This is topic Missing post on LymeNet organization in forum Medical Questions at LymeNet Flash.

To visit this topic, use this URL:

Posted by WildCondor (Member # 434) on :
Where did the post about the organization of LymeNet go with the voting? I was using that to help organize these links,but now it has mysteriously vanished. There was a ton of valuable input contained in it. ????
Posted by bettyg (Member # 6147) on :

it was there 30-60 minutes ago as i made 2 posts on it saying how very impressed i was with all the good suggestions folks were coming up with.

i put a special note on there saying i was going to send you something else for it that needed to be addressed that i sent jenifer 2-3 wks. ago, and then sent it before i forgot.

i also thanked jenifer for editing/deleting a few more bashing notes on me.

so i'm shocked it's totally gone with ALL the good suggestions on it! glad you are asking.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Wow, it is gone. I thought one of the moderators said she was going to move it to General Support, but it's not there either.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
I just reported this topic to the moderators to hopefully find out what happened to it.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
I reported it to one of the moderators, too, after looking all over the place only to find that it no longer exists after doing a search.

There was lots of valuable information on that post and many members expressed concerns and issues that they are having about Lymenet in general and being new and how to find help better.

I'm not pleased at all that it has been removed and I think this has gone beyond censorship and is interfering with our member's ability to safely voice their opinions.

If there were concerns about "bashing" and much of what was said was correct but could have been expressed in a more diplomatic way, the posts could have been handled on an as needed basis.

I for one am extremely incensed that the post was eliminated, as the changes discussed need to be made to organize this board better and make it a more friendly environment for everyone so they can feel free to use this forum and not feel intimidated by arbitrary rules that are not part of the general terms and conditions of using this site.

Hopefully we will get an explanation from the moderators and hopefully they read and took into consideration all that was expressed, even if it was expressed in a manner that did not comply with "Lymenet" rules. Much of the concerns were valid and need correcting, whether or not it was considered "bashing"!
Posted by seekhelp (Member # 15067) on :
I want to know what happened to the post about Dr S' free Babesia supplement book?
Posted by sixgoofykids (Member # 11141) on :
Seek, here is Dr. S's babesia book thread.

The other is gone. I didn't hear anything about it being moved or deleted. After the hours the moderators put into editing it, I can't imagine who deleted it, maybe the original poster?
Posted by seekhelp (Member # 15067) on :
Cool thanks Six. It got moved and appropriately so. I know the author is controversial, but I didn't want anyone to lose a chance to get any free info. [Smile]
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
I did a search and it does not appear to exist any longer from what I can tell.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
I don't assume it was deliberately deleted. More likely a bug. But even if it was deleted, a copy should still exist somewhere.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
James I don't agree with your assessment and even if you were wearing your "bell boy uniform" I still would not be swayed.

It appears that the powers that be don't like when we express our opinions any descent from the official line gets axed.

We all need to open our eyes here. Sometimes there is way more going on than meets the eye.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Are you saying that Big Brother deleted our post because of the dangers of free thinking? Wow.

Aren't "we" the participants in lymenet actually "the powers that be"? Or am I being naive?

If someone arbitrarily deleted that topic because they just felt like it, I would be surprised--and very disappointed.

Still, it should exist somewhere on some server.

If worst comes to worst, we'll have to restart it.

(Unless they've deleted it from my brain too!) [Eek!]
Posted by sixgoofykids (Member # 11141) on :
Abxnomore, Jenifer spent hours editing it and it was still here when she was finished just as BettyG stated above. Since Jenifer is the "powers that be" I think it's safe to say that your theory is not correct. I do not know who deleted it or whether it was deliberate. There is no "official line" here other than Lymenet rules.

Unfortunately, deleted threads/posts are not saved unless someone copied it before it was deleted, which we as mods have been instructed to do.
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
i'm sorry gang but this po's me big time.

we had (or at least me) started to work on a project that apparently offended SOMEBODY and now it just miracously disappears!!!!!

did the moderators think some of the comments were over the top and the whole thing needed to be stopped???

sorry, i'm mad.....
Posted by sixgoofykids (Member # 11141) on :
I have an email in to the other moderators to find out what happened to the thread. We know about it, so no need to report it again. We will let you know what we find out.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Who would have been offended? I mean, there was nothing "threatening" in the topic.

And Jennifer worked so hard on it.

I think we should not get angry until we find out the facts. If it was some bug (spirochete?) it's annoying but these things happen.

Hmmmm, maybe the servers were protected from a virus, but NOT from a Bb spirochete sent to try and foil our efforts??? [Smile]
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
sixgoofykids I contacted Jenifer early this morning with a very long email expressing my opinion about the fact that the post was deleted.

The powers that be are the "moderators" who decide what stays and what does not. I know the rules of the forum and also that once a post is deleted it is gone for good.

The topic no longer exists as revealed by a search and I highly doubt it disappeared by way of its own volition or due to a technical problem.

I hope someone has a really good explanation for this and I hope all of the moderators read every single post whether or not it contained "bashing", so you can get a good read about how many feel about what has been taking place on this forum.

Many are not happy and it was clearly articulated in that 150 plus post, despite all the editing that took place.
Posted by TerryK (Member # 8552) on :
Has anyone bothered to ask TinCup if she deleted it since she is the original poster which means she has the ability to delete it?
Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
Hi All

In the past if post is deleted It still is in the list of past posts (suck as your profile) and when you ciick on the name of it it will say "this post no longer exists"

I do not see the topic even in the past lists. That is odd?

If what happened has to do with speaking out and it not being in an "approved" or "appropriated" as perceived this forums powers of be....

I apologize for being part of that. And for the valuable information being lost.

I realize I was one that went direct to some points that others are reluctant to and even so others did agree plenty and sent me a ton Of pms and also some posted on the thread too..

If nothing else. I hope that the response brings around some new and better changes.. We always can improve. Each and everyone of us.

James.. and Abxnomore.. Thanks for putting in the humor.. I got some good chuckles from you two

YOUR Hilarious... hehehe.

Got to keep the humor in everything...

Thanks.. again.. : )
Posted by sixgoofykids (Member # 11141) on :
Abxnomore, we went through the thread, read every post, and deleted some comments that were bashing other members. We were instructed to keep an eye on it in case there was further bashing. The mods who posted in the thread, including Jenifer, were all very supportive of what was being discussed. The only concern was bashing and that was handled on a post by post basis.

Like I have said before, we just have to wait to hear back from all involved, and as Terry mentioned, even Tincup.

I am closing this topic until we know more to keep the speculation from escalating. We will reopen it when we have further information.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
TinCup does not enable her PMs, however I highly doubt she would given that her idea was a good one and there was huge support for her suggestion.

I'm sure we will hear from her.

Last post I saw before signing off last night was your post Terry rehashing stuff that was behind us. We were in the constructive phase of putting things in motion.

I did notice a lot of whining on someone else's post about more editing that needed to be done in an effort to sanitize everything.
Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :
Hey ho...

MY fault! I'm to blame! Kick me here...


As we were sharing our ideas on that post, individual entries were being deleted and/or edited almost as fast as they were being posted.

They were edited past what I thought was reasonable ... and it was due to multiple complaints from one person.

I don't think it is right to cater to just one person on a public board (to the exclusion of all other opinions- as long as personal attacks are not involved)...

And being the stick in the mud that I am about being fair...

Rather than watch our work get further chopped to pieces or totally wiped out (it was headed in that direction)... or hang around and argue about it...

I deleted it.


I saved the original posts before I hit my delete button.

Unfortunately, it was not until after the last editing job last night, so much had already been lost. Sorry I didn't think to do it sooner.

I sent a copy of what was left to WC late last night so she could continue her work without concerns of losing the entire topic to more editing. Keep in mind...

Some folks were already complaining on that post about the previous deletions and editing that had already been done .. and one was gloating about their part in it ...

And it wouldn't have been long before a scuffle occurred.

If anyone who had been contributing to this post already.... and who will be working on the development of the Links page... would like a copy of what was left, please email me.

[email protected]

And if you don't like what I did or why I did it...



Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
I don't think you should close this topic. You can't keep cutting us off from expressing our opinions.

Is lymenet going to become a police state more than it has been?
Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :
BTW- Sorry.. last night no one seemed overly concerned.

By the time I saw this was gaining interest this morning (morning to me) and replied.. 10 more posts were added.

Didn't mean to keep you waiting... not at all.

[Big Grin]

And I forgot.. did we decide Bell Boys were better than the Ski Instructors... or not?

Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :
On my way out to a doc's appointment... so will come back and take my lashings later tonight.

[Big Grin]
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
Most of us know why and who was behind all the editing, whining and complaining. We are all grownups here and should be able to take some criticism and look at our own behavior to see if may be it needs some adjusting for the greater good.

I'm sorry but hurt feelings need to be dealt with on an individual basis and not in the context of Lymenet. We need to demonstrate adult objective behavior.

That is mostly where a lot of the anger that was expressed in that post came from. It ended up serving a dual purpose from those who have been frustrated for a very long time.

We don't need an unofficial big brother hovering around the site and breathing down our necks making suggestions no matter how helpful that person thinks it is. We have moderators for that purpose, to step in when needed when Lymenet rules are being violated but we don't need unofficial people making up rules and enforcing them.

This forum can no longer be run to keep one person happy to the exclusion of others. Lymenet is for all of us and it has to stop. We all contribute in our own way and it doesn't matter if someone spends more time doing so. They don't get more sympathy for it.

I saved a lot of the last post before it went to the chopping block, if anyone wants it but it's not complete.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
TinCup, I don't think anyone will be mad at you.

You're actions represent a person who possesses integrity and I would have done the same thing.
Posted by cantgiveupyet (Member # 8165) on :
What I have learned over the last few months from this and other lyme anytime you have important info that you have posted...SAVE all posts. I now do this with anything I post publicly that I wish to save after having a lot of my info vanish on another forum. I know all too well the frustrations this causes.

Just saw Tincup post..

.but what I said above I would suggest everyone on here start doing...SAVE all posts that you want to keep as a reference.
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
tincup, honey, i think we better get out the tar and feathers....

better yet, i'm going to send you a box of chocolate...

or i'll make you sit and listen to me for hours. and with my drawl you're gonna be realllll sorry...

honestly tho, i appreciate your integrity and concern for everyone.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
Well said Randi and I'd like to see the other players here show the same integrity.

This is a public forum that is supposed to offer help to those who need it. Check your ego at the door when you enter and if you take it upon yourself to get very active on the site be an

adult about it and know there will be times where not everyone will agree with you and that change is a constant part of life.

No whining when we can't have our way; think about the public good and take the emotional baggage to the proper place but it's not to be dumped here.
Posted by Keebler (Member # 12673) on :
I have tried to stay out of this but, with the declaration of "integrity" lopped about, it's important to note that it is just the opposite of integrity, actually.

These threads have created a toxic environment. Bullying, passive-aggressive bashing and conniving - all still happening and no one seems to recognize that. Words written in several posts above are very clear regarding intent and it's unfair.

The fact that someone wanted attacks at them removed to be considered wrong - well, that's wrong. Of course they have the right to have negative things about them removed.

Very sad. This has turned into a soap opera of "Mean Girls"

My comments are merely in response to behavior that I see as disparaging and hurtful to others. If you can't say something nice about someone, don't say anything at all.

I've considered staying away totally and that would please many here, I know. But whether or not I leave because this all turns my stomach, please stop the attacks. Please step back and detoxify this situation. Getting by with words that technically may not be an attack but are certainly intended to toss a barb - that is just mean.

This picky behavior is uncalled for and very unprofessional. It is hurtful to the ideals of education and fellowship that LymeNet has been built upon.
Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
If what we want to talk about happens to be a subject that ends up being connected to a certain person or people that does not make it a personal attack.

Now people are feeling as if they can not speak their mind if it might be connected to someones actions that affects this forum and the people who come here or the subject at hand.

Someone might want to say.. to FRANK. "I do not like the ideas you presented for the new format. I think that there is an element of welcoming the people still missing in the outline or new ideas."
THAT does not mean there is an Attack on FRANK.

So for me this seems to be that there are certain people who are seemingly off limits to include in any discussions that are about improving the site and the welcoming of new people, whether it be format and tone or technique.?

This is really crossing the line of freedom of speech and opinion and will stifle the progress and collaboration that it takes of all opinions that takes things forward and makes them better.


I had posted this yesterday but.. when it comes to edits or deletions by moderators is there any policy to notify the poster. Not for any back and forth about it but so they know what the did wrong for the future?
Posted by seekhelp (Member # 15067) on :
Uh oh, I'm anticipating the thread about why another topic was deleted will soon be deleted itself. [Smile]
Posted by Keebler (Member # 12673) on :
It 's important to step back with honesty and assess the intent of one's comments. That makes a huge difference. The intent here is all too frequently to hit and hurt, not to have a honest discussion based on mutual respect. A thin veil is often used to hide hurtful comments.

It's not "discussion" that is off-limits, it's the hurtful manner in which it has been conducted on these threads that is so sad. Intent and attitude shine through and that is what makes all the difference.

If from a loving heart, questions and discussion can be great. If from a mean or toxic heart - with even the slightest twist - the same words can destroy. And those who are experienced with this method may not even be aware of it (or they may well be aware and still do it intentionally).

I'm asking not just to be mindful of words but also to be clear of intention in all the layers of communication.

[ 11-04-2009, 04:19 PM: Message edited by: Keebler ]
Posted by bigstan (Member # 11699) on :
"Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our Lyme lives." [Smile]
Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
There has been NO intent to hurt anyone.

Why would you actually come out and insinuate that the things said have been said with intention to HURT someone else.

That is really wrong.

That was NOT my or anyones intent at all.

But by speaking up about how I felt about how new people were approached it happens to have been connected to a certain person who I feel has trouble with it.

But i would have said it NO matter who it was connected to.

So to say There was INTENT> Thats a bunch of bull.

That is going way overboard here.

I have not seen A SINGLE Person here would would or does or wants to HURT anyone intentionally.

I think you should retract your statement.. ..

Or you can just call me a liar.

Or you can believe it.

Your choice Keebler.

Oh by the way.> I do not feel hurt by your statment. Just angry that and also defensive other others who spoke out but are very much trying NOT to hurt anyones feelings.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Yes, we should all be mindful to not hurt each other's feelings. BUT these things happen. People can come across the wrong way in a post or email. One can be in a bad mood, or just excited, etc.

We don't need a "Mommy" to regulate most discussion. If there is a bit of a flame battle, we, the community can work it out.

If someone is way, way out of hand and destructive then they can be banned.

We're adults, we can handle the small squabbles that occur.

Sure, some feelings were hurt in that post, but look at how quickly it was realized and amends and apologies made.

If someone doesn't like someone else's attitude, they should be free to call them on it. Let the discussion of ideas happen naturally. I think we know where the boundary of "too much" is without parental help.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
James, I can't PM you. Your box is full. Stop trying on those bell boy outfits and clear out your in box..... [Big Grin]

But to answer your question about that supposed LLMD, I have not been able to get thru to his office yet.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
I don't see any intent to intentionally hurt anyone here but to bring out in the open opinions and changes that need to be made to better serve "everyone" in our membership.

We are all grownups here and if we are going to take an extra active role on the site, as I do in seeking, then all of us who do are subject to constructive criticism and must accept what the

majority of the membership desires even we ourselves don't necessarily agree with it. We have to leave the hurt feelings behind and be objective about these things.

A change in procedure should not be viewed as an personal attack, not matter how much time someone has put into a project, if improvements will better serve the community.

It's called learning to work together with each on an equal footing. We are not IBM but all volunteers. It's also known as team work.
Posted by TerryK (Member # 8552) on :
I agree with Keebler. She put into words a lot of what I was thinking and feeling.

If you feel your point of view is valid, why not talk about that rather than making comments that are intended to tear others down. Your point will not get lost or deleted if you can learn to post without attacking others.

abx wrote:
This is a public forum that is supposed to offer help to those who need it.

This is not a public forum. It is privately owned. We are not "entitled" to post here, it is a privilege. They can do whatever they want since they own this forum.

Offering help to others does not exclude the need for good manners. A little kindness goes a long way.

Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
We are dealing with semantics here. Yes, it is privately owned but it's purpose is meant to serve the public and yes we do have to join to participate.

I know about kindness. I have not had Lyme for many years but I'm mainly here to help.

I help in "seeking" all day long, for the sole purpose of helping. I am kind to all posters who are requesting LLMDs and go out of my way to help.

I get many PM's thanking me every day and PM's from the membership asking me for my thoughts.

I don't venture into medical much but if there is a question I can answer, I do so. I do my part and I treat people nicely.
Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
There are other ways to resolve issues when dialoge is not moving freely..

Sometimes you just have to put up a vote.

There are two main subjects that ended up coming out of the one posted.

Maybe someone can put up a poll with a YES or NO and just count it up.

ONE might say.. Do you feel that the Stickies and Site organization could be improved on to be better accessed and consolidated as well as make it easier for users and for the people providing the information or welcoming new people and pointing to information resources.

TWO might say.. Do you feel that we should or can improve on our welcoming procedures to make people feel more at ease and "welcomed".

Just examples.. I am SURE It can be better worded ..

JUST an IDEA>...

When the votes come in then the process can move to what to do and how to do it and collaboration of ideas to accomplish it.

That would be great to wind forward to that point and put all this other stuff behind..

Just an idea..

Good Luck..
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Wow, I have been really off the mark! LOL

I think almost everyone I thought was a man is a woman, and women are men! Those non-gender handles are really interesting. LOL
Posted by TerryK (Member # 8552) on :
I didn't see your post before I posted.

In your last post you wrote:

"I don't see any intent to intentionally hurt anyone here but to bring out in the open opinions and changes that need to be made to better serve "everyone" in our membership."

Let me point out just a few things that could be viewed as hurtful.

"Well said Randi and I'd like to see the other players here show the same integrity."

Certain others here don't have integrity.

"No whining when we can't have our way; think about the public good and take the emotional baggage to the proper place but it's not to be dumped here."

Your feelings don't matter. You are just whining because you can't have your way. You don't care about the public good. Your problem is your own emotional baggage.

"Most of us know why and who was behind all the editing, whining and complaining. We are all grownups here and should be able to take some criticism and look at our own behavior to see if may be it needs some adjusting for the greater good."

This clearly points out one person.

That person is a whiner and complainer who had no right to have feelings about what we posted about them. Their inability to be a grown up and take a little criticism is selfish and not good for the lyme community.

"I'm sorry but hurt feelings need to be dealt with on an individual basis and not in the context of Lymenet. We need to demonstrate adult objective behavior."

Those whose feelings are hurt should not voice this fact at lymenet but deal with it themselves. They are not acting like adults.

"I for one am extremely incensed that the post was eliminated, as the changes discussed need to be made to organize this board better and make it a more friendly environment for everyone so they can feel free to use this forum and not feel intimidated by arbitrary rules that are not part of the general terms and conditions of using this site."

The person who requests specific accomadations so that they and others with the same problem can read a post are just making up arbitrary rules for no good reason. They have no right to ask for any special accomations that they might need because of the neurological damage that they have suffered due to lyme.

I'm sure I could find more but hopefully you will be able to objectively look at your comments and see how they would be interpreted as hurtful AND how these kind of comments very much contribute to the need for a post to be removed.

Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
Terry I don't see your post as helpful and it only serves to stir up feelings.

We are entitled to say what we feel and there was no direct bashing but an expression of opinion.

I have a very clear picture of what has taken place here and I don't need an education regarding it.

If fact, I am directly involved in the comings and goings in "seeking a doctor" and communications from that group who volunteers, being on their email list.

Have you read TinCup's post? I'm not getting into details but we would not be having this discussion, if there were not some problems to work out and not just organizational ones.

Your post will only serve to incite people and start a non -stop rant by micro analyzing every sentence.

I don't see your post as being constructive at all nor do I see the need for you to take a position of superiority to point out what you feel are indiscretions.

We can leave that to the moderators, however, I don't see any violations of Lymenet rules.

Everyone can speak up for themselves. No one needs a fall back guy to do it for them.

I might add that your entire message has been discussed ad infinitum in the post that was removed and has been saved by TinCup, so that the changes discussed can be worked on and put into place.

I really don't see the need to digress, as you did in your post.

Have you read the reasons why TinCup removed her post? This post is dealing with that issue.
Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
Anyone can pick and choose sentences from here and there and make them serve their purpose.

You have to keep in mind the whole picture and the theme and ideas of what someone is trying to say..

I think that wss an underhanded way to represent someone in a light that they do not represent.
Posted by feelfit (Member # 12770) on :
Bigstan! I am agreeing with you again and liking you more and more with each passing post [Wink]
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
i thought everyone knew i was a female!!!!
Posted by WildCondor (Member # 434) on :
LymeNet needs leadership.

Things here are a mess. LymeNet has a responsibility to provide the best information on Lyme and do it in an organized manner. Right now it is chaos! Sick people are lost in a sea of confusion with users telling them what to do, how to post, blah has to stop!

When I saw the post deleted, and did not know that TinCup had done it, I was ready to quit the entire thing for good. I just assumed, like many of the rest of you, that it had been deleted. That's because so many important posts are deleted here without warning or reason, or because of censorship.

There is a huge lack of respect here for peoples hard work. Everyone has their limit. I know TC did it for other reasons, but alot of hard work went into it and others should be able to see it. Moderators were not doing their job deleting the off topic posts and bashing ones mixed in between the point of the subject.

Look at the current Links page on LymeNet, most of them are dead links and have been there for quite some time. Why is nobody in charge updating these things? I offered to help but who is to say that when I submit my work it won't be deleted, misplaced, or lost in the sea of confusion.

The censorship is really out of control. Valuable information that we spend many hours contributing is lost, and for what? So feelings are not hurt? Because people complain? Check your emotions at the door when it comes to some topics folks, we are supposed to be here to save lives and tell it like it is. Fed up and disappointed over here.
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
I agree with Condor. When I help in "seeking" it is an embarrassment to refer people to those disorganized stickies and I had to make up my own list of links to use.

No stickies should have posting on them. They should be informational only, and well organized and look professional.

Egos and feelings DO need to be checked at the door and everyone needs to remember the reason why we are here. There should be no vying for power here or continual commands to do this or that.

This should be a welcoming place for sick people trying to help each other out.

Now let's get on with the show. We don't need members sending out their soldiers so that this post will run the risk of being deleted, too.
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
-----------Originally posted by springshowers:

TWO might say.. Do you feel that we should or can improve on our welcoming procedures to make people feel more at ease and "welcomed".


Great progress has been made on this issue. Just check out Seeking a Doctor!

I think the newbies will be very happy from now on. At least I hope so!!
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :

I only realized it when you said the skin tag on your bra line hurt!
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
uh, stupid question, but what's a stickie???
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Originally posted by randibear:
uh, stupid question, but what's a stickie??? [/qb]

The threads at the top of Medical and General.. they STAY PUT at the top .. sticky!!
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Originally posted by bigstan:
"Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our Lyme lives." [Smile]

[lol] [Big Grin] [lol]
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :

Concentrate on your bell boy uniforms! Get your mind out of the gutter [Razz]
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
i think i'm loosing it.

i feel like a pair of brown shoes at a black tie event....
Posted by TerryK (Member # 8552) on :
abx wrote:
We don't need members sending out their soldiers so that this post will run the risk of being deleted, too.

Another example of an insulting post. I'm no one's soldier. No one put me up to anything.

You and spring seemed to be unable to understand how your negative comments could be hurtful. I thought you might genuinely be interested in knowing so that you could take some of your own advice and objectively look at your own behavior.

Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
Thanks Terry but you have already covered this.

Should spring and I consider that "bashing"?

There were hurtful remarks made about me on the other post that were totally unfounded. They were made for an eye for eye jab at me.

I'm not whining about it and again I don't need to be educated.

You are changing the direction of this post. This was all on the last one.
Posted by TerryK (Member # 8552) on :
Why, because I said you might be genuinely interested in how your comments would hurt others. No, that is really what I was hoping.

Your messages would be better received without the insults.

The subject of this post was regarding what happened to the other post.

Posted by WildCondor (Member # 434) on :
Update: I have emailed Jenifer and asked her about this situation, and what to do.

I am not going to do any more work on this project until all the issues which are destructive to this forum are addressed. This is hard work folks, and there is a huge lack or respect going on here.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :

No really! Randi posted that about her bra. I totally didn't go there.

Uhh, but now that I think about it....
Posted by cantgiveupyet (Member # 8165) on :
It is sadly starting to look like another episode of 'As the Lyme Turns' happened on another forum too. Deja vous ...anyone?
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Condor is right.

This site should have the purpose of helping people with lyme get information and support. Therefore it should be as easy and user friendly as possible.

Everything needs a "make-over" at some point, and it seems that Lymenet is ready for one.

Over time, the people who are active on Lymenet have changed. Lymenet must evolve with it's users. And the users who are most active should set the spirit of this forum.

So let us concentrate on making Lymenet better and more helpful while we have people who are enthusiastic and want to make changes. Sometimes that energy is hard to find!

Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
i did no such thing. shame on you....

i'm taking my pony and going home...
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Randi, your pants are on FIRE!

i have three, what i call, skin tags. not moles just pieces of skin. they're under the bra line and get really irritated.
Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury:

I rest my case!

Did you check your pony for ticks?
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
Now Randi and James you too behave!

Randi do you like bell boys?

Boy could we use a little humor around here. [Eek!]
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Tin Cup,

I'm in my Bell Boy's Uniform waiting to give you your lashings.
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Ok .. We can do without the arguing. Back to the task of making this a better place for newbies.

Wild Condor is right!

--- sorry if this post seems out of place with all the joking!! [Razz] ----
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :

You get in line behind (or under) TC.
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Humor? You better be careful what you wish for. I can go from 0 to Howard Stern in 3 seconds!
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :

Who's joking?
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Originally posted by JamesNYC:

Who's joking?

Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :
Member A: "I don't like to see porn on a family oriented site."

Member B: "But a long time LymeNet member who is pulling down their pants all day long so the whole world can see their butt, isn't porn."

Member A: "It still isn't right to have that kind of display here."

Member B: "Most people will understand it and it shouldn't have to be changed."

Member C: "I think the one responsible should be banned because she is nothing more than a porn queen."


Who are Member A and Member B talking about?

LymeTutu... right!

Now.. Who is member C talking about?

LymeTutu... right!

I don't know of any other member that runs around here pulling her pants down, except Lyme Tutu.

If we are having a discussion about if porn should be allowed here or not...

And the only one showing her butt is TuTu... then it would be assumed that others here MIGHT know who we are referring to.


How can we discuss what could be done and what we would like to do about the porn unless we know Member A thinks TuTu's display is porn-like.


To DISCUSS issues .. and since we are all fairly intelligent.. it will ... no matter how we try to hide it, come out as SEEMING like a personal attack when it ISN'T!!!

I don't want to see porn here.. but I am NOT bashing TuTu for her part in it... just the porn.

Censoring (deleting/editing) all comments that MIGHT refer indirectly to TuTu is MY problem.

Especially if TuTu is knowing she is the one or could be the one dropping her drawers all day long... and insists on the discussion being halted because it hits close to home.

The difference is...

Member C's post is an attack on a person rather than the porn and is NOT the right way to go about this.

Can we all agree on that?


[Big Grin]
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Are you kidding me!!?

I resemble that remark!!! [lol]

( at first I had no clue what/who you were talking about! )
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
On a serious note:

I think the use of handles without real names creates an atmosphere of detachment. It's far easier to be confrontational or hurtful if people are anonymous. Obviously, the very nature of the internet is detachment, but not using names makes it worse.

We are, after all, mostly see each other as faceless text constructs. We might have a better relationship if we HUMANIZED ourselves to each other.

That I have been mistaken on the genders of so many people here is surprising. It means I'm not getting the proper sense of who people are.

So, I will start by introducing myself:

Hi everyone, my name is James. [Wink]
Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :
As I was driving down the road .. I was upset because I didn't include the following note in my quick post earlier today.

I deleted my own post and didn't mean to cause a ruckus... was hoping actually to avoid one. Truth is..

I think the moderators here have done a grand job for many years. I appreciate them SO much!

In NO way do I think they are acting on their own to edit so sternly here in this case. They are being pressured to edit sternly, are being pitted against each other.. and all just to suit one member, which I think is totally UNFAIR to the moderators... and to the members.

That is what I am objecting to.

I thank our dear LN moderators for TRYING to work this out... and keeping the peace alway... even when I may not agree with a particular decision they have made. (I usually do 100%).

We ALL need to respect their decisions... and not pit one against the other to try to benefit ourselves (manipulate them).

What they say goes! Someone has to make that final decision.

Can we agree on that?

[Big Grin]
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :
Wait, who is the porn queen? Did someone elect her that, or did she win that title? [bow]
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
aha, that was in another post and it doesn't count.

just sign me drama diva...i want to be a diva...

and lymetutu, shame on nasty girl you...
Posted by JamesNYC (Member # 15793) on :

Does too count. Does too, DOES TOO!!!!
Posted by randibear (Member # 11290) on :
i'm gonna tell the moderators on you...that'll show you.
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
I earned it, James!! [lol]

Tincup was trying to make an important point.. I think.
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
Originally posted by Tincup:
Member C's post is NOT the right way to go about this.

Can we agree on that?

Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
oh my goodness.. too funny..

Terry. I did and do take the comments seriously and do self reflect. I even go back and re read my posts and think about it. Change them sometimes.. sometimes not..

I do not see the other person talked about posting how they would be even will to take a look at this and take suggestions.

Put it out on the table. For someone in charge should and let it be discussed.. as a team and group effort..


Thats all we have been asking for..

Just what your asking for.

Again.. well all want the same things...



Thats an interesting combo..
Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :

OH yeah...

Did I forget to mention that I wasn't trying to BASH TuTu?

I was just using her as an example.

If you didn't "get" that.. see how things can be misunderstood?

See how when we forget to say something.. some might react STRANGELY?

Perfect example.. TuTu.. right now!

Posted by springshowers (Member # 19863) on :
Ok. Hey

I am willing for those who thinks I have or others have not found the right words to say what we want to say..

To.. come out and go ahead and tell us what words to use and I am willing to use them if it is what the message is intended.

You have read enough of this that I think you get the just of what some are saying.. or asking for ...

SO>> please.. Tell me how to express it correctly.

Because honestly.. I never intended to be hurtful or mean in anyway.

But I do think the point is still important to get across and talk about.

SO let me know.. THanks
Posted by WildCondor (Member # 434) on :
Enough of this garbage folks.

Stick to helping people.

Because of all this bashing and bicker, we are taking the focus off helping the people who need it.

Focus on being professional.

I am not deleting this post because that is what is wrong with this place, we need the leaders to come in and moderate and organize.

Everyone needs to calm down, and let the ones in charge control this mess. If they don't then all will be lost indeed. This post is an example of the chaos. We have/had plans to organize a smooth flowing forum with the goal of helping everyone! Now look at this! I cannot scream shame loud enough.
Posted by Tincup (Member # 5829) on :
Spring said.. "Because honestly.. I never intended to be hurtful or mean in anyway."

Good for you spring... and to add..

I don't think ANYONE of us intentionally is trying to hurt anyone.

Some, like me, have little tact sometimes (ok, a lot of the time)... and some have pretty words to smooth over things that just come naturally.

Let's all remember we are all different.. and no one here is TRYING to hurt anyone else.

[Big Grin]
Posted by Abxnomore (Member # 18936) on :
Well said!
Posted by Jenifer (Member # 697) on :
I had instructed the moderators to close a topic if it was being investigated. When posts are being added quicker than she can review, it gets very confusing. Closing it for a brief period is fine.

Updating the Links page on LymeNet, as well as the other sections, is my job. However, because of the lack of volunteers moderating on LymeNet and my busy job as the webmaster for the LDA, as well, I have not had the time to update LymeNet, which has been upsetting me for a long time!

That being said, let's concentrate on sending me that list of links and resources for the Links page, and on creating a condensed Welcome sticky!

Please cease talking about the recent bashing and move into a more productive direction. Let's help organize LymeNet!

And, yes, I will be closing this topic so we can move on. This was a bad week for the new moderators to start. Sorry moderators!! You are doing a great job though [Smile]

To answer some questions, it's not policy to notify a user if their topic was deleted or edited. We do it out of courtesy. However, when something comes up like it has these past 2 days, it is just easier to edit and move on.

The moderators do know to notify the offending member when possible, but sometime their mailbox is full, too. If they can't reach you by PM, then you can't be notified.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3