Please bear with me, as this is very painful to write. I am in dire need of some kind of support and understanding though.
I'll try to keep it as short as I can, but it will probably turn out to be a bit lengthy, as many of the details are important, in order for you to understand my situation the best you can.
Most of all, this will serve as my own individual story of just how much having Lyme disease can really change your life and those around you, and not necessarily for the better, especially your relationship with your family.
Most of this surrounds my relationship with my family, especially my mom, and how me having Lyme disease has affected it. I'll start with her, since she's my one and only source of support, especially when it comes to surviving daily.
Honestly, if something ever happens to her, before me, I have absolutely no idea what I will do. She helps me a little bit financially. She could help me some more, although I'm very grateful for any and all help she gives me.
It's just that having Lyme disease is so expensive, there's just never enough money to go around, so to say. If you have it, then I'm sure most of you reading this know what I mean.
My mom gets and brings needed things to me, because I'm unable to do it, such as medicine, groceries, etc., as well as takes me to doctor appointments, among quite a few other things, which I'm always thankful for and try to never forget to assure her of that.
At every doctor appointment I have, I always allow her to be in the room with me, so she can listen to what the doctor has to say. For one, if I can't remember something, then hopefully she can.
For two, most importantly, I want her to hear what the doctor has to say about how sick I really am, hoping all along she is truly listening and understanding all of it. I often wonder just how much of it she does though.
I really only have one issue with her, but it's a huge, life-altering negative one and I have no idea why. Perhaps you can help me to understand why, if you don't mind taking the time to read this and send me a reply?
As for my brothers and sister, they've simply said they just don't want to be around me anymore, at all. They don't even acknowledge me anymore.
All I do is complain about being sick, they say, which isn't true, and they say they're tired of hearing about it, because it depresses them.
I really believe, because they don't have any chronic illnesses, they really don't know what it's like, so they just can't accept me as I am.
Over time, I've learned, for the most part, to let them own their own problems there and not let it become one of mine, as I realize I have more than my share, as is.
I must admit, some days it's easier than others, so most of the time, I do okay with it, although I can't deny that I miss them and it's painful, especially around special family occasions and holidays.
On the other hand, my relationship with my mom is different. She forces me to live in government housing and use what little money I have to survive on,
when if she'd just let me live with her, then I'd have more money to spend toward treating my Lyme disease. She absolutely refuses to though, even though she has a spare bedroom.
The hurtful thing is she has allowed a lady she works with, who is unrelated to her or our entire family, to live with her for over 2 years now,
because she was in financial trouble, near being homeless, then and now she still says she's trying to improve her situation.
This lady works two jobs and has a PhD, but says she can't find a job in her profession, has no serious health problems, has a son that lives nearby she could live with,
spends money on things she doesn't really need, doesn't pay or do much, if anything, to live with my mom, could easily move into government subsidized housing, and I could go on and on.
Yet, I sit here living in government subsidized housing, only have Medicare Parts A and D insurance (will finally get part B in July), have a car that doesn't run (needs repairs I can't afford).
So, basically, I'm severely sick and the one that truly needs to be living with my mom the most, as I can't even afford the proper medical care I need.
I've tried giving my mom a copy of the movie "Under Our Skin", several papers and/or books about Lyme disease,
having a serious talk about how sick I am and what can happen to me if I continue to not get proper medical treatment, etc., but she won't even take any of them from me nor have a serious talk with me.
Also, when I try to talk to her about me having Lyme disease and even when she hears what my doctor has to say about how bad off I am and what I need to do to get better, if only I could afford it, it's like she doesn't hear a thing. Nothing about her changes anyway.
When I ask her why I can't live with her, she's given me several responses. One time she told me because we would never get along. That is so untrue.
I told her that too, but if it did happen, then I would just go to my room and keep to myself, and if it got bad, then I'd just go back to living in government subsidized housing again.
I've begged and pleaded for her to at least try, telling her how would she know if she didn't even try.
I've even went so far as to tell her I am her child, her flesh and blood, and no matter what my age is, I am very sick and can't help it that I got Lyme disease and need her help,
but since she had the means to help me and continues to deny me that, then she, not I, will have to answer to God about it, someday. I didn't say it in a mean way though.
She has also said she could never handle me dying in her house. I told her who's to say I will die there?
And how will you feel, if you don't try to let me live there, then you get a phone call saying I've died,
when I very well could afford more and better treatment, to the point I could feel so much better, where I could actually return to work and live a happier, more normal, life?
As well, she's said she's worked hard all of her life and now that she's semi-retired, she's entitled to enjoy her life, so she's not going to be my nurse and/or maid.
I tried explaining to her that neither would be expected of her, if she let me live with her. I told her I could care for and clean up after myself,
that it was the money I'd be able to save, by living with her, which would allow me to treat my Lyme disease better, which is the real reason, for me wanting to live with her.
In addition, she's said me living with her might cause my brothers and sister to not come to her house to visit her.
I told her if they had an issue with me living with her, then I would just go to my room and keep to myself, when they came over, and stay there, until they left. She's never even told me if she's even talked to them about me living with her and how they feel about it.
They never call or come see me, nor send me a card, letter, or anything, though. Not even when it's my birthday or a holiday. Anytime there is a family get-together, I never go.
This past summer, I think it was, my mom invited me to come over to her house, while they were all there, but I told her I just couldn't handle the stress of being around them, knowing how they feel about me.
I'll never forget the last Christmas I was there with them too and when all the gifts were handed out, everybody had a bunch, besides me.
My mom had got me some, but she had given them to me early. I had none from any of my brothers or sisters though.
As they were all celebrating, since my mom had picked me up and brought me there, I had no way to leave on my own, so I resorted to spending the rest of my time there in the bathroom crying, even though my mom tried to talk me into coming out. It wasn't about getting any gifts from them.
It was about the fact that they didn't even think enough of me to get me something, unlike they all did for each other, which really hurt my feelings bad and even more so, when my mom tried to make excuses for them.
Finally, my mom took me back home, once they all eventually left, but I couldn't even stand to come out of the bathroom and look at them.
It hurt me even more when mom told me she told them where I was, what I was doing, and why, yet not one of them did or said anything to me, before they left.
So, now, when Christmas comes around, mom celebrates with me alone and with all of them together. That still makes it hurt.
As is, I'm very grateful my mom goes places and gets things for me that I need and brings them to me; she takes me to my doctor appointments, which are usually out-of-town
(I have one in May that is a minimum of 2 hours round-trip and two that are a minimum of 7 hours round-trip in April and June, all of which she's taking me to);
she always comes to the emergency room, if I call the ambulance, or takes me there, if I ask her to; she has recently done my laundry for me several times now (picking it up and bringing it back to me);
she talks to various people either in person or by phone for me, when needed; she runs miscellaneous errands for me, as necessary;
she purchases things for me that I really have to have, such as food, medicine, personal and household items, etc., if I don't have any money to pay for them, at the time, and really need them,
so, in essence, she supplements my monthly income a little bit, probably about half the time without me even asking her to and she doesn't really have a lot of money by no means, but does it anyway;
when I became unable to get my dog in and out several times a day to go to the bathroom, she took her and continues to care for her; etc.
My mom will never stay at my apartment with me very long though, when she does come over, but she calls me nearly everyday, sometimes multiple times per day, and talks to me for a long time, most times, even for hours at a time, at times.
My mom and I have fought in the past, especially when I was younger, but it's been quite a long time, since I've been an adult that we've had a fight, and I can't even remember what it was about.
I've tried explaining to her that nobody gets along perfect all the time and it's just part of life that there are times that people do fight.
I told her too that just the stress of fighting really makes me feel so much sicker, so I always try to avoid it, at all costs.
I am, and am also the very first person to apologize, even if I know I'm right, just to keep the peace, so chronic fighting would never be an issue, if I lived with her, cause I just can't handle it.
I think that's pretty much enough of my story, for you to understand my awful situation with my family, especially my mom and how much I really need to live with her.
I cannot explain, as I have no words, just how painful it feels for her to continue to deny me the opportunity to live with her,
especially when she lets the lady she works with live with her and doesn't have to, as I already explained. I think she's just taking advantage of my mom.
My mom's house is big enough that all three of us could live there together, so that's not an issue.
I just can't understand how my mom can just leave me here, all alone, day in, day out, knowing I could have extra money to get the treatment I so need and deserve,
if she would just let me live in the spare room she has, which, granted, she has stuff stored in there, but doesn't really need the room, so to say.
I just want her to give me the best chance I can possibly get at getting better, which means being able to afford as much needed treatment as I can, by reducing what bills I wouldn't have to pay, if I lived with her.
My mom mentioned me going to a nursing home and I told her I'd never, ever go to one. Period. Not only would I definitely have no money, at all, to buy probably even thing I need for my treatment, such as a supplement,
I'd be severely depressed, from the type of atmosphere I'd be surrounded in, plus the fact that my immune system is so low I pick up every illness that's going around,
I'd get even more sick a lot, maybe even to the point it would cost me my life.
I'm so painfully distressed over my mom not seeing how much I desperately need to live with her and let me do it, on a daily basis.
I''m always trying to think of something I can do or say to change her mind, before it's too late. I have absolutely no idea, whatsoever, how a mother can knowingly deny her sick child the opportunity to seek proper treatment for their illness, so they can try to feel better and live a happier life.
The thought runs through my mind constantly. I cry about it all the time, because I know her letting me live with her is my one and only chance at ever truly being even halfway able to afford the proper treatment I need.
She is it. My one and only option. The only one I have left. Once she's gone I will have none. I desperately need to say or do something now and soon to change her mind, but I'm clueless. I just don't know what else that would be.
So, I just try to make the best of the isolation I live in and deal with how severely sick I've gotten, to the point where I spend most of my time in bed and hardly go anywhere.
I've begged and pleaded with organizations and strangers to please help me, before I get even sicker, which I cannot even imagine, but I never get anywhere.
The mere thought of me getting even sicker, without proper treatment, really scares me. I don't really know how I could stand feeling even sicker.
At this time, the best thing I can figure out to do is find the best possible LLMD, who will take my Medicare Part B insurance, which will go into effect in July.
Once I do that, make arrangements with Angel Flight Ministries to fly me there and back, which they will, thankfully, for free.
From that point, once I get home, follow my LLMDs plan of treatment, as much as I can, without making myself so sick I can't, at least, continue to let my mom help me like she is, right now, and take care of my basic daily needs, at home, like I have been, on my own.
The management, where I live, inspects my apartment, on a monthly basis. I have to not be so sick that I can't keep my apartment, at least, halfway clean, or else I'll get evicted.
I also have this other rule I have to follow, which I think is unnecessary, at least, in my case.
Everyday, every morning, between 6 A.M. - 11 A.M. only, I have to get dressed, walk down to the center of my hallway, and turn this colored ring hanging on a board on the wall to the opposite side, which is blank.
They say it's meant to let them know I'm okay and if I don't do it, they come into my apartment and check to make sure I am. If I refuse to do it though, I'll get evicted.
They say it's a HUD rule. I'm not so sure, but I don't know how to find out, for sure. My doctor wrote a letter to them, telling them it was unnecessary for me to do it and with my sleep issues,
it wasn't good for my health for me to have to worry about waking myself up, if my body needs to sleep, but they said the letter didn't matter. I still have to do it, else I'll be homeless.
Because of this, my sleep patterns are worse than ever, which, I'm sure, makes me feel even worse.
I'm still trying to figure out how to pay for a one night's stay in a cheap hotel and the cost of a cab, when I have an appointment with the LLMD I find
(Angel Flight Ministries won't wait on you the day of your appointment nor provide transportation, after you get to the airport; they come back and pick you up the next day though),
the supplements and such, which I really need to take, and the special tests insurance won't pay for, but I really need.
I honestly, truly need to have the special tests done. There's no doubt about that. I've already uncovered, with some special tests, some genetic and/or hereditary issues I have.
With how much sicker I get, when I treat properly, I have this strong feeling there are even more that I have, but I've just yet to uncover them.
Once I do though, I feel, for sure, that will lead to me needing some very necessary supplements, in order to proceed with proper treatment, so the affordability factor of them will become an even bigger pressure.
If you've managed to read all of this, I thank you very much. If you have any helpful advice, insights, suggestions, etc., I welcome them.
I'm at a complete loss, as to what, if any, other options I have left anymore. Right now, I feel like my life matters to no one and I've just been left to suffer and endure it the best way I can, until my life is finally over for good.
My hope is fading. If I lose it, then I don't know what else I will have left to live for.
.................................................
Breaking this up for easier reading for many here.
[ 03-20-2013, 01:46 AM: Message edited by: Robin123 ]
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
You may not like this, but your mom is right about a few things. She is entitled to live her life the way she wants to.
And yes, your siblings may abandon both of you if you live with her.
But you can still pray she will change her mind. I think you are getting good help and support from her and you should accept that with grace.
Just my take.
-
PS .. It's really difficult to live with someone else. It really could damage your relationship with her.
Posted by Keebler (Member # 12673) on :
- I've had to stop hoping anyone will ever change their mind or even want to learn more about lyme.
There are so many thoughts and I've not even read all but encourage you to NOT have your mother ever go into another medical appointment or have any communication with your doctors.
It's just best to keep that separate. You can share some details but that time with you and your doctor is not for your mother to be part of.
Find other ways to help your memory with the appointment. Having another person in the room totally changes the dynamic and can change the outcome of a good working relationship between you and your doctor.
I'm not sure how you would change that but it just strikes me as something that can keep your mother thinking of you not as an adult.
Going with you, even driving to the appointment is one thing but the exam room is for you and your doctor.
Ask her or him to outline the key instructions or take some kind of recording device, etc.
For all the other things hard as it is, she just CANNOT do what you are asking. Any judgement aside, you ask. She can't. Try to keep it that simple, for your own health. Y
ou can't wish that anyone "get" it this is just so complex. I know it hurts but we still don't have any energy to waste on what should be. We have to let go and focus on how else we might patch together some kind of a plan.
There will be other ways to fill in some gaps.
Call your area United Way and ask if there's a volunteer coordinator who may be able to help guide you.
If there is any kind of sliding fee acupuncture clinic in town, they may have some donated supplements. I once attended such a low cost clinic for HIV patients because there was nothing for those with lyme. It worked out just fine for me as the staff who understood HIV also seemed to really "get" the complexities of lyme, too.
It's so hard to feel rejected but, again, we don't have the resources to stew in this. It may take all ways of looking at this but it also may just be impossible to understand how others can not help.
They either can or can't - and to whatever degree they either can or can't.
Same with even wanting to learn more. I had to just stop even wishing others would want to learn more and let that go.
Sad that such an illness is so misunderstood but we don't have the internal resources to change anything but how we accept what we can and manage that, moving forward.
We can say "I wish this illness were better understood" and things like that but - be wary about any agenda you may have. Express a few thoughts or emotions if the time seems right but shift as much as you can to drop all expectations of others.
This will have you feeling more free in some ways, I promise.
I do still hope that, someday, the IDSA, NIH, CDC and all the regular doctors who so discount lyme will finally want to learn more. I can't let go of that hope.
But I lost hope a long time ago that anyone in my life is going to learn more just because I may need them to. Human personalities just don't do that kind of a dance very well.
I hope you can call your closest United Way and talk to them about a volunteer coordinator helping you sort through some of the tasks you have. -
Posted by Keebler (Member # 12673) on :
- I would think that some kind of legal advocate might be able to help you find another way to let your housing folks know each day that you are okay.
If you have to do that walk only at a certain time, or even at all, they are not in compliance with the ADA -- you should be able to have some kind of accommodation for your needs.
If there is a law school near you, see if they have a community clinic or could even talk by phone abou this accommodation due to disability.
A phone call to the front desk ANYTIME during the day should suffice.
A United Way volunteer might also be able to help you explore a lateral move with HUD to a different kind of unit. -
Posted by Keebler (Member # 12673) on :
- No other style of communication training (or therapy) helped me more than that outlined in this book.
You might also see if you can find a LL counselor who can help you put all this in perspective and find news ways of communicating. I think it's important that they are LL, or at least "CFS" literate.
It's important that you have a therapist who can let you voice your feelings, help you find a place for those that help and a way to move through those that do not.
This has nice little categories that hit home the P - A - C (parent, adult, child) in all of us.
Therapy can help us find our "adult" even if our body & our budget are not as strong as preferred. You may wonder how "Even if my body and budget are crumbing, how can I be strong?" There are ways.
I remember that book! It's a good one!
Posted by MADDOG (Member # 18) on :
I have the oposite problem with my mom.
She wants me to live with her and take care of her.I can't hardly take care of myself and ask no one to help me.
She seems to have just sat down and decided she was old enuf that she doesent have to do anything anymore.
One of us has to take her to get her hair washed,her groceries,get her to doctor appointments,bring in her mail ,take out her trash,buy her groceries, a nurse gives her a bath,Senior services cleanes her house,and brings her meals ,she even refuses to cook anymore.
My sister takes her everywere and is tired of it.I just feel terrible that i cant do more of the running mom arround and give my sister a break.
The guilt is tearing me apart. But i don't ask my sister to take me even to get a colonoscopy.
I drive to the ER myself and take chances on the road to get there.
I will get the senior bus to get the colonoscopy.
I rarely get any calls or anything from my sister or brother .
When mom passes away,my sister and brother wouldent know If I was dead for a year after it happened if they don't get a letter from the funeral home.
MADDOG
Posted by lpkayak (Member # 5230) on :
my family and friends bailed when i got sick. for a long time i was alone. i know how it hurts. but i have managed to make new friends everywhere i go...i have moved a few times. my friends all have problems of one sort or another-only one with lyme i think-but we somehow all help each other and get by.
it hasnt taken away the hurt of having loved ones "leave"...but it has made me more independent and as time goes by i find some family members wanting to be back in m life...altho in most cases i need to not talk about the lyme. they can handle arthritis and brain injury better than lyme.
when i got sick i was an adult with 4 kids...3 of them ended up with lyme and needed short treatment. i was also working and commuting and then my mom got sick. i really tried to help her...even having her live in my house and hiring 2 caregivers but then i started treatment and there was no way i could help her then. i still feel guilty about that.
now-i am struggling after working a long time and being sick half of that time...but if one of my kids was sick i have to be honest...i dont think i could take care of them long term.
i helped one son when he broke and arm. but i was happy when they left home and happy when they married.
im just giving you another perspective. i dont know how old you are or if that matters.
but haveing family and friends leave-including spouses...goes along with having lyme. many of us go thru this and find our own ways to cope. coming here is one of them.
i think it is a blessing your mom is doing as much as she is. asking for more might be more than she can give...and then you might not have the help she is giving. it is very important for caregivers to know their limits and take breaks.
keep coming back here. use us for support as you gain more friends. i hope it gets easier. the disease sucks and it is not fair what we have to go thru.
Posted by droid1226 (Member # 34930) on :
Maybe the reason your brothers and sisters don't talk to you anymore is because they don't directly talk to you but they all talk to your mom. She may not be telling them accurately of your situation. On top of that, it's impossible for a healthy person to fathom how terrible this disease is. Maybe you should call them and they may even be able to help.
This disease reveals how selfish some human beings really are, even blood.
Posted by Dove7 (Member # 39546) on :
First, being rejected or denied something we think is best for us hurts and cancreate anger. I'm sorry for your physical and emotional pain in this.
Different perspective here. Only child who became a caretaker for almost two decades.
My mom asked me to quit my job, leave my family (hubby and two little kids) and move in with her to take care of her. I could have, and she thought I should have.
I knew that was not a feasibe solution. She was angry and even wrote my uncle about how selfish I was being.
Took some time, but our relationship did heal. I continued visiting her daily, cleaning her house weekly, cooking, etc., plus working, and trying to fit in family time.
When she had an accident and had to go into a nursing home, I still visitied daily for over a decade. I held her hand in hospice at the end and saw her draw her last breath.
I had not given her what she wanted, but I gave her love, respect, and what she needed.
Every person has value whether I'll or healthy. Though acceptance is hard, I found thinking about how my mother wasn't perfect, but she did the best that she knew how to do.
Your mother is your mother. I can only speculate on the why's and what's. You, my dear, have the tough, tough road of accepting what is..
( I 'm kind of preaching to myself here, for accepting my limitations due to Lyme & co. is something I struggle with daily.)
Lyme drains our wallets and our emotions. Keep a calendar for your appointments. Express gratitude for your mother's help with respect and humility.
You might find a way of letting her know you look forward to the time you can spend together on trips to your appointments.
Do the best you can with meds. Tell drs. Upfront that you are on a bare bones budget. Ask for help prioritizing what you MUST have vs. what might be a recommendation.
You might also contact your local center for council on aging (sometimes listed as CICCOA) and even at your age, younger than whar they might usually deal with, they might be able to give you some rides or contacts for assistance.
This disease is frustrating. Vent here when you need to. Know you are a person of worth and value, no matter what.
Hey, think about this, you have this virtual community of brain-fogged people such as myself willing to read your words and the hurts and anger and despair within them, and respond because we care. Hugs and prayers for a better tomkrrow.
Ok, I'm back. Reading through all of this, it sounds to me like your mom is setting boundaries. You may not like them, but I think she's saying she'll do this much - and she is helping you with many things - but not more.
So my opinion is that it would be nice if you could reach out more to anyone in your community that you could think of and talk with them about your situation and see whether anyone has any other solutions, including the possibility of cheap rent somewhere else.
I'm sorry your family is so cold to you. You don't deserve that. We're sick; we're not bad people.
I agree with some of the comments above, about you finding out whether you are entitled to reasonable accommodation where you live - I think it might be through federal fair housing law? I think you should contact disability rights attys and ask.
[ 03-21-2013, 01:36 AM: Message edited by: Robin123 ]
Posted by just don (Member # 1129) on :
Hi from this old friend.
Think of it as your mom wants her privacy. Maybe she has a love life etc.?
She mostly wants unencumbered from long term family 100% day and night 24/7 care if you are worse.
She wants you to get better so easiest way is in her imagination
Friends and family just cant imagine how sick you are,,,based on how you look
Posted by beaches (Member # 38251) on :
For sure your mom is setting boundaries as Robin said. And as a mother of sick kids, I have to say that I can imagine myself doing that down the road.
Does your mother have her own health issues? That to me would be her main reason for drawing a line in the sand.
Has she been a caretaker for years to you or anyone else? That, too would be a reason for her drawing a line in the sand.
I am very sorry to hear of your circumstances. As a mother of sick kids, it would probably kill me slowly knowing that one of mine was suffering the way you are.
I can tell you that as a caretaker to sick kids while trying to maintain my own health, I am weary and I am tired.
Could this possibly be where your mother is coming from?
And if she isn't willing to have you move in with her, do you think she could help you a bit more with the medical expenses?
I wonder too if it would do you any good at all to write a heartfelt but brief note to your siblings explaining to them what you are going through and how you miss them. Just food for thought.
Best of luck to you.
[ 03-24-2013, 10:08 AM: Message edited by: beaches ]
Posted by jjeennnniiee (Member # 7964) on :
Thank you all very much for taking the time to share your thoughts with me. I sincerely appreciate it from the very bottom of my heart.
I keep re-reading your posts and thinking about all that you all have said. I don't have any answers. I wish I did.
Given some more time to think things through a lot, I hope to be able to post some more here about this. I just need some more time to digest all of it.
The only thing I do know is I truly need my mother now and I haven't reached a point where I can accept her rejection. Right now, I really don't know if I can. For now, all I feel is the pain and it runs deep.
I'm sorry for not breaking up my post more, as painful as it is for me to even come out of my shell and write all of this in a public forum.
I hope I've done a better job this time. If not, I'll go back and redo it. Just let me know.
Posted by poppy (Member # 5355) on :
I don't know if a person with an illness ever gets over the rejection of family and friends. The hurt is always there. Just have to live with it and try to think about it less. Easier said than done. Caregiving is very time consuming and can be depressing. People may not have the strength to do it forever, and some may have used up their coping ability with their own problems. And they can be wrapped up in their own lives, just going thru a routine. Hard to step out of that track. Not speaking strictly here about your situation, but of other people's too.
And sometimes the answer can be found in the past. Maybe the clues about relationships were there all along, based either on personalities or events.
Possibly it might be useful if you thanked her frequently for what she does, write her thank you notes now and then. Buy or pick some flowers for her on mother's day, birthday. Might not change her behavior but would remind both of you that she does help to some extent, and you would be very hard up if that help stopped.
Can you find phone friends from the support group from your area, to feel some more caring?
Posted by MADDOG (Member # 18) on :
Robin123 This statement hit me totally THANKS!
We're sick; we're not bad people.
MADDOG
Posted by Dove7 (Member # 39546) on :
Remember that we have two types of families, those we are born/adopted into and the ones we build over our lifetime by choice.
Could you try something? Call your mother to come over for a cup of coffee/tea, a simple soup lunch, or to play a board game.
Show her that you want her as well as need her. (If that's not true right now, fake it 'til you make it.)
People want to be wanted. I hope it's a better week for you. Here it is, for our daughter just came in to say that with tomorrow's snow day, she wants a pajama day where we spend the day in pj's as long as we want.
Posted by Robin123 (Member # 9197) on :
[QUOTE]Originally posted by MADDOG: [QB] Robin123 This statement hit me totally THANKS!
We're sick; we're not bad people.
MADDOG
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Thanks - I'm sure glad your name is Maddog and not Baddog...
I always think - who owns the problem? Was it any of us who did this? I don't think so. We're victimized by this situation, so don't take on responsibility for it.
It's definitely a gamechanger, in that we generally think we're in charge of our life, so when that's taken away by illnesses like these, we still tend to think in the old way - ie, we're responsible - when we're not.
Being that we have nothing to do with all this, and that we are choosing to fight back, I think that makes all of us heroes and heras! (female form)