I am not depressed...I enjoy doing all the things I've always enjoyed. I go to dinner with friends, movies with my husband and love my children more than imaginable. But, every day when I have to swallow a fistful of pills three times a day, the meds make me Herx or feel like I'm going to throw up, I wish I did not have a family so it would not hurt anyone if my life were to end.
I cannot get rid of the Babesia. It will not go away. It has been a year and a half of Mepron and 1500mg of high quality Artimisenen and it won't go away.
The Mepron counteracts one of my Bart/Lyme antibiotics.
Now, other systems are starting to fail (endocrine).
And, our time for more children is fading. My twins are special needs and we did not want to leave them alone after their parents are gone. We are happy with just them, but wanted this FOR them.
Can anyone advise on how to kill the beast (Babs)?
Posted by map1131 (Member # 2022) on :
Well one things for sure. I'd kill the beast, I'll be damned if the beast will kill me.
That is the attitude you are going to need to win. Win doesn't necessarily mean "cured". Maybe it's time to look at other treatment options.
Winning might be only needing half of a handful of pills 3 times a day. The odds are most of those pills are not helping you, reacting to the other pill, etc.
My advice on killing the beast: read my signature line.
Pam
Posted by LightAtTheEnd (Member # 24065) on :
I am so sorry you're having such a difficult time. I don't have Babs (that I know of), so no practical advice.
I agree with Pam--don't give up, no matter what. Giving up is the only way that definitely WON'T help. Giving up won't cure you, and it won't help you deal with being sick, and it won't help your kids who need you.
You probably know way more about Mepron than me by now, but be aware that other people have said on here that it has given them suicidal thoughts, that went away when they stopped taking it, switched meds, or took a break from it for a few days.
Posted by massman (Member # 18116) on :
I am using a mixed herbal called Micro-site from Inno-Vita that seems to be working well.
Should not interfere with anything else.
Also some support for liver, kidney, spleen, hypothalamus, pituitary + thyroid.
Posted by glm1111 (Member # 16556) on :
I have been doing the salt/c protocol (sea salt) for over 3yrs and it has saved my life.
Sea salt and vitamin c supports the adrenals as well as supplying vital minerals,
Gael
Posted by nefferdun (Member # 20157) on :
Have not solutions but just want to tell you to hang in there. You are not alone.
Posted by joalo (Member # 12752) on :
Have you tried enula? It seems to be helping to keep my babesia knocked back while I treat lyme.
Posted by METALLlC BLUE (Member # 6628) on :
Switch to Malarone.
Posted by venus (Member # 16991) on :
I don't have any answers for you, but I know the feeling well. It just all seems too hard. Try to keep the faith that it will get better. Lean on lymenet for support. I wouldn't have made it this far without people here telling me to have faith.
Posted by Dekrator48 (Member # 18239) on :
I'm praying for you...that you find the strength you need to continue the fight, and that God will guide you in the right direction.
Posted by whome (Member # 18979) on :
That you all for the kind words.
joala - what is enula?
metallic blue - malarone is a pill, right? isn't it the same generic medicine as mepron?
the only alternative i know if lariam (melfoquine) which has horrible known side effects
Posted by sickpuppy (Member # 23846) on :
Last night I was having similar thoughts, terrible violent thoughts about my own destruction. Then I went to bed and when I woke up those thoughts were gone. They'll come again and I'm pretty sure they'll go away again.
Here's a good quote: As long as you keep trying, there's hope.
Posted by beths (Member # 18864) on :
I sometimes wished I could fade away, when first battling this disease. I felt so bad for my family..but my kids need a mom, my husband needed a wife..so I went thru months of pure hell. I have babs, bart, and Lyme. Took about 18 months to see some shred of light. Fast forward..I'm back at work, taking care of my family and doing well. I pulse meds..I hate to take them, but the alternative isn't pretty.
Mepron didn't work for me..I alternated between bactrim/zith and malarone zith for babs.
Posted by the flim-flam man (Member # 23310) on :
"When things look bad and you think you're not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plum mad-dog mean." - Josey Wales
I too had those thoughts. All day, everyday for awhile. Still come and go from time to time. Draw strength from ANYWHERE you can find it. If I can do anything, let me know. Take Care. Don.
Posted by Cockapoo1996 (Member # 14238) on :
quote:Originally posted by METALLlC BLUE: Switch to Malarone.
I agree with Metallic Blue. Mepron didn't work for me at all but Malarone is helping a lot! I am also taking Bactrim.
This all happened because I switched Lyme docs.
Posted by METALLlC BLUE (Member # 6628) on :
Dang, I didn't answer this question: Malarone is "not a generic of Mepron." It is a different drug. It is a pill. It contains "mepron, as atovaquone, which is poorly absorbed in pill form, but it also contains proguanil hydrochloride which is extremely powerful when combined with the Atovaquone, Normal dose is 250/100
One MALARONE Tablet (adult strength = 250 mg atovaquone/100 mg proguanil hydrochloride) per day.
Dosage for Prevention of Malaria in Pediatric Patients
2 MALARONE Pediatric Tablets as a single dose daily 31-40 187.5 mg/75 mg
3 MALARONE Pediatric Tablets as a single dose daily >40 250 mg/100 mg
Posted by jmb (Member # 18338) on :
If even a little part of you wants to die I think you are depressed. I know I am.
Posted by apljack (Member # 14233) on :
Where's the Zith? Maybe you need to switch brands of artemisin. Try artemisia?
This disease sucks, there is no way around that. You've got a full hand with two special needs children. You will come through this, I know you will. Keep coming to these boards. I can't tell you how many times I felt that death would be easier. But, I don't feel that way anymore. It gets better, really it does.
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
FYI to others ... THIS IS AN OLD THREAD. "WHOME" hasn't been here in a long time.
Posted by nefferdun (Member # 20157) on :
Babesia takes the joy out of life. I am improving on Mepron/zithro but at such great expense!
I agree you need to switch to another protocol - the malarone is a good idea.
Reading your post reminded me that I wanted to add my left over Bactrim DS to my protocol so I got up to take it. I accidentally knocked the container on the floor sending it flying everywhere. Was that ever aggravating!
With some of the pills all broken up that reminded me to start at a lower dose to make sure I don't have a reaction. I thought they sure are dirty but heck, they are antibiotics - bugs have no chance. Sometimes our misery is hilarious.
Just keep on keeping on and you will make it.
Posted by METALLlC BLUE (Member # 6628) on :
quote:Originally posted by Lymetoo: FYI to others ... THIS IS AN OLD THREAD. "WHOME" hasn't been here in a long time.
Guess I was a "little" late in responding to the question. HAHAHAHA
Posted by Lymetoo (Member # 743) on :
That's OK!! If someone searched, they would want the info.
I was just alerting those who were "talking" to WHOME. Posted by Karen Mc (Member # 23354) on :
Yep, thats what happened...Even though it was an old thread, I searched it and found it...the info is helpful...Thanks Posted by Green Darkness (Member # 985) on :
Finally someone sounds like what I have experienced. Thank you for this post. Now I can get mean and try harder.
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