his body a small prayer

in the space next to mine

his brow hot

in his sleep he murmurs, "no..."

i couldn't sleep again last night

his teacher called to apologize

she had to remove him from the class today

everything had seemed okay

("he's sooo bright, by the way")

when, out of the blue,

he began to sing a melody

and then couldn't stop

he evidently got quite upset

but finally...

just laughed it all away

it was an inside joke you see,

"I can't see my head and my mouth is too

small for the words i need!"

I couldn't sleep again last night

when i slipped out of bed into the darkness

and crept to my library of papers

sifting through them

like a Midas searching for gold

trying to find just the right words

to give him one more day to be

just another lamb in the fold

sometimes i can't sleep at night

when i feel his fate there

right in the palm of my hand

balanced ever so carefully

reflecting back all my hope

like a fragile pool of mercury

andie

What an awesome expression of your pain and compassion for your son...

May you and your son get all of the love and support you deserve.

Love and peace,

This brought tears to my eyes. You expressed yourself and your pain for your child so perfectly.

It touches deeply, I have too held my son's hot body against me while he slept praying for God to help me, lead me to what I need to make him better.

I found Lymenet on one of my sleepless mid night searches for help and in turn found Dr. C. We are well on our way to getting better now.

I pray for both you and your son to start feeling better soon.

Starr

Thank you for all the love and warmth in your replies to my post.

I'm glad you responded; I felt embarrassed to have revealed so much...in a poem no less.

I spend so much of my time being together, solution-focused, optimistic and strong that I've stopped being able to cry.

(Actually, that's not true. Now I break down whenever I get good news; I'm just so grateful!)

My original plan when writing was to give a "newsy" update on JC's lack of progress despite all the abx since May.

Also the fact that we will probably have to look for a "special school" for him and put him on psychotropic meds.

My feelings came out instead. I guess it's just one of the many "faces" of Lyme.

BTW, I "know" you both understand; I've read several of your previous posts. Feeling understood is an amazing comfort.

Thank you so much for including me in the group hug.I really need it right now.

love,
andie

I cannot even imagine what it must be like for a mother or a father to watch their child go through what I go through. I cannot imagine how I will feel if my son is sick with Lyme. I will fight with my last breath to get him the help/doctors/medication, etc he will need but there will be nothing I will be able to do about the symptoms, etc, that he will experience.