bejoy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11129
posted
I think lyme has hit me so hard because of stress on my body due to certain situations and beliefs.
I don't believe anyone chooses lyme, or could fight it off by simply thinking or wishing it away.
I do believe that reducing stress on the mind and body gives us more energy to cope with illness and to heal.
I have come in and out of remission over the years, as I have taken better care of myself, or have lost myself to stress. This is without having known the underlying bacterial problem.
I believe my false "stress stories" have lowered my immune system and allowed lyme to take over my body.
Here they are:
People who work harder and try harder get the love. Others are wimps and get the shame. Sleep and rest are a waste of time, and get you no recognition.
Only girlies pamper and nurture themselves. Girlies get no respect. Be a tough guy, and don't indulge in self-care.
I'm alone. Nobody really wants to know me or love me. I have to handle it myself. Nobody will protect and defend me.
If I'm sick I'll be left alone and nobody will want me. Don't give in to or admit illness or weakness of any kind.
I have to absorb all the anger to keep everyone else safe.
Here's what is getting me well and keeping me well (along with all the stuff I swallow, apply, and soak in every day):
Asking my husband to protect and defend me, and to not say things that sound shaming, degrading, or critical.
Not allowing anyone to raise their voice or agressive energy at me or to use demeaning language towards me.
Telling people to take their anger someplace else, and come talk to me as soon as they know what they want and can make a respectful request.
Respecting my need for sleep, rest, and self-care. Insisting that others give me space for that.
Smiling at people. Letting healthy people and not just needy people into my life.
Girl power. I look good with my feet soaked and my toenails painted.
How about you?
bejoy
-------------------- bejoy!
"Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Posts: 1918 | From Alive and Well! | Registered: Feb 2007
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posted
I KNOW that stress is what triggered my symptoms. I've had Lyme for 35 years, but only had symptoms four times all due to stress.
This time it was an extended stress and this is the first time I have known that it is Lyme. This is also the first time I've needed medical care to overcome it. Not to say I did nothing before, but rest, sunshine, fresh air, proper diet, and exercise made me better.
It's amazing what stress can do to us! My immune system has proven over the years that it CAN fight this bug unless I'm under emotional stress.
I think the biggest "false stress" is that 'doing' is more important than 'being'. When it gets right down to it, those you love only care that you are, not about what you have done.
To get better (in addition to all I swallow as well --
Hubby protects me.
I've minimized contact with stressful people (some I don't talk to at all).
I spend my day taking care of me -- sauna, exercise, daily decaf organic latte -- the laundry and housecleaning can be done by someone else.
I've painted my toenails purple.
I need lots of hugs and someone to whine to.
-------------------- sixgoofykids.blogspot.com Posts: 13449 | From Ohio | Registered: Feb 2007
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Geneal
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 10375
posted
Geez....I may never get well or in remission then.
I guess Hurricane Katrina was the big stress kicker for me.
I know I've had symptoms (vague not accute) for probably 4 years at least.
It was during the year after Katrina that I started to really get ill.
Here's the kicker though.
I just kept attributing my symptoms to all of the stress and
Ignoring physical signs that my body was giving me.
Since I just found out my five year old daughter has Lyme (today)
and am getting ready to finally build a new house,
and am waiting for my son's Igenex results....
Also dealing with a husband with Lyme....
Stress, stress and more stress.
However, I do pray....Cry when I need to like this morning when my hair
Was falling out in handfulls, take a deep breath and
Try to look forward to less stressful times in my life.
Hugs,
Geneal
Posts: 6250 | From Louisiana | Registered: Oct 2006
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posted
Geneal, some stress we just can't avoid! Building a new house should be a happy time.
Getting everyone on the path to wellness is happy, too.
Mine got bad just like you said, after a stress like Katrina was for you. Each time I was obsessed with a situation.
"Good" stresses, like building a house, don't have the same effect on my health.
You'll get better!
I agree, the hair things stinks ... my hair stylist says mine's growing back. Fortunately, it was thick to begin with. Handfuls of hair is scary though.
-------------------- sixgoofykids.blogspot.com Posts: 13449 | From Ohio | Registered: Feb 2007
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bejoy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11129
posted
I guess there is that difference between the stressful event, and what we make it mean.
Nobody chooses or can get around a life crisis like...ahhh...finding out your child has lyme. So sorry, Geneal. Or like an unexpected death in the family, loss of a job, or even a hurricane.
When I'm in a crisis, that's when my "stuff" comes up. That old patterning that doesn't serve me, like my mistaken belief that nobody wants to or would help me out.
Playing the lone soldier in the middle of a crisis is what has taken me down time after time.
Yesterday I allowed other people to play chauffeur to my daughter for three different rides that I could have provided.
I had to try hard, but chose to just be grateful and not guilty. Its a start.
bejoy
-------------------- bejoy!
"Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Posts: 1918 | From Alive and Well! | Registered: Feb 2007
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Geneal
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 10375
posted
Thanks you guys.
You know one of the things that Katrina taught me was how to become a good receiver.
I always liked being the giver....the one who helps out....does everything for everybody...
Well, following Katrina, I had a crash course in being acceptful of other's contributions to me.
Then we had a church in Tennessee offer to put my family in a house..
It was no cost to us and for as long as we needed.
Thank you Lord Jesus.
We arrived late Saturday night....I went to church services Sunday.
The sermon was about being a good receiver...
The Pastor was talking about himself, but the sermon could have been written for me.
He said that you cheat others out of their blessings when you don't allow them to do for you.
I do so enjoy giving....I love how it makes me feel.
I have learned to be a gracious and humble receiver as well.
Without guilt...
We all need help every now and then..
Allow someone else to be blessed by letting them help you out.
I know that I have been blessed by all of you.
Hugs,
Geneal
Posts: 6250 | From Louisiana | Registered: Oct 2006
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posted
Geneal, that is so true. It's easy to give, it's hard to receive ... unless you're a little kid at Christmas!
-------------------- sixgoofykids.blogspot.com Posts: 13449 | From Ohio | Registered: Feb 2007
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Vanilla
Unregistered
posted
Geneal I am sorry to hear about your daughter and I am happy for you that you will have a new home.
This disease is a strange one with lots of lessons and some gifts too. It is very cool that Katrina taught you how to receive!
Oh my stress story was the death of my father which was made even more tragic by a control freak and greedy sister and my dad's ex from hell who is a control freak wealthy and greedy as well.
My sister was fighting with the ex and the ex succeeded in doing a divide and conquer deal on us sisters.
My dad's care are lost in the middle of this and I got treated like doggie doo doo being at the bottom of the pecking order.
The legal residue from this is almost over but it does continue and I was burned by lawyers, badly mistreated and insulted by my sister's lawyer and I will never talk to my sister again who has a hard time dealing with loss so took her wrath out on me and continues to do so.
My sister feels she has won because she managed to legally take more then her share due to an arrogant judge that found her credible when she was lying and obviously lying.
Oh my sister won nothing unless you just want to look at this from a material level.
I learned the legal system in my county is very corrupt and why.
I learned to turn things over to a higher power when the going gets tough and to avoid lawyers like the plague. I am sure I learned a lot more then that but those 2 things come to mind first.
Oh and I learned that people try to invalidate you in order to manipulate you and for a while I was falling for the invalidation and lies but no longer will I buy into it. That was an important lesson.
I learned I deserve to be treated nicely.
I also now get that I do not have to worry about revenge my sister and my dad's ex and the evil totally greedy lawyers will all get what is coming to them with out any outside help from me.
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posted
1) 3 years ago--> father died 2) 5 months later, grandfather committed suicide 3) 3 months later, grandmother died 4) 6 months later, ex-girlfriend of 3 years was cheating on me, and ran off, friend's wife cheating on him, other friend's wife was cheating on him, and several other co-workers, acquint., et cetera were also(all women, no known men)... it seemed to be a sudden epidemic. 5) 2 months later, never had been sick before and sudden pain in groin-- Doctor thought maybe testicular cancer or STD(from ex)--was neither. 6) 3 months later, quit job of 6 years in highest paid department in organization(worked with a lot of 50+ years olds who worked there for 20+ years, at the age of 27), because I didn't think I would make CFO/or CEO. New job paid triple I was making, but had toxic mold 7) 4 months later, chiropractor herniated disc in my back when images showed no prior problem(maybe it was from Lyme or weakness from the toxic mold). Couldn't walk for 6 weeks. 8) 3 months later, finally quit job, because my body was broken down from mold in building. 9) 3 months later, find out I had Lyme with toxic mold issue. 10) 3 months later-- suddenly overnight, after 2 months of treatment, couldn't tolerate any medicine, having to crawl to get to bathroom(if I could even have the energy), LLMD not helping me, vision going blurry(nearly passing out) just from sitting upright, 6 hour panic attacks with heart going crazy and can not move... possibly attributed to 1) reaction to MRI contrast dye 2) neurotoxicity from Art.(Polar Blast had same reaction) 3) some unknown reason.---Basically, was on death bed.
11) Now(3 months later), losing my house, gone through $40,000 of medical expenses in last 7 months($70k+ in total expenses), no local LLMD to treat, and no money to go out of state, not healthy enough to go out of stateh(wasn't even healthy enough to go to local doctors for 1st month), can not tolerate medicines(nasal spray put me in ER), near death experience from going to LLMD to begin with(I would trade the toxic mold building experience with whatever has been going on the last 3 months). Mother's in hospital for last 2 weeks(I had to start staying with my mom after severe reaction 3 months ago).
No wonder women like talking sooooo much... after one time, I feel great now. Time to move on.
-------------------- Never walk through a cornfield backwards.
bejoy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11129
posted
Thanks Vanilla. So much loss and hurt. I'm sorry you had to go through all that.
Thanks Kendrick. Wow, that's a lot loss and pain. I'm sorry you had to deal with all of that.
Yes, talking/writing can be very healing. Health is a coming!
-------------------- bejoy!
"Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Posts: 1918 | From Alive and Well! | Registered: Feb 2007
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Vanilla
Unregistered
posted
Thanks bejoy!
Caroline Myss says to thank those that love us inadequately because they get us closer to God.
I am sorry any of us here have had to go through what we have had to especially with this weird disease but all of what we go through makes us who we are.
Kendrick I am sorry you had so many things happen to you - that does sound like a heck of a lot for you to have to deal with.
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