Topic: Quality of memory loss changing for the worse
BoxerMom
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 25251
posted
In spite of unrelenting insomnia and brain fog, my memory and cognitive functions have remained mostly intact during this 20+ year Lyme odyssey. Some slower processing during herxing, but crazy solid memory.
OK, sometimes I needed a memory nudge, where someone says, "You remember blah blah blah..."
And I'm like, "Oh yeah," and the entire detailed memory comes back.
But now, it's like events never happened. Like they weren't recorded when happening. I don't remember details of many events, which is OK. But often, I don't remember events at all, even when provided with details!
And forget names! I'm lucky to remember my own. I had to introduce a co-worker the other day, and I forgot her name! My co-worker!
GretaM
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 40917
posted
I think forgetting coworkers names is normal. (I hope!)
I have been at the same job for 9 years.
About twice a month I forget how to get to work. I get lost driving there. Nothing looks familiar and I don't recognize the building.
I have lost most of my long term memory.
About half my short term memory.
Names faces events places conflicts etc.
Can't remember much, which has actually been for the best as each experience now feels new.
Also, I can't often remember if I like a person or not, so all my interactions are neutral.
The downside is I have to relearn technical things at my job almost daily, so it puts me behind my peers productivity-wise.
Another downside, somedays it's hard to word find, so I sound like an idiot when I talk.
I can't play jeopardy do crosswords or write anymore. Don't remember words very well.
I can't read maps, give directions or find my way out of shopping centers. I forget how and don't have the mental energy to relearn.
It used to be scary but now I am used to it.
Posts: 4358 | From British Columbia, Canada | Registered: Jun 2013
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GretaM
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posted
But forgetting coworkers names and needing some prodding to bring back memories is normal Posts: 4358 | From British Columbia, Canada | Registered: Jun 2013
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surprise
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 34987
posted
Mine is also very disturbing at times, and I'm 46. I am impressed yours is so intact.
There are times I am pretty good, but, others, not so much. I have a LOT of past living I can't retrieve details.
I think it's because I went decades (and maybe longer) untreated.
I've learned to adapt- writing lists, etc. I am incredibly organized- I put things away in the same place- never lose things-
But the movie we saw 2 nights ago? Um... give me a minute... Living in the 'present moment' is the key to happiness, right?
I take the 'brain stuff' Curcumin, coconut oil, eat very healthy, gluten free, and continue to try and improve my health.
Other than that, yes, I do get embarrassed about it sometimes.
-------------------- Lyme positive PCR blood, and positive Bartonella henselae Igenex, 2011. low positive Fry biofilm test, 2012. Update 7/16- After extensive treatments, doing okay! Posts: 2518 | From USA | Registered: Nov 2011
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surprise
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 34987
posted
'Also, I can't often remember if I like a person or not, so all my interactions are neutral. '
LOL!
I've learned to note where I park the car-
The worst experience was after I had my last child (before treatment) and
I would be at a stop sign in my car, waiting for the light to change green. (At a stop sign: no traffic light there!)
-------------------- Lyme positive PCR blood, and positive Bartonella henselae Igenex, 2011. low positive Fry biofilm test, 2012. Update 7/16- After extensive treatments, doing okay! Posts: 2518 | From USA | Registered: Nov 2011
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BoxerMom
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 25251
posted
"Also, I can't often remember if I like a person or not, so all my interactions are neutral."
This one jumped out at me too! I want it! Because I pretty much hate everyone now.
And movies? If I can follow the plot, I'm thrilled. Cuz I won't remember a thing about it by the next day. Or next hour.
Television series are problematic, again cuz I don't remember plots from week to week. Or new characters.
I also think I have poor facial recognition. Everyone looks the same, or I just don't remember seeing them before.
Yeah, I can't believe I hung in for so long. This latest shift has been dramatic.
Definitely time to implement lists. For everything.
Brush teeth. Wash face. Put on jammies. Go to bed. (That's the hard one.)
Kudzuslipper
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 31915
posted
Boxemom, you're just very very zen!!! You live in the moment! Enjoy it.
I don't know if its Lyme or aging (or repression of my childhood...lol) but your post sounds like me!
Posts: 1728 | From USA | Registered: May 2011
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Catgirl
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 31149
posted
quote:Originally posted by BoxerMom: ...I pretty much hate everyone now.
Ha ha! Love it!
The accumulation of toxins eventually affects our brains (heavy metals, chemicals, pesticides, etc). We all need a cleaner environment, so making wise choices over the food, and products we use is not only going to behoove us, but everyone else too. Even those squiggly light bulbs have mercury in them (I've stopped buying them). Demanding clean water and air is so important as well (affects us all).
-------------------- --Keep an open mind about everything. Also, remember to visit ACTIVISM (we can change things together). Posts: 5418 | From earth | Registered: Mar 2011
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WPinVA
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 33581
posted
The loss of my short term memory is one of the most frustrating things for me. I have terrible face recognition. It wasn't ever great, but now with Lyme it's just embarrassing.
I can't remember if I've met someone before so my social interactions are pretty neutral too. I learned this the hard way after asking someone how her new baby was doing. She was NOT the one with the new baby. Ugh.
Posts: 1737 | From Virginia | Registered: Aug 2011
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surprise
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 34987
posted
Hey BoxerMom, had a thought, since you said this was new to you- do you think the cannibas oil you started could have
anything to do with it? I know it doesn't get you high, still, maybe?
I had to socialize with new Moms on Saturday that I'll be seeing more often. One said to me: I'm really bad with names.
I said: if you ask me mine again in 6 months, it will make ME feel a lot better.
Another thing I do in verbal conversation is try and figure out how long ago something happened: '5 years ago? Wait, 4 years ago? No, 3 years ago!'
If I could stop this habit, I'd sound a lot smarter.
-------------------- Lyme positive PCR blood, and positive Bartonella henselae Igenex, 2011. low positive Fry biofilm test, 2012. Update 7/16- After extensive treatments, doing okay! Posts: 2518 | From USA | Registered: Nov 2011
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BoxerMom
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 25251
posted
quote:Originally posted by WPinVA:
I can't remember if I've met someone before so my social interactions are pretty neutral too. I learned this the hard way after asking someone how her new baby was doing. She was NOT the one with the new baby. Ugh.
lpkayak
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 5230
posted
Im pretty sure the 'blacking out" of memorys is not permanent. For years that has happened to me...and the days or weeks later i will remember what i couldnt
I believe the problem is in the processing...it is going back to get info that is problem-not that info isnt there
Many things affect the processing for me including herx,sleep,stress...
I have read about this in papers by scheer and bransfield-it has been studied
Recently i noticed a big decrease in cognitve and recall very specific and clear...but i am going back to the level i was the more time that goes by from anesthesia and also as i cut down on narcotics...it was scarey to regress so fast but it all seems to be coming back
-------------------- Lyme? Its complicated. Educate yourself. Posts: 13712 | From new england | Registered: Feb 2004
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BoxerMom
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Member # 25251
posted
lp - soooooo glad to hear you on the upswing!
Brussels
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 13480
posted
Boxermom, don't worry much.
I do think we do NOT even record what happens. Our memory shuts down.
I felt desperate in the beginning. After, I got used to it, it was just embarrassing, as I kept meeting people and didn't know I had met them before.... I felt like sooo stupid many times, as the events hadn't been recorded anywhere!!!
Well, the good thing is: memory can come back. Not the lost memory, but the ability to have memory again.
The most amazing thing when I recovered from lyme was one day, when I realized I had TWO WHOLE YEARS from my past that had almost nothing inside. A blank, literally.
It took me time to accept that blank. It was huge. How could just two years of my life be blanked out like that?
I think it was more shocking for me, when I got my brain back, my memory, my health, my taste, my feelings to people, to the world back, because I realized, what I lived during the worst periods with lyme, was not at all a life!
That HOLE in my past, I felt, was almost PHYSICAL, I could almost touch it, so real it was. Just blank.
Looking backwards though, I think it somehow protected me of the horrors of awareness. I mean, it would be worst to have all my brain capacity and realize that I was just slowly dying, loosing everything.
SOmehow, that loss of memory, loss of awareness, loss of knowing, protected me from desperation.
anyway, just keep treating. I swear my ability to store memory is back, as it was before lyme. It's just that those years I had NOT got memory ability, they are imprinted WHITE. Nothing inside.
and I know EXACTLY what you said about watching a movie, and not understanding it anymore. Or reading ONE PAGE of a simple text, and simply not getting what it is about.
Again, no worry, it comes back. Just don't lose much timy trying, it just makes you feel worse. Keep treating, everything will come back as it was before!!
Posts: 6199 | From Brussels | Registered: Oct 2007
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Rivendell
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Member # 19922
posted
Ditto on everything said here.
And I am glad it came back for you Brussels, and I hope it does for all of us.
GretaM
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 40917
posted
This is the best thread ever! I saw myself in every post on here! And I laughed and laughed.
It's funnier to black out memory-wise when others are doing it too.
I saw a distant relative. Didn't recognize him, and when someone introduced us, I said I vaguely recognized him.
He smartly replied that we carpooled one time...for 10 hours from a funeral.
Hmmm... Tried to crawl into a hole after that one...
Posts: 4358 | From British Columbia, Canada | Registered: Jun 2013
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Rumigirl
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 15091
posted
quote:Originally posted by GretaM: But forgetting coworkers names and needing some prodding to bring back memories is normal
I disagree that it's normal! That is not to say that it doesn't happen to people who don't have Lyme; it does. But not that much (if at all). And it happens MUCH more to people with Lyme & co. Sadly.
Posts: 3771 | From around | Registered: Mar 2008
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In the past I had some memory issues that really came up for me at work where I meeted so many people and had to connect with them to get my work done well.
At that time I found that supplementing with non gmo soy lecithin really helped me.
The brain is made of fats and oils. Coconut oil really works for some also. B vitamins, and lots of oxygen in what ever way you can get it. EWOT therapy can help. google EWOT
Posts: 803 | From USA | Registered: Oct 2013
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posted
So how is you all memory as of today? Any improvement? I myself forget which date we have. I thought something about 1980... my birth year, then i counted up from 2000 until i got to 2019 and knew ut somehow. That was scary :/
Posts: 68 | From Germany | Registered: Nov 2019
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posted
I seem to be at a plateau or it is all permanent. I do seem to miss pieces of time and I am sure I forget other stuff.
My big issue is expressing myself. I can watch something on tv and immediately try to explain it to someone who just walked into the room and I can't. Or just in everyday conversation.
I also get things opposite. Can only follow at the most 2 instructions in a row. Other stuff.
I have been this way a long time and have accepted it. it feels permanent to me. I am sick of trying so many supplements etc to get my brain better. None of it works.
Almost everyone tells me that this, especially the memory issues, happens to them so it is a product of aging.
They have no idea.
(breaking up the post for easier reading for many here)
Im in the same boat. It is this since years. I allways thought its just me because my brother, father can tell a movie very good what happened.
Me, im 38 and just cant. I just mix everything up or forget the half of it. Well, i started mHBOT yesterday. We will see if it improves. You can follow my updates there as i go along
Posts: 68 | From Germany | Registered: Nov 2019
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