Topic: Did anyone ever just load up their pickup and drive away,to get away from family that
MADDOG
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 18
posted
Hi Gang I have had it with everything.This house and the payments ,the POA and their bills,fighting Lyme alone and strugling just to take care of me.
Neighbors who builds smokey fires,sit outside drunk and hollering. Thretoning to spray their yard with chems that make me break out in hives and go to the ER.
A mom who just gave up one day and now wants everything done for her. Wont wash,cook ,drive,wants every thing done for her. Wont get a hover round to go to the mail box because she can walk but refuses to.
Expects me to be able to go take her to appointments when i can't drive sometimes myself.Like to get her hair washed 42 mile round trip.
I just want to load up my favorite stuf and drive away abandoning everything.1400 miles west and get a handicaped apartment in Wyoming.
Forget all family,the house I built ,everything!!!! (They are going to kill me if I don't bail out)!!!
Just take care of me!!!!
MADDOG
Posts: 3996 | From Ohio | Registered: Oct 2000
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just don
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 1129
posted
sounds like its float time at the dog ranch.
Take some time off and go enjoy yourself.
West would not be good because of the elevation you had trubs with last time.
Ever been to Canada?? or Northern Mich or Wisc.? Heard fishing is excellent this year
-------------------- just don Posts: 4548 | From Middle of midwest | Registered: May 2001
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posted
UGH... Sorry to hear, MADDOG.. Please stop enabling this woman by taking her to her hair appointment.
--esp if you are not up to it!!--
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96222 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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MADDOG
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 18
posted
The problem is there are nights that I can't sleep,up all the time with interstitial cystitis. And something inside that itches like crazy and i squirm like a worm in a fire.
So the next day I cannot drive without falling asleep at the wheel.I drive and nod off and jerk awake most of the time in time to miss everything.
BUT how can my luck hold out,I have been off the road and not hit anything.
If I get up and I cant drive I don't unless i have promised to take someone to an appointment.
Most of the time my brother in law takes her.But sometimes he cant. She wont stop asking me to.Everytime I have to explain my situation again. Feel like a terrible person all over again,go through this crap.
Don I want to float tuesday it is my birthday,if I can sleep tomorrow night.I have been looking at pictured rocks national lake shore.
MADDOG
Posts: 3996 | From Ohio | Registered: Oct 2000
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lpkayak
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5230
posted
this makes me MADDDDDDD!!!!!
i hope you can just say NO.
yesterday i said no twice. and i feel good about it. the people i said no to are mad. i dont care. it is finally time to put me first.
it is so wrong for them to not understand how sick you are. IC is one of the worst things to go thru.
not sleeping is bad for YOU and all the things wrong with you.
i hope you will be able to say no-and stop promising to take them to appts..esp hair appts!!!its not like it is to ER or LLMD ...
the stress alone will make you worse. its not fair. but you do have to take the responsibility of saying no.
ps-i moved away from them 52 years ago...maybe its easier for me. still..take care of you.
-------------------- Lyme? Its complicated. Educate yourself. Posts: 13712 | From new england | Registered: Feb 2004
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Carol in PA
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 5338
posted
Hmm, you still have the Interstitial Cystitis. For some reason, I thought that got better when you were no longer exposed to the spray painting at work.
Look into d-mannose. The reviews at iHerb.com are great.
Read about Berberine at Wikipedia. Keebler has posted that her IC improved so much with Berberine.
I can give you a link to get a free sample of Berberine.
Posts: 6947 | From Lancaster, PA | Registered: Feb 2004
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GretaM
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Member # 40917
posted
IC is the absolute worst as far as discomfort and inconvenience goes. I really feel badly for you dealing with IC in the summer. D'mannose was a godsend for me. It truly saved me from... Well pretty much losing my mind. And avoiding diet pop and diet drinks. Those irritate my bladder lining.
Don is right-the fishing up here is good. Springs and Pinks and Rainbow Trouts.
Sometimes we need to draw boundaries...lines in the sand we would not have drawn before lyme... It doesn't make us a better or a worse person... Just gives us the potential to enjoy better quality of life while infected.
Best wishes to you.
Posts: 4358 | From British Columbia, Canada | Registered: Jun 2013
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surprise
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Member # 34987
posted
I haven't wanted to get in my pick up truck (minivan) and go, (well, okay, maybe, but) because thank God my little family in this house gets me,
BUT, I have had to learn to say NO. Just this last 2 weeks, to my own father, whom I adore. Because you know what?
Can't do it. Can't handle the stress and the drama. You bet, guilt kicked in. But survivor's instinct won- maybe because I have kids to take care of-
My outside family can be FULL of stress for me. During some treatments, I couldn't even take their phone calls. Literally.
Since saying NO recently to a stress filled event put on me to 'make happen', after I grieved the relationship change, 50 pounds lifted from my shoulders and back.
Honestly, maybe you could move. Could you sell your house? I tell you what: Lyme disease taught me, no-one else will ever put you first. It's a lesson you have to do yourself.
You're worth it. Life is short. Go be in peace. You can still love 'them'. But you can only do what you are capable of-
-------------------- Lyme positive PCR blood, and positive Bartonella henselae Igenex, 2011. low positive Fry biofilm test, 2012. Update 7/16- After extensive treatments, doing okay! Posts: 2518 | From USA | Registered: Nov 2011
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payne
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 26248
posted
Mad dog, vent, vent here where we understand and have compassion for our Lyme friends.. Yes, lift and launch, the world will keep spinning for those you feel worthy to. For you and many of us, when we feel needed we feel worthy..again.
Wish you were sitting next to me with coffee in fishing lawn chair, yea your bobber just went under... (: May The Good Lord help your reaching out in a adventure and a blessing... when I said "NO" you could ve heard a pin drop.. can you ride a motorcycle at all.. ? I want to leave this prison, my home, and just not look back... perhaps someday our trails will meet, UNDERSTOOD, brother in LYME. wayne.
-------------------- TULAREMIA/rabbit fever ? Posts: 1931 | From mid-michigan | Registered: Jun 2010
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lax mom
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 38743
posted
You have the right to say no.
You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else.
posted
After awhile saying 'No' becomes easier. I always felt I had to explain my "No's". I finally realized I didn't owe anyone a reason. Saying "No" is an option that belongs to me. It is a kindness to explain but not a duty. When I say "Yes" it's because I CAN and choose to.
I hope you can find some peace. If you decide to keep taking care of others, you won't be able to do it unless you take care of you.
-------------------- I'm not there yet but I'm closer than I was yesterday.---- Lyme Band 31,41,58. Being treated for Lyme and Bartonella. Posts: 149 | From Maine | Registered: Oct 2010
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posted
Maddog, I hear you. I have severe asthma and two assh-le housemates. One is the house owner and former boyfriend who wants to phone any relationship feelings in. Both guys got their smoker to work and it is sitting on a wooden covered porch that vents to my room upstairs. I've tried reasoning and pitching a fit, but to no avail. Girlfriend says to sabotage smoker. Not sure I have the knowledge. I'll PM you if i can get this to work. People will push your buttons until you say, NO!!!!!
Posts: 482 | From Oregon | Registered: Feb 2011
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just don
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 1129
posted
Whats on your bucket list????
Dont think I will get to my list before I cant any more. Want to drive my grandpas brand new 1950 Dodge
Biggest prob dont have a garage to work in.
BUT dont make the same mistake of waiting too long.
Get started while your young. Where do you WANT to go??What do you WANT to do???
-------------------- just don Posts: 4548 | From Middle of midwest | Registered: May 2001
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payne
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 26248
posted
ALASKA .. there I would die. in peace... 1950 dodge, the one i drove had a push button trans.. like a radio *:
-------------------- TULAREMIA/rabbit fever ? Posts: 1931 | From mid-michigan | Registered: Jun 2010
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linky123
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Member # 19974
posted
How about the beach? I dream about a place on the beach. So peaceful and therapeutic.
-------------------- 'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28 Posts: 2607 | From Hooterville | Registered: Apr 2009
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Dogsandcats
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 28544
posted
Once I learned to say no -nicely- I also learned to leave the room to not hear the guilt part. I speak my peace and exit stage left.
Lost some people, made some people mad...but I also found out those who truly love me for me and accepted me.
It is a bit rough at first, then it gets easier.
I am sorry you are going thru this.
-------------------- God will prepare everything for our perfect happiness in heaven, and if it takes my dog being there, I believe he'll be there.
Billy Graham Posts: 1967 | From California | Registered: Oct 2010
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Keebler
Honored Contributor (25K+ posts)
Member # 12673
posted
- Maddog,
You say: "If I get up and I cant drive I don't unless i have promised to take someone to an appointment." (end quote)
Please, do not even drive then. No matter what, if you feel you cannot drive, don't. Do not. Please.
I know it seems hard to just not commit to taking someone but just don't. For your safety and that of everyone else on the road. All the mothers and fathers, brothers, sisters, sons and daughters out there who deserve only alert drivers at that wheel. Always.
I'm not preaching, really. I understand. It's just not an option to drive drowsy. Ever. For anyone. I know others may not understand when you tell them you can't be counted on to be their transporation, but you have the right to be firm about that. Don't let them manipulate you into dangerous situations.
I do hope you find some peace of mind, somehow, somewhere. -
[ 07-15-2013, 04:24 PM: Message edited by: Keebler ]
Posts: 48021 | From Tree House | Registered: Jul 2007
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MannaMe
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Member # 33330
posted
Hey, I understand - hubby says he'd like to flee to Hawaii to get away from them all! He wants to go far, far, far away!!
Had a run-in with family members again yesterday. Next time they show up, the subject is NOT open to discussion!!
Posts: 2251 | From USA | Registered: Aug 2011
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lpkayak
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5230
posted
a lot of good advice here...for all of us
it sucks that i needed a cancer dx to get strong enough to say no
its ridiculous...cuz the cancer stuff is nothing compared to the last 30 yrs of lyme stuff...
its having lyme that makes the few things i need to do for the cancer hard
i know im supposed to be learnign something from this disease...but sometimes i just wonder how much longer i have to go thru this
i really liked what surprise and sheila said...and also about getting to that bucket list...dont wait too long
-------------------- Lyme? Its complicated. Educate yourself. Posts: 13712 | From new england | Registered: Feb 2004
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Ann-OH
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 2020
posted
Hi Maddog, I hope you can get away. You deserve some time for yourself. Hang in there.... Hugs from Ann - OH
beaches
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Member # 38251
posted
MADDOG I'd like to pack the extended family all up and send THEM somewhere else. Like to the moon or Mars so I could get a long-term break from BS and drama.
I am at a point where I just can't take the stress of dealing with anything beyond what concerns my own little family.
I have always been the "yes" person in the family. I've always put people up in my home, given the family reunions and all the big parties. And I've done all that despite sickness and without complaint.
I've always been THE ONE to bring everyone in the family together. It's funny how NO ONE else in the family ever thought that was so important other than me.
I could go on and on, but this year it finally dawned on me after a great hurt/realization, that I just have to focus on my kids, myself and my husband.
If other "family members" want to get together, they'll have to figure it out for themselves, without me. I'm done in so many ways.
I did say NO to a cousin's request. I thought that was the end of it. But she called me months later and pretty much guilted me into something that was very difficult for me to say no to and to do and I caved.
Never again. Never. I paid the consequences and she will never know or have any appreciation of what I went through doing what she asked me to do.
Thank God for friends because family has NO CLUE.
Posts: 1885 | From here | Registered: Jul 2012
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beaches
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Member # 38251
posted
And FYI keebler is right....Please DO NOT DRIVE if you are not up to it!!!
Please, do not do that. It's just not worth it at all.
Posts: 1885 | From here | Registered: Jul 2012
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linky123
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 19974
posted
When all else fails, we can always escape to lymenet.
-------------------- 'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28 Posts: 2607 | From Hooterville | Registered: Apr 2009
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posted
It's two am and I am about to put on the pot of coffee for those of us who have family/friends/
housemates that drive us crazy. Also, have made large glass jug of ice tea with mint. I don't have
a keurig yet or a full coffee steamer, so, if you are expecting Starschmucks Coffee, you'll have to
go down the street. Yes, escape to the Lymenet Cafe and pull up a chair.
Posts: 482 | From Oregon | Registered: Feb 2011
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poppy
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Member # 5355
posted
Can't load up my pickup because after 17 years I sold it. Too many things needing repair. I miss that truck. It took me to a lot of great places. Got itchy feet now, wanting to go, but IV tying me down. Don't think my family would even notice I was gone. Be relieved probably.
Posts: 2888 | From USA | Registered: Mar 2004
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linky123
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 19974
posted
I had a small pickup, a Chevy S-10 with a camper shell, in my younger days before all this lyme mess.
Could pack everything I owned in it, and traveled many miles in it.
Some of my best memories...
'Starschmucks' - that's funny.
-------------------- 'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28 Posts: 2607 | From Hooterville | Registered: Apr 2009
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lpkayak
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5230
posted
he he...me too. traded my pick up last winter for a small suv and then 4 months later traded that for a smaller pick up than the first one. i guess i just need a truck. cant depend on my legs...need to get where im going.
-------------------- Lyme? Its complicated. Educate yourself. Posts: 13712 | From new england | Registered: Feb 2004
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Annie C
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Member # 14
posted
Hi MADDOG, It's been along time since I've been online here. Due to no internet. You have always been an uplifting person helpping others right where you are now.
And seams like there is no OUT From family... My family are 2000 miles away. My brother said to me the other day "Get a hold of your self" Thems fighting words for me. All I could do is keep crying.
so many of us here have always benefited all of us from you... Just hang on tie another knot and don't let go... I'm selfish and I need you to hang on... In the Name Of Lyme and the only one that can free us and give us peace, we can't see. We can only feel His Love.
And we all know find of what you are going through........... Ain't it great that we have a place here you/we can say exactly what we are going through...
Tell your mom to call Share A Ride or whatever is there for her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been bitten by 3 more tics. One is a Lone Star tic... And my Dr took me off of my Abx... Ill be tested in September... Im P'Od... cause I can recognize the new symptoms... Arrrrgggg and Ouch more pain.
We love you MADDOG Tell your family they are barking up the Wrong Tree... and some
-------------------- May God Bless you every day. And Never say never and do not give up no matter what. We need you to help others. Posts: 1288 | From Tetons Wyoming | Registered: Oct 2000
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MADDOG
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 18
posted
Hi Gang Things sort of settled down,today is good ,I did a bicilin shot yesterday . The weather cooled off and the air is clean for a change.
My brother in law is back to taking mom to get her hair washed,so she doesent have to badger me.
Annie C you have been a member here as long as me that is cool in some ways but sad that we ever got lyme in the first place.Good to hear from you!!!!!Thanks for the incouragement.
MADDOG
Posts: 3996 | From Ohio | Registered: Oct 2000
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Annie C
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Member # 14
posted
Hey MADDOG I was thinking about all the people that have registered and some are no longer posting. What if we all could hold hands how many miles would we be. Plus every one could see us and just maybe they might get the hint of Lyme. It's not a color or JUST A CITY... We are young and old across globe...
But it will never happen... can any one do the math like Hands around the globe...
Yes very glad to hear you are doing better with the family end of Lyme... Yes it's very sad that we are still here fighting for our lives... Also we fight with friends, families, Dr's, Ins.Co.
Maybe we could both get a Job with the CDC, FDA, NFL, GOLF, now I'm just being silly. But this is the best place to be silly, sad, and stupid.
Just keep on barking, they'll hear you...
-------------------- May God Bless you every day. And Never say never and do not give up no matter what. We need you to help others. Posts: 1288 | From Tetons Wyoming | Registered: Oct 2000
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Tincup
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5829
posted
It's Maddog! And Annie too! YES!
Sorry I didn't know you were being run in the ground Maddog! Too bad, for sure! Glad to hear it is better now.
And Annie dear! Why is it those ticks like you (and me) so much? GEEZE! So sorry to hear that!
Don't know where you are getting bitten, but maybe there is something here that can help? I do hope so!
Tincup
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5829
posted
Oh, and yes! To answer your original question... I recently went away for a couple of days, and liked it so much I stayed away for 20 more!
No computer, no cell phone service, no electric, no house cleaning, no responsibilities, no nothing! Just nature all around me. The highlight of my days was watching the sun set in all its glory. It was really delightful.
Hope YOU get to find some peace too. Follow the "V" dear Maddog, follow the "V".
MADDOG
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 18
posted
Were else have you been TC I havent heard from you for awhile.
I was afraid my explanation about the dragon flies My have disgusted you.
I just thought it was so funny figuring out were that american slang came from or about.
Well my escape truck developed a transmission problem.I just did not want to lay under there with trans. fluid dripping in my eyes and musquitos biting me again.
I had it towed to a local shop were it will have to be torn down completly.
I wont be going any were this year to get away from it all no money wil be left after this trans. work.
It will now have a warantee for a year.
Wouldent you know it my other truck needs the injectors cleaned,I cant tear it down till i get the other truck back.I turned up the pump to help keep it going till I get my other truck back.
And the transmission guy went on vacation!!!!! WWWAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MADDOG
Posts: 3996 | From Ohio | Registered: Oct 2000
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