My tears are falling heavy tonight like the rain outside. Everyone is in bed and I'm lying awake wondering when or if this will ever end. My stomach has been in such bad shape for so many months now that I've not been able to take antibiotics or vitamins. All my doctors say there is nothing wrong with my stomach (no answer for the nausea and pain behind my belly button), no explanation for the pain behind my knee that goes down into my ankle making it painful to walk, no explanation for any of this!!!!!!
No explanation for why the last several years my life has been on hold because of this disease and all the stuff that goes along with it.
No explanation why my children have been robbed of an active mother.
No explanation why my husband has been robbed of the wife that once was whole.
No explanation why our bank account has been depleted.
No explanation.....I know we aren't supposed to question why but it gets harder not to as each day passes and I continue to be ill.
No explanation for my post except for feeling so very lonely and confused.........
Posted by glm1111 (Member # 16556) on :
Michele,
I am so sorry that you are so sad and suffering. My stomach used to be in bad shape with a lot of pain.
Most doctors are unfamiliar with the fact that one of the co-infections of Lyme disease is parasites/worms. The only thing that helped me was antiparasitic herbs and salt/c Check out
This is what came out of me 6 mos after I started these protocols. Do a search on here under parasites and the check out the symptom list at Humaworm.
PLEASE don't ignore this and realize that sometimes we have to take control of our own treatment in order to get better. It was the most empowering thing I ever did. Hope this helps.
Gael
Posted by Robin123 (Member # 9197) on :
Michelle, I hear you - so many of us go through these feelings - the pain, the unfairness, the losses -
If it's any consolation to you, I think you have the beginnings of a poem, with your heading, if you feel like shaping one -
It's not good to listen to doctors who don't know how to treat. Have you been able to treat at all, with a doctor who understands? My understanding is each of us needs to find the treatment combination that's going to help our symptoms.
Posted by momindeep (Member # 7618) on :
My daughter's gut went horribly wrong, too...she lost too much weight because she could not eat without incredibe pain, she could not even drink things...even water...and had to quit antibiodics also.
Treatment had to stop, so her LLMD and LLND could get her gut back on track.
Yeast and parasites can cause you much, much, illness...even more, at times than LD and I am convinced when your gut is compromised in such a way...no treatment will help you much...even if you can tolerate it IMO...and this is what I have observed.
Just like mentioned above, parasites and perhaps yeast, need to be looked at. So many people say this and I agree...this is an important part of the puzzle that has been revealed to many.
I am so very sorry for your hopelessness. It is an unforgiving illness that doesn't offer concrete answers and seems to mock us.
There is an answer...perhaps today you cannot imagine that as truth, but there is an answer indeed.
Sue
Posted by momlyme (Member # 27775) on :
This is what my son and I have done.
At the minimum cut out dairy, wheat, yeast and sugar.
Then add probiotics, lots of kefer, detox teas, juicing, a cleanse diet, parasite cleanse when tolerated.
Eat lots of raw veggies an natural foods. Nothing processed.
There is a very gentle parasite cleanse to start with called detoxosode by HVS labs. I get mine from my nutritionist.
Aloe Vera is another stomach soother we have found.
My son has had terrible tummy troubles since last June.
I have a pain in my right side that has been constant since 2007. 3 times in 4 years, I have started throwing up uncontrollably. I went to the ER when that happened.
Posted by lyme in Putnam (Member # 11561) on :
One day at a time,one minute at a time sometimes. That's what I can offer you. My son had it for 3 years, now 16 and he's fine, I was dormant 3 times, it's possible. This time I lost myself. It's tough to go through. I just try to keep doing in he hopes I'll be back to what and who I love.
Posted by map1131 (Member # 2022) on :
Michele, it just might be these darn spring rains that are making you sad. I live closer to the Ohio river these days due to record April of 14 inches of rain.
I know most of IN has been in same boat(no pun intended).
I know everything looks bad today, but maybe tomorrow will be better. You can't be physically active with kids but just giving them some verbal and loving talk will assure them Mom will be okay.
As far as the husband---Have you seen the Spoon Story written by lady that had chronic illness?
I printed that off and let my husband read it. He would ask me at night if I had used all my spoons today? If you children are old enough to understand this story, maybe you could lay out spoons and they will know how you are doing by # of spoons.
You can't stress over money. It is what it is. If you don't listen to Dave Ramsey, I would recommend you go to his web site.
He will tell you....you make a list of who gets paid. Food, shelter and utilities. Everyone else is just going to have to wait. If you have car payments eating you guys up. Sell them and buy a cheap car that will get you where you need to go.
Please give him a listen. Don't make yourself and your illness worse by feeling guilty.
Pam
Posted by sonee123 (Member # 18632) on :
I am so sorry! I felt like i was going to die for past 3 weeks i have been on the bed.
Today i can say i am able to get up and walk around. I was good for past two days and today i feel sick again.
Hang in there. It will pass and you will feel somewhat better in a week. It's a harsh cycle!
Posted by arkiehinny (Member # 26546) on :
Oh my.....you are truly in crisis here! I don't have the words to convey my concern but one thing comes to mind:
"Do not fear, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10.
Posted by Michele (Member # 13669) on :
Thank you all for the support. Finally got into my local physician and from the sound of things he said I've got some inflammation and critters in my colon. He gave me 3 days treatment of cipro 3x day and flagyl 2x day and to continue probiotics. I'm scared to death to take all that for fear of a major herd but I want to feel better gut wise so I can get back on track with my llmd and a course of treatment. I hope this goes well...I've have not taken flagyl for treatment yet.
Thank you all for being here!
Posted by lpkayak (Member # 5230) on :
whoa-none of us picked up on c-diff. that is a tuff one - no wonder you felt bad. you are on the right tx and will feel way better soon.
a lot of what was said above may continue to help you...but since you are susceptible you probably should take sbc regualrly---usually if you are on it you don't get the infect you got
also it is usually worth the money to get a really good probiotic...in the end it is not o expensive cz you take less many of us like theralac
good luck-i know you will feel better soon
Posted by Dogsandcats (Member # 28544) on :
It is a different kind of loneliness with Lyme. You described it so well. I thought I knew what lonely was until I had Lyme. I hope in the last few days you have felt better. Big hugs!