I'm almost too exhausted to post now- since i had to change my email address they gave me a new password-all that cognitive processing and direction following has me ready to take a nap!
But I will persevere-as we all do, to tell you what's been happening. The move was excruciating in many ways. But sometimes we are allowed the grace to dig down deep within ourselves for a source of strength we didn't know was there.
We had to do a rent back for the month of January. Believe me-our lives were a mess-on many levels. But the transition has been made-my husband to the trailer, and me to a basement apartment-yes I strongly felt a "time out" was necessary.
Although I recognize the hazards of being too focused on ourselves and this wretched disease, I felt the need to be at peace and not live in an atmosphere of such friction.
Multitasking is not a strength of mine at this time-and actually I stopped taking my meds in mid December simply because it was too much to keep track of. But following an appointment with my LLMD Feb. 5, I am back on course-with decisions to make about whether to proceed with bicillin shots or IV-meanwhile I continue on orals.
I am scheduled for a SPECT scan Feb. 16th. I hope that will help me decide depending on the results.I also hope it will help my family realize I really am sick and not just a malingerer. If it comes back normal well, so be it.
In the devision of property I did not get the computer, however, an old but cherished computer has been given to me by a Compassionate Friend (an organization for bereaved parents) It belonged to her six year old son,Eli, who was killed in a house fire.
So here I am-What's Up, Folks ? Love, Carol Glad to be back in the Fold.
Posted by MagicAcorn (Member # 8786) on :
Cobweb,
I've missed you. Trueblue had a birthday yesterday and I was remembering all of your poems.
May things get better for you soon.
Welcome back.
Posted by tdtid (Member # 10276) on :
Cobweb,
Welcome back!!!!!! It's hard enough to deal with lyme, but then when we add in all the complications of day to day life and things that just aren't going well, it can toss you in to a horrid downward spiral.
I'm glad you were able to get another computer since I know that for so many of us, this is our "lifeline". I've only been here several months and need this connection desperately.
It's good to hear that you on getting your treatment protocol back on track. Please continue to let us know how you are doing and WELCOME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cathy
Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
I'm feeling better already ! thanks. On my things of list to do-is take a computer course so i can be as clever as you. Gosh I don't know if I can come up with a poem in this petrified brain or not-but i will try.Good exercise for the muscle-use it or lose it and Im' agraid I'm losing it. need more exercise! Carol
Posted by Carol in PA (Member # 5338) on :
Carol Cobweb, Welcome back.
As you get settled into your new place, I hope you'll find peace and security.
Carol
p.s. Don't forget virus and firewall protection for the computer.
Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
For anyone concerned-No animals were harmed in the process of moving. Everyone found a good home. I have Bernie the cat, Ashley the dog, and Stinky the guinea pig.
Even the fish from the fish pond were netted and transported to a neighbors pond when I found out the buyer planned to fill in the pond for insurance purposes.EEK I freaked and spent two days mucking about-but it was during a warm spell-thank goodness. Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
Carol in PA- I think I need to get computer Geeks or something because I am always getting this popup message about performing an "illegal operation" and then I get booted off. So yeah-there's probably lots of old stuff on the original hard drive that idon't even know about.
So I pray everytime Iget on that it doesn't crash. Meanwhile...good to hear from you. Carol in MD, still
Posted by Michelle M (Member # 7200) on :
I've missed you!
As for the separate quarters, I can only say that no value can be placed on peace.
Welcome back!
Michelle
Posted by just don (Member # 1129) on :
NO bodies happier to see you again than I am. I was having (cob)web withdrawls,,,right next to DT's
Actually I looked up in the room corner and there you were,,,you beamed yourself right over on the web.
So sorry to hear of all thats transpired on the home front. IF its worth saving,,,by all means SAVE it!!
Time outs are nice,but long term are you better off that way or together,,only YOU can decide. And the other half has to be on same page.
IF you are all alone,,,or sorta kinda,,,does this give you more avenues as to what you qualify for?? Living quarters as well as food stamps, other medical assistance?? JUST answer your own satisfation,,,look into same!!
Whooppee she's BACK!!! It IS saturday nite too, webby??? Chat time?? Glad you got a puter,aint life grand?? You were on 'LOTS' of minds here. Do you know where lymemomtoo went by chance??
As to puter guru's,,,leaves me WAAAAAAAY out. I barely can press the 'right' keys to do this(fat finger syndrome)
ANYWAY, glad,real glad your BACCCCCK!!!!being --just don--
Posted by CaliforniaLyme (Member # 7136) on :
HEY COBWEB!*)*!)*!)*!*!)
Nice to see you*)!!!!
p.s. Magic, my 9 year old LOVES that squirrel too- (squeals, "I LOOOOVE that squirrel!!!!!!!!!"_
Posted by Andie333 (Member # 7370) on :
Carol, Hey!!
I've thought a lot about you and while it's too bad things had to come to the point they did, I'm really glad you have managed to survive.
Glad too you're surrounded by furry friends; that's wonderful!
Good to see you back here, Carol! I'm not posting quite as often before, because I've just started back to work fulltime.
A year ago, I couldn't have ever imagined that!
There can be life on the other side of Lyme, but the going through it part is pretty rough!
Glad you're back!
Andie
Posted by sometimesdilly (Member # 9982) on :
yay, its Carol!!
i'm so glad you resurfaced!
i've tried to call you- rings busy like a bad phone number, so I've assumed it changed?
please come visit! late next week after we all dig out from the snow would be great if you can make it.
ps- there is a community-oriented business around the corner from me that offers a free meeting place for groups of any kind. a few of us have spoken about getting a baltimore lyme-support/advocacy group going-sound good to you?
sending you my phone number again in a PM-
and a great big hug- dilly
Posted by bettyg (Member # 6147) on :
welcome back cobweb, you came to us in feb(ruary); now you're getting back into the ebb, and at this moment, I wished your name were Deb! to end my attempt at YOUR beutiful poetry i've missed so much, my dear cobweB!!
carol, i was ecstatic to read your pm to me in today's mailbox! so i had to track you down hoping you had POSTED ON LYMENET today; you bet!
may god give you guidance on your life and ALL you have been thru in the last 2 years and recently.
we're glad to have you back on this dear board. take care carol! come back when you can; we all love you dearly! Posted by seibertneurolyme (Member # 6416) on :
Please post the results of your SPECT scan when available. Hubby's insurance is so far resisting paying for this test.
I also feel like it would be a critical test for hubby as to whether to try IV antibiotics again.
Dr C in Missouri told us that he had only ever seen one normal SPECT scan from a Lyme patient.
I am sorry you feel you need this further proof for your family to believe that you are ill -- if I remember correctly you do have a positive test which should be proof enough.
I feel like I went 10 rounds with the hospital docs last week regarding hubby's diagnosis so I can certainly share in your frustration.
Welcome back.
Bea Seibert
Posted by lymednva (Member # 9098) on :
Great to see you back on here! I hope it's for good and that this computer works out for you!
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
quote:Originally posted by just don: NO bodies happier to see you again than I am. I was having (cob)web withdrawls,,,
He really was, Cob! He cried and cried and went on and on about your not being here. I've had to repeatedly hold his hand! Poor thing!
And then there was ME....having a HUGE withdrawal myself! So glad you're back. I need to talk to you sometime soon.
Cheers!! Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
Good Morning Everyone-I was actually in a good mood when I got up this morning-I think it's because of that feeling of being "connected". No longer Lost in Space.
I would have gotten on sooner, but first I had to WALK the dog-because one of my neighbors reported me for putting the dog out the kitchen window to do her business.TSK TSK But it's all good, sunshine, fresh air, exercise-part of a conspiracy to keep me on this path to wellness.
Now it's time to suit up for church. Back at ya later. Will say a prayer for us all, Carol
PS I took a drive by of the old house the other day and they have already begun to gut it. I could tell by the pile of debris in the driveway.Oh well-Can't move forward if you're always looking back.
Posted by stymielymie (Member # 10044) on :
WELCOME BACK WALTER AND CO. we missed you . thamks for the nice note.
how the move go?????? hope all went well. heard from my mom that its cooool up there
to bad ,should have moved down here, is the sauna of america.
love and kisses
docdave Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
Hey Doc-It was so cold around here I had to chip 1/2 inch of ice away from the INSIDE of the window frame to let the dog out !
Bea- I surely will keep you updated on SPECT results. And yes -I have positive Lyme tests up the whazoo every which way. It's just hard for all to accept the mainstay of the family is currently malfunctioning. Instead of being supported everyone's angry and in denial. I admire the fortitude with which you have met all of your ongoing trials. You set the bar for us all. Carol
Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
Dilly- tried to send a pm but your message box is full!
Andie-working full time??? that is amazing- and I am where you were a year ago-can't even imagine going back to work fulltime- but I do a little,very little, volunteer work-actually those are my best head days though. It is so good for you to share your progress-because it does give hope. thanks
PA Carol- I actually contemplated joining in the chat on Sat. Went to the site, but couldn't think of a knickname, and got easily confused on how to join in. I printed out the Help info-but it was three pages long! Will try again next Sat.
Michele-yes for now it makes sense for me to Keep It Simple-to become comfortable in my own solitude.
Tu Tu-there are some questions I have been meaning to ask you. I don't have a phone, well, I have a cell, but it gets really hot when i talk on it, which makes me a bit nervous so i don't use it much. Thanks for the welcome Home.
Time to go wander around the rest of the board, see what mischief I can get into.
Carol
Posted by bettyg (Member # 6147) on :
carol, it's just great having you back and getting back into the routine. Posted by sometimesdilly (Member # 9982) on :
CArol--
oops. cleaned out mailbox. thanks. i guess ice is coming, not snow. yuck.
still, it has to melt sometime, hopefully in time enough for that fire.
dilly
Posted by hopeful123 (Member # 3244) on :
welcome back!! nice to see you again. Posted by trueblue (Member # 7348) on :
Carol/Cobweb/and various and sundry personas ~
Welcome back! I hope things finally take a turn for the better. You sure are do!
Missed you, blue
Posted by cantgiveupyet (Member # 8165) on :
Welcome back cobweb :-)
Give my regards to carol B if you happen to see her.
I hope that the move is the start of new beginnings for you.
Im also picturing you letting the dog out the kitchen window, that made me laugh.
Welcome back , you were missed :-)
Posted by hatsnscarfs (Member # 6562) on :
Wow, I'm really happy to see this post and find out our Cobweb is back. I was thinking about you today and getting worried since it had been quite a while since we heard from you.
I recently joined freecycle. People give away computers and other good stuff all the time. You might check if it is in your area, www.freecycle.org.
hats
Posted by Cobweb (Member # 10053) on :
Thanks Everyone for stopping by -it's great to be among familiar friends again!
I went to the library yesterday to stock up on reading materials(couldn't find any books on Lyme Disease in our local library ) I also wanted to get a DVD to watch since they were predicting ice and snow.
When I got to the check out counter the librarian told me they were having a two for one special. So I went back to the rack and picked up another copy of the same title I had already selected.
Problem is- I didn't realize it until I got home! Think the librarian has lyme ,too,? cause she didn't say anything to me. Wonder if she was just being polite.
The Devil Wears Prada-hope I remember to watch it at least once before I have to return them. I can hear the freezing rain hitting the windows as I type. Looking forward to a cozy day tomorrow.
Carol
Posted by bettyg (Member # 6147) on :
carol, interesting you picked up the same dvd!? surprised too that she didn't mention something casually about the same dvd. yep, lyme is anyone's disease.
stay inside where it's warm/SAFE from falling! then come back and join us whenyou feel up to it ok!
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dilly
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) I also wanted to get a DVD to watch since they were predicting ice and snow.![[bonk]](graemlins/bonk.gif)