all

Posts: 33 | From kentucky | Registered: Mar 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Michelle M
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You poor dear.

We feel your pain!!!

Explain that you are NOT stupid.

Explain that your brain processes things more slowly than others because you have a brain disease which you are currently treating. Do they laugh and make fun of people with seizures? Dementia? Brain tumours? No, of course not.

Have them do some reading. Here is where they could start:

Columbia Lyme's Neuro Lyme Description

I find, too, that it makes things easier to poke a little fun at myself before other people get a chance to. It kind of 'softens the blow.' [bonk] Meaning, it's OK if I do it; it may or may not be OK if you do it!!! [Wink] You can tell whether people are doing it lovingly or cruelly. There's lots of good information here on neurological lyme. Have them look at a SPECT scan of a lyme'd person's brain vs. a regular brain. HUGE difference. It might promote some understanding!!

And feel free to come vent here ANYTIME!!

[group hug]

Michelle

Posts: 3193 | From Northern California | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
myahbv
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thank you Michelle....its just really hard to make believers out of people you are around everyday.....

and i do what you suggested, make fun of myself first but i get tired of doing that cuz i'm actually a very smart person...or am i? i've had this for so long , forgot what i was like before 17.

thanks so much....take care

Posts: 33 | From kentucky | Registered: Mar 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Michelle M
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Something else you can do to help make it "real" to non-believers...

A neuropsych exam... takes a couple hours. Really helps to pinpoint where your difficulties lie with processing speed, multi-tasking, etc... as OPPOSED to intelligence!!

Also, a SPECT scan.

Sometimes seeing these things on paper will make people stop a little short of thinking you're just a ditz and make them realize it's an actual brain disease, and you're not just an idiot.

I used to try and hide it, and make excuses regularly to try and cover up.

Eventually I gave that up (people weren't really buying it anyway).

Now I simply refer to it as a "good head day" or a "bad head day."

I will be driving down the road knowing full well my destination but having absolutely no idea how to get there. I'll go in what seems like it might be the general direction, hoping it will come to me.

That's when I remember where I'm going at all!!

That's a bad head day!!

Or people talking rapid-fire, and I'm a dozen questions/comments behind?? Yup.

Depending where you are in treatment, you might still have a better outcome!!

You're in good company here ... there's a lot of us right there with you!

Look into brain supplements too -- such as CoQ10 and Gingko Biloba...they do help!

Michelle

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Robin123
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Maybe it could help if you had a list of neurolyme symptoms you could hand out for educational purposes. I try to turn around every comment, whether positive, neutral or negative into an opportunity to educate about Lyme/co's.
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cjnelson
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quote:
I find, too, that it makes things easier to poke a little fun at myself before other people get a chance to. It kind of 'softens the blow.' Meaning, it's OK if I do it; it may or may not be OK if you do it!!!


Totally agree!!!

THEY will not get it hon. Some might if they were truly interested but MOST are not interested enough to learn, really learn.

That takes time out of their own lives and they most likely wont do it. Just remember these people are co workers, you are there as a means

to an end. A paycheck. It may sound , huh, i cant find the word im looking for, [lol] isnt that a hoot!!!!

Concentrate on YOU, you know YOU and you know the WHY.

I always tell my girls and try to live by the same mottos the best i can:

1. Own your own truth and dont let ANYONE take it from you
2. Follow the 5 P's Philosphy:
Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance

The later has saved my hiney more times over than I can count. I have to follow that one else i find myself in your shoes more often than not. It really does help...

Good luck hon!!!

[group hug]

--------------------
Seeking renewed health & vitality.
---------------------------------
Do not take anything I say as medical advice - I am NOT a dr!

Posts: 830 | From TN | Registered: Aug 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
MagicAcorn
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I work and DO not discuss Lyme disease with my coworkers. They know I have it, heck I was even hired with it. Lyme is just something I have it is not who I am.

You can't show people you are not ditzy. They either think you're a ditz or they don't. All you can do is change your perception of yourself.

So many folks worry about others which just adds stress. The only people whose opinions at work that should matter are your supervisor's and the person who signs your check.

It may be a really good idea to write up a check list for yourself and to keep it with you at work. This way you can constantly look at it and know the next steps without asking coworkers again. Then maybe you won't feel so bad about not catching on to your job duties.

If you really think your job is too much and that you may get fired I'd look for a different job with less stress while you still had one. Even if it paid less than the one you have now it will pay more than unemployment or disability.

I have found Lyme is about balance. Balancing our lives to fit our diagnosis. I can't ski anymore but I can still snow tube and now even hop in a bobsled. I discovered this recently and I am hooked.

I look at myself as a masterpiece that is never done. Leonardo worked on the Mona Lisa until his death (about 12 years). I've had Lyme for eleven now and I am not stopping at all. Instead I've worked at reinventing myself to fit my bodies new design.

I would give up on the coworkers - too big of a task. They don't want to change since you are the one that has to fit in. Do you know what I mean?

I would stop all talk of Lyme because it is probably having the complete opposite effect of the one you want. It probably looks to be an excuse instead of the real cause.

I'd try to find ways to make your job easier without asking for it. The check list of job duties probably being of utmost importance. Your image with your colleagues may soften if you stop asking them what comes next.

If you don't talk about Lyme you do not have to defend yourself. Remember other people at work have MS, diabetes, cancer and they still go on and so will you. For Boomers being sick and continuing to work is the new norm.

It is when we give up and feel defeated ourselves that we are lost. I get down sometimes but I get back up too. My nature is one of wanting to experience new things, and to be where the action is.

As for making believers out of your coworkers? The great leaders of the world lead by doing. The actions bring the belief not their words.

I look at working as a opportunity to show the world how much I still have even after all I have been through. You can't keep a good Lymie down.

Hugs,
Acorn

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