tricia386
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 29623
posted
Hi All-
I am just feeling so overwhelmed lately. I must say I am about 70% most days. My lyme was triggered by a vaccine (gardasil) Along with a host of other health problems.
I have been treating lyme since Jan. I am still able to work a full time job.
I am just so nervous. How will I know to stop lyme treatment. Then how do I know if I have candida.
how will I know I will get better. How will I know if I relapse. I am so young and I am feeling really scared and overwhelmed.
I am so scared about the "what ifs"
I just get so sad my life ended up like this. I just sit and dwell and dwell. I cause myself the majority if anxiety and depression.
Bc when I feel normal or am havig a good day. Im wondering whats wrong why do I feel okay....yadda yaddda.
I started seeing a phycologosit. She tottally undetstands lyme and the mental part of it. However, we have agreed Im adding in anxiety and depression.
I obess about lyme evertday. Thats all I talk about it. its consumed all my life. Im always looking and searching. I read things and it makes me scared. Then I start to panic...
I guess I am just venting but does anyone else have this problem? Anyone else feel overwhelmed?
-------------------- Lyme activated in April 2010 by gardasil vaccine. DX: Lyme,Babs,Myco,Bart 11/10 Treatment Started: 3/28/11 Posts: 1752 | From Albany, NY | Registered: Dec 2010
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lyme in Putnam
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11561
posted
Your life didn't end up. Your young and can fight this. I wish I knew this when I was your age, we were just told you're nervous, it's a virus. Years later, there's so much knowledge, it's sucks to go through this, but I hate one day at a time, that's what we have. You think about it everyday cause your stuck, OCD is an endless cycle. It's easy to obsess when you're feeling so bad. Have fun on the good days. Take it for wht it is. I hate this everyday, but I'm trying to change it, that's all I can do. It's lie in your own world that everyone is living and your not. You'll catch up to everybody else.
-------------------- He took u to it, He'll you through Posts: 2837 | From NE. | Registered: Apr 2007
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tricia386
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 29623
posted
I think I am causing this OCD though I let it become my obession. it consumes my every thought. And then when I feel like I am fine. i am wondering why I am not thinking about it or why I am not fine!
I am hoping my physcologist can help.
Maybe I should get off the lyme boards.
-------------------- Lyme activated in April 2010 by gardasil vaccine. DX: Lyme,Babs,Myco,Bart 11/10 Treatment Started: 3/28/11 Posts: 1752 | From Albany, NY | Registered: Dec 2010
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lyme in Putnam
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11561
posted
its hard when you feel lousy, looking for a solution. OCD is a cycle caused by anxiety, mine is genetic now wondering me and my sister chronic has been lyme linked all along. You're on treatment. You're not always going to be like this. I loved my life before this happened to me. Stress did me in. Lyme + Stress = relapse, its hard, I know I live it, but what choice do we have. Im mad that I haven't been there for my son mentally the last two years, but I've been there, I try. All you can do is try, you're young and it sux. You will have all these things, but its sick that this is happening. Go out. Im doing that now, just for a while. Symptoms go with you but you're not home. Im ****ed, give it time. You and your loved ones are there for you.
-------------------- He took u to it, He'll you through Posts: 2837 | From NE. | Registered: Apr 2007
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tricia386
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 29623
posted
I know I have created this vicious cycle.
-------------------- Lyme activated in April 2010 by gardasil vaccine. DX: Lyme,Babs,Myco,Bart 11/10 Treatment Started: 3/28/11 Posts: 1752 | From Albany, NY | Registered: Dec 2010
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posted
I was in this cycle when I first got sick. It was horrible and at some point I knew I needed to change. I am not really religious, but I am very spiritual, so I started looking for a way to get my life back.
Somewhere along the line I found an Eckhart Tolle book, "A New Earth", then I read the "Power of Now" and from there I moved on to meditation books. This changed my life, I don't know what dark hole I would be in if I didn't read these books.
It takes time to "retrain' your thoughts and I stil have dark days now and then, but for me this was my saving grace.
*I am in no way associated with the author, I am just saying these books helped me. They are all highlighted, notes are written all over the pages and I still read them, especially during bad times.
I hope you find your saving grace and your peace of mind.
-------------------- Down on her knees, she wept on the floor. This hopeless life, she wanted no more. Dead in the mind and cold to the bone, She opened her eyes and saw she was alone. ~Seether Posts: 427 | From Rhode Island | Registered: May 2011
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lpkayak
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5230
posted
anxiety, depression and ocd can all be caused by lyme. you sound like you are coming down on yourself for having thejm. its not your fault. if your psychologist doesnt understand this they dont really know lyme.
i am worried about you.
there is an excellent lyme counselor in nys and ct. are you seeing a good llmd? are you on tx?
pm me if you want. i will pm you phone number
-------------------- Lyme? Its complicated. Educate yourself. Posts: 13712 | From new england | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
i certainly can relate to your anguish. i agree with so much of the advice here. i wish i could help more, but please know you are in my thoughts and i pray for you to experience peace and health as soon as is humanly possible. all the best, jess
Posts: 651 | From ct | Registered: Sep 2011
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