Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Hi there <<<<< LymeNet Family, and Bartenderbonnie on Isolation Issues >>>>>,
I wanted to start this topic, because my question is a bit different, w/in the isolation issues.
Does anyone, have an issue,of not being able to edit, and feeling like they are droning on and on?
We,TrekC' and I are alone here at home a lot,and I find myself jabbering on and on, same way if I am typing.
There are times,when my head hurts,and I ache, and as odd as it may sound... I wish I could just get to the point, and then just be quiet. I wonder if I talk in my sleep even.
I get lonely from not being able to get out, very often. TrekC' tries to help, by listening to me,and letting me talk.
As I jabber along, I find myself searching for words, and trying to remember how to do simple things, like how to shut down my computer and so on. Things I do daily.
Does the isolation, tiredness and illness make any of y'all just talk on and on even when you just want to relax? Sometimes I am frustrated with my own self.
Jus' Silverwolfi here
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Jus' Silverwolfi here,
Wow, I was really hoping that someone here might have had a similar issue. I know it is an individualistic disease set.
Just tired of feeling like I can't communicate, can't do anything right, say the wrong thing, talk,type, write too much.
Or don't jump into a conversation when I should,I was once accused of acting as tho' I tho't I was to good for others.
Because I was taught you don't jump into the middle of a conversation. If one jumped into the conversation w/o being invited it was rude.
I've been told that I am not answering the question I was asked, or not answering the right question. That I ask to many questions,and they are to difficult to answer...and on and on.
Since I was a child,I've been told I talked to much, could talk the legs of a donkey. And if i then tried to be quiet,just play quietly and so on. I was to quiet,and must be up to something.
And now,the Doctors[ yeah then non LL's ], just excuse me as a patient one after another , they can't help me...
Talk about feeling isolated... so what do I do...??? I don't know anymore...
Jus' Silverwolfi
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
oh yeah hon. that's why I prefer to be alone.
sad thing is when I do go out, I find myself rambling on and on. I can't seem to shut up. then I go home and go "oh man, why did I say those things. I sounded like an idiot. I'm so embarrassed. geez"
even my husband will say "you're rambling."
so I prefer to be alone. like I said, there's lonely and being alone.
lyme has jus devastated my self confidence.
people ask but they really don't want to know. only here do people really understand. no raised eyebrows, no long sighs, no well gotta go.
nope alone is it. I truly understand.
-------------------- do not look back when the only course is forward Posts: 12262 | From texas | Registered: Mar 2007
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Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Hi <<<<< randibear >>>>>,
Thanks for the reply, I figured there had to be others that are going thru this type of issue.
I need to be alone at times, but I also need to have company, but it is hard, I feel like I am not understandable, and then I am so tired I wonder if it is worth reaching out.
Lyme and co's are thieves for certain. Thanks again for the reply!
Jus' Silverwolfi
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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Bartenderbonnie
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 49177
posted
I find myself talking chit-chat with strangers in stores. Weather, local sports teams, advice on products, ect. I think it's nerves.
I also noticed I was intterupting people. Not cool. So now I apologize upfront. I explain I have no short term memory and if I don't say what I mean when the thought appears, it disappears. And if it disappears, it drives me nuts trying to recall what exactly I was trying to convey.
I sometimes wonder what a room full of lymmies would look like to the "normals".
Posts: 2977 | From Florida | Registered: Nov 2016
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
verbal diahrrea...yep that's me...
-------------------- do not look back when the only course is forward Posts: 12262 | From texas | Registered: Mar 2007
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Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
<<<<< Bartenderbonnie,and randibear >>>>>,
Hi there Bartender', well I am relieved that it isn't just me,but sad that y'all are having this issue.
And it is embarrassing, I like the idea if I need to talk to someone, just explain in advance and apologize. Thank You!!!
Randibear, yeah I've been accused of 'verbal diahrrea too.
I bet we'd look really odd to the 'normals',especially since ,I know I walk into walls and closed doors, and trip over invisible dust bunnies and such like.
And I've been known to trip and turn both ankles in the same day,and have to where braces on both ankles and my wrist.
I've learned to be really careful about talking when I'm walking. Perhaps the one time I can stop flapping my gums for a couple minutes.
Sorry y'all have this too, but it's good to know we are understood here!
Jus' Silverwolfi here
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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posted
I have this more with writing than with talking now. And it's definitely about short-term memory.
The end of each line is like jumping off a cliff! I can't "see" in my mind what just happened, so then it's Groundhog Day again and it just repeats again. This to me is definitely due to some kind of brain damage from Lyme.
So I find myself writing long rambling emails or posts and then I just delete them, because they don't even make sense to me.
I also am way more self-critical about things I say after the fact, so I'm afraid to say anything now, as I just don't trust my brain.
(breaking up the post for easier reading for many here)
Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Hi there <<<<< BartHeart >>>>>,
And Welcome to LymeNet, this group understands what LD and Co's do to our brains.Many of us, lose what self confidence we may have had.
It's like if everything in our brain doesn't come out in words or on paper/laptop/phone etc. immediately, we'll forget what we were trying to say,
...and often do in the midst of what we are saying/typing texting anyhow. So we are over explaining, repeating ourselves, and so on.
My brain often substitutes other words,and annoys me, like 'self consciousness' instead of 'self confidence'. And then that does make one 'self conscious'.
For me, I also capitalize words at odd times, I took German in high school,and they capitalize nouns a lot. It is some better now, but not always.
And when I am blatting away typing, I sometimes leave a letter off a word, which can be funny ,or not. As an example, I once left the 'n' off the shortened word 'Hon'... '.
I told someone I'm a prayin' Hon' [minus the 'n', luckily I caught it and edited.
Gotta wander on...
Jus' Silverwolfi here
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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posted
I can totally relate .. I would ramble here if it weren't for my bad shoulder and pain in hands and neck. It all keeps me from rambling too much!
At home I don't talk a lot. All men think women ramble .. let's face it! We DO talk more than MOST men.
I DO find myself interrupting people .. and yes, because I will forget what I wanted to say. I have to apologize and also remind myself that if I can't get my say NO ONE will miss it!! HA!!
I think we also tend toward OCD in some things, so that plays a role too.
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96222 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
oh yeah ocd...yep and add and a couple other things thrown in fer sure.
add senility and you've got a mixed up mess.
I literally jus go "huh" and "oh yeah"....that covers most of it.
my husband has jus given up. adult conversation is not possible anymore.
-------------------- do not look back when the only course is forward Posts: 12262 | From texas | Registered: Mar 2007
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MADDOG
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 18
posted
I just can't shut up!!! I get my foot stuck in my mouth all the time.
Even a close friend gets tired of it sometimes.
Must be the isolation,and living alone.
MADDOG
Posts: 3996 | From Ohio | Registered: Oct 2000
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Tincup
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5829
posted
I am sorry when anyone feels lonely. It has to hurt.
Maybe doing something once in a while that you enjoy so you can meet and speak to others would help?
There may be bingo games at a local fire department or VFW, or church functions, or volunteer to help with boy scout projects, or history society meetings to attend, or garden club events, or knitting groups, or art classes, or library functions, book readings, etc. that you can attend when you are feeling well enough. No commitments either, so that is good.
I have an "adventure" each time I go to the grocery store. Sometimes the people there are the only ones I see or speak to in person for 2-3 weeks at a time so I try to make the most of "socializing".
Any more than that is too much for me. Having been a very social and friendly person all of my life who'd talk to a cat strolling down the street, I just can't do it anymore.
I hope that your situation improves. You deserve better.
Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Hi there <<<<< Lymetoo ,randi',MADDOG ,and Tinny' >>>>>,
I am glad to know that I'm not the only one to have issues like this ,but sad that we all have to go thru this mess.
It is a frustration, I cannot text,and most folks where we live don't use the phone for calling, they text. I cannot hear very well, even with the hearing aids either.
And right now, I cannot get out of the house, so I really feel isolated, and I jabber on and on. Both in writing/typing and in talking.
I know there is the OCD factor too,as you say Lymetoo. I place certain things, in certain places every night for instance, And I double check door locks.
But I forget things easily too, so heaven help me if I put something important 'where it is safe, so I can find it again...' Likely I'd lose it but good.
I want to feel well enough to get out, to church,or for a walk, before it gets too hot again, but right now I can not. And if it gets cold and windy, that's worse.
Between LD and Co's and all the other health issues, I don't like this isolation feeling. I try to concentrate on things I can still do,like a load of clothes now and then.
As to talking... a lot, I even talk back to the TV. TrekC' and I laugh at each other for talking to the TV, cause they can't hear us.
I think TrekC' talks... ,a bunch,for both of us, when he is out, on the phone, or texting. And especially at church, he makes choir laugh,and sometimes Pastor too.
[ I'd at least like to be able to get to church or the grocery store now and again.] I'm figuratively stomping my Wolfi paws, 'cause it gets to me not to be able to go anywhere.
And ,I hear ya MADDOG,about putting your foot in your mouth. When I do get out, I have to watch it, so I don't say the wrong thing, while I jabber and blat away.
I am having trouble with tendonitis right now, so I have to be careful, as sometimes, I chat away here until my wrist gets swollen.
I better stop for a bit... Jus' Silverwolfi here
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
my mom always said I could talk a fence post to a stub.....
-------------------- do not look back when the only course is forward Posts: 12262 | From texas | Registered: Mar 2007
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Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Hi <<<<< randi' >>>>>,
Yep, I hear ya! Adding these phrases: Wolfi' You could talk the legs off a donkey,
... and Wolfi' *your Low Dutch is showing...* from Maternal Gramma' *[meaning your jabberin' and I can't understand you,or you're talking too fast, a saying in our family when we were little. ].
I like yours tho': "[you] could talk a fence post to a stub .". LOL ,That made Trekc' and I both laugh, outloud, and we could use the humor right now.
Jus' Silverwolfi
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
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randibear
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11290
posted
oh I have a ton of sayings. my parents were raised in the back "hollers" of Kentucky and Tennessee so I'm basically a hillbilly and Lord, children, we say what we mean.
it's basically a whole nother language....lol
-------------------- do not look back when the only course is forward Posts: 12262 | From texas | Registered: Mar 2007
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MADDOG
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 18
posted
TC You could always bring small marshmallows and put them in your ears.
HE HE HE HE !!!
Posts: 3996 | From Ohio | Registered: Oct 2000
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,That made Trekc' and I both laugh, outloud, and we could use the humor right now.
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