Thanks for your words of encouragement. My daughter is 18 so technically she's not a child.
It's hard to stay far away when only 11 people will be at my in laws house.
Yes I will need luck.
Posts: 911 | Registered: Mar 2005
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steve1906
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 16206
posted
Sorry, but 18 is still a kid, (in mind) I have 4 kids and this has proven true for all.
I also work with undergrads from Harvard, 165 of them. So I interact with this age group every day, and in my opinion 18 is still a child.
Go to the gathering, have fun, let your daughter have fun. Don't involve her with all the nasty stuff...
Steve
-------------------- Everything I say is just my opinion! Posts: 3529 | From Massachusetts Boston Area | Registered: Jul 2008
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GretaM
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 40917
posted
I hate to suggest this...
But if you go, I would take a sedative beforehand. Ativan or similar.
If you don't go, there will be another thing they will hold against you.
I do not have very sound advice today. I am wound up myself.
I just want to scream.
But I think Steve has some good points.
Posts: 4358 | From British Columbia, Canada | Registered: Jun 2013
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
I'm with greta. for God's sake stay home. i've gone to so many of his where I end up sitting in a corner alone while everyone fawns over his ex, I could scream.
i'm tired of the snarky "how's the diet going" comments and all. his son's third wife spends all her time sucking up to her mil and his grandmother.
they could care less if I'm there and it's obvious.
I get physically sick and it's a yelling match coming and going.
looks like i'm going to have to go to ohio and i'm dreading it.
nope, I say stay away and save your health.
-------------------- do not look back when the only course is forward Posts: 12262 | From texas | Registered: Mar 2007
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steve1906
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 16206
posted
It's not about us, it's about our kids, (and holidays) let them enjoy the holidays.
It's only a couple a hours, and you should work together with your husband to make sure all goes well.
Steve
-------------------- Everything I say is just my opinion! Posts: 3529 | From Massachusetts Boston Area | Registered: Jul 2008
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
Better that the kids enjoy themselves instead of knowing you are there completely miserable.
When I did go they they said well why didn't you just stay home. We would have all been happier.
Aint changing my mind hon. Been through it too many times.
and yes husband has two kids, grown now. but even now they ignore. husband admitted one year nobody even asked about me.
She said she thanked us at the shower...uh NO you didn't.
What she quoted to me she said at the shower was in her thank you note.
She reminded me a lot of my ex h who could look so honest, twist the truth and lie.
I believe that's called crazy making.
Tried to accuse us of not being able to go to her rehearsal dinner even though our flight was delayed from Nashville.
Since I have an Iphone, the picture D18 took from the plane showed the date, time and the plane clearly said Southwest.
I asked her why she didn't invite her brother to the present opening ceremony and she said she didn't think we were coming to the Wedding.
Well she knew good and well her brother was attending.
No I don't feel any better about the situation. As all of you said, I will get no where.
Now it's time to stay away and avoid avoid avoid.
Posts: 911 | Registered: Mar 2005
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LisaK
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 41384
posted
to your original post at top of this thread: a similar thing happened with us and my husband's sister's family. they started a war with us. we told them our side and they still sided with an almost stranger.
my FIL begged us to al make up and be back to normal. SIL and family wouldn't budge. so *I* called her an d told her that for her father's sake (a very ill terminally ill man) we were going to tell FIL that it is worked out . then still go to family funcitons , etc and pretend for his sake and the sake of the entire family.
that was couple yrs ago.
now, things have gotten worse and that crazy, finger pointing, blaming SIL family (mostly 20 yr old daughter) caused more riffs and now my 20 yr old is vowed to stay away forever.
can't say I blame her. and I also told my husband I don't ever want to be around them ever again at familiy functions. but I now think, after a couple months, that I will be willing to go for my husband's sake only, for a very short visit to any inlaw's home. I do not want to see them really or have me kids around them, Steve, because they are wicked, kniviing, gossipers that have no God in their lives and can lead my children to great sin! and sadly, they already have I am sure.
I tried . I tried my best to make a difference, but I need to back off form that side . they are toxic and I cannot deal with all that drama any more.
-------------------- Be thankful in all things- even difficult times and sickness and trials - because there is something GOOD to be seen Posts: 3558 | From Eastern USA | Registered: Jul 2013
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