I am firmly convinced that the majority of drs are just plain stupid and unethical and downright liars.

There that said, I have never laughed so hard in all my life as at the screwup posts. I think we all need more laughter, it's one of the few ways I can forget what I am dealing with.

Those srewup posts got me through several days. Lets have some more. It makes me feel so much better to know everyone else messes up just as much as I do.

I forgot to put the drink in my husbands lunch today and I forget to add his apple all the time. However I never without fail forget to add the knife with which to peel the nonexistant apple with.

What's the funniest, stupidest things you have done and please don't be shy. I'm sure nomatter what it is someone else can top it.

On two separate occasions now, I've tried to turn the hairclippers off by shutting the bathroom faucet.

I also frequently open the oven door and look inside for no reason at all.

I'm prone to sudden dizzyness and vertigo, and do these picturesque moves to recover - am told it can be hilarious watching me try to stand up from a sitting position.

Had a real bad day a month ago when I had to go to doctor. My friend has to drive me, I'm not safe behind the wheel (duh!).

Or...calling someone one the phone and having to ask "Who is this?", because I forgot who I was calling.

Or...driving to the grocery store a mile away from home, and showing up in my Mom's drive way, 15 miles away, went in and she asked what was I doing there in the middle of the day and the kids were home...

had to say, (to save face) "Just stopped by for a 'quick' visit" and left immediately to get home cuz the kids were waiting on the step to get in.

Never did stop at the store. I'm sure I left her as well.

Those a just a FEW of my stories.
-laserred-

I had no idea how to do it. I was turning everything and nothing worked. I finally pulled into a store lot and turned the car off to stop them. Went into the store for a hour and came back out and remembered how to do it.

I was so freaked, I thought I was going to have to call my husband to ask him how to do it.

I once took a beach chair from the back of the car,closed the back door, leaned the chair up against the rear bumper, intending to put it away. I then ran over it backing out of the driveway! Instead of taking the chair inside as intended, I instead got into the car to go to a local store.

Obviously, you're supposed to leave the keys in the ignition when you get out so they can park it.

I not only left the keys in the ignition, but left the car running and then LOCKED THE DOORS. So, the car was running, blocking cars going in and out.

How embarassing. Had to get a locksmith. Kerching $$$$

Once I pulled up to a red light in the lane next to a police officer. I waved at him. He waved back. We smiled. I then ran the red light. He pulled me over and asked, "Lady what kind of drugs are you on??" Had to do the sobriety test in middle of town in middle of day.

Left my new neighbor's child at the pool. It was her first visit. Remembered my children forgot her.

Last week I left my sunroof open and 3 inches of rain poured in...

My last visit to my LLMD who is located out of town. I left pocketbook at home and realized it when I arrived in Huntersville 3 hours later. Thank God, I had my mother since I am not a good driver these days..she helped pay.

One day it took several circles around gas pumps to figure out which side to pump gas on....my riders were in hysterics.

I couldn't find the milk in the frig. Asked my son, who'd just used it. He didn't know. We looked all around. No milk. Then I looked at what he was doing, making chocolate milk. Milk, spoon, glass...

Yup, the milk was in the glasses cupboard.

Like Shaz, one day woke up to find SOMEONE had put the milk in the pantry.

Went up to the barn to feed the horses...couldnt remember why I was there. Went back down to the house to "retrace" my steps. Got to the house, knew I had to remember something, but couldnt remember what. However this screw up, lead to me going back on lyme treatment!

Pay for the meals and drive away without picking it up.

Spend $103 and 45 minutes at the grocery story. Pay for groceries and drive 8 miles home . . . only to realize I'd forgotten to pick up the groceries.

My son and I both left our house in separate cars one evening, with a plan to meet in front of his girlfriend's house.

I arrived some 3 minutes later and parked across the street. I waited for him with the radio on for 5 minutes, 10, then 15 minutes. I silently wondered where on earth he had disappeared to. Decided to recline in my seat and relax. Another 5 minutes or so passed when my son suddenly popped his head through the driver's side window.

He said, "Mom, what the hell are you doing?" I said, I've been waiting for you, where have you been?"

"Mom, take a look around."

I did. Nothing out of the ordinary.

My son said, "Do you even know where you are?"

"Well, yes, I'm in front of Megan's house."

He pointed out to me that I was parked one street over from her house. I was waiting on the wrong street. It was also a street we used to live on years ago.

Geesh. Hope everyone laughs . . . or cries over this one!

Please keep them coming I'm going to save them all and read them over and over every time I screw up which will be a lot.

By the way my lyme support group all wanted to listen to that radio show on lyme today.

The group leader even asked me to remind her to listen. After I picked myself up off the floor and stopped laughing, I reminded her that someone would have to remind me first, so I asked my husband.

In the regular kind, I can be standing there, remembering that I forgot to do something, and if I retrace my steps in my mind, I can recall what I wanted to do. In Lyme fog, I am momentarily flummoxed by everyday habits or words. I have had others correct my words for me, and I have no idea that I misspoke.

My son chuckled over these stories, and asked me to include this one on him, which happened early in his treatment, and gave me to know that we were on the right track:

Getting ready for school, I told my son to go brush his teeth. He headed down the hall, stopping at the corner, STARING at the corner. For a long time. For a longer time. Finally I said, "Son! Brush teeth!" and he said, "Oh, okay," like that was a novel idea, and continued down the hall.

We may never know what was so interesting about that corner....

Shaz

My friend and I left a restaurant after eating dinner together, we were heading back to her house for the night.

She led in her green minivan and I followed, even though I knew the way. There was some fog and I lost sight of her for a few minutes.

When I got behind her again she turned from the normal main route. I followed her thinking it must be a short cut that I didn't know about.

The road turned into a secondary road and then to a dirt road. I was wondering "Where on earth is she going?"

Then she turned into this 'Windy Hill Farm'. I followed her up this dirt farm road past horse pastures and barns to the top of a hill. The whole time thinking "What is she doing with her lyme brain self?"

It appeared to be a wedding. I thought we were stopping by to visit someone. I pulled behind her and was ready to ask what we were doing there. As her drivers door opened some man I've never seen in my life got out of the minivan which it turns out was marroon, not green.

I was so embarrased. I turned the car around and left. My friend was like "What happened to you?" When I finally arrived at her house 20 minutes later...

I went away for the weekend and at night went to brush my teeth. I took my sonicare toothbrush out of my bag and squeezed toothpaste on it. It looked funny and as I moved it toward my mouth I saw that the protective plastic travel cover was still on the brush.

I rinsed the toothpaste off the plastic cover and then squeezed toothpaste onto the cover again. I looked at it knowing something was wrong but still didn't know what to do. I stared at it a while and then rinsed it again. Just as I was about to squeeze toothpaste onto it a third time it occured to me to remove the cover first!

Here's one from this week: Since lyme turned me into "hatsnscarfs" I always wear a hat for sun protection. I have lots of stylish hats. I have trouble with sunlight and often wear big dark glasses too.

I left my house in the afternoon for a 3 hour drive heading west. Knowing the sun would be in my eyes I rummaged through the back of the car looking for a cap to sheild my eyes. I couldn't find a cap but did find my white summer sun hat buried under some things. It was filthy and crushed. The big brim was bent in a funny shape and stuck straight up in back. I grabbed in anyway since it worked really well for blocking glare.

Once I was on the road I took off my stylish wool hat and put on the crushed sun hat. The sun was really bright so I bent the brim down over my eyes both in front and on the side. I periodically mushed it different ways to block all the glare.

An hour later I stopped to get gas. While I was pumping gas I noticed the people in the car behind me were staring at me.

I thought it might have been my stylish hat and sunglasses. Then I noticed my reflection in the car window and realized I was wearing a filthy, crushed white summer sun hat that was bent into a very odd shape. At first I smiled and then I started to laugh. I thought of your funniest screwups post. The more I thought about how ridiculous I looked the more I laughed.

Now the people were really staring at me. Never mind my respectable car, they must have thought I was a total mental case, laughing and wearing a ridiculous mis-shapen white hat while pumping gas in the freezing cold. Too bad I didn't have a bumper sticker saying "A tick ate my brain".

It really helps to be able to laugh at the situations Lyme keeps getting me into!

And even if it makes me hurt worse it also makes me feel better.

This poll has and will get me through many a long dark day, and with your permission I want to print it out for my own benefit and read when I am down.

This has truly been a God send.

By the way I was comparing notes with a fellow lymie yesterday and I thought I was the only one who had repeatedly picked up the remote and tried to dial a number and then get pissed because the d&^* thing won't work.

I t takes me some time to figure out what I am holding in my hand.

Get this I am resposible for taking care of my father as well as homeschooling my last two of only EIGHT children.

Now my dad is difficult to say the least and resents like he%% that I control his activities because he is not capable of making rational decisions.

Heaven help me if he ever gets ahold of this thread. I would loose all credibility.

All my kids think I'm funny. obviously they don't take my lyme rages seriuosly. Case in point.

One day during spring break a few years back we were living in an old farmhouse with a screened in front porch that my husband had just painstakingly rescreened the wire on.

My 7 & 9 year old sons had been fighting nonstop for the past 6 days and I had had it.

I had at one pint looked out the kitchen window to see said 9 year old running as fast as his chubby little legs would carry him carrying a bat over his head.

Now you know what his intentions were. Said 7 year old was one step in front of him running as fast as his little legs would allow and I running as fast as my old beat up legs woud go caught the bat just as it was about to do serious bodily harm.

After they were finally allowed to go back outside (I made them sit in the living rooom holding hands and looking at each other until they got over being mad) I heard coming from the front porch a loud bang, bang, bang!

They were ramming their bycycles into the recently in one piece newly screened in door.

That was it. I, screaming like a banshee and swearing to kill them picked one up under each arm completely impressing them by mother's he man strength and literally threw them at the same time on their seperate beds all the while screaming to the top of my lungs they were dead meat

I even turned it upside down and started to get really flustered. The key was way to big for the lock hole. I could hear my cat on the other side of the door meowing for me to come in but I couldn't get in...

I was soon sweating and wondering if my landlord had changed my lock without telling me. I tried once more, but no go.

Out of sorts, I walked back to my car still gripping the key in my hand like a mad woman. And recollecting that "YES" I was current with the rent!

After successfully opening my car door, I realized I had used the same key. How can this be I thought?

What in the world was going on? My apartment key would open my car but not my apartment? How bizzare. Surely there must be some mistake. Was I in the twilightzone..YES I thought I was.

I went back up to the apartment door and tried the key again this time looking carefully at it. No go...

But it just worked on the car door surely it has to work here.(great lyme logic)No it still wouldn't work, try as I might to open the door with it.

Looking at it suddenly I realized after a few minutes that it was my car key.......

It not even similar to the apartment key. It was a really big key with a hard plastic coating typical of import cars...no similarity there..

Wow....major lyme moment...but I was very happy to finally greet my cat who looked relieved that I finally managed to get my lymeself in the door.

daniella

My Doctor's office is about 45 minutes from my home, but only 15 from my office, so I try to schedule appointments on workdays. I had an appointment Monday, all day I was writing and editing my current symptom list (Which, by the way, is down to 3/4 of a page, from 2 1/2 pages just two months ago! Yay!)

Thinking of what I needed to discuss with her. Reminding myself that I needed to leave work early.

Left work early, got in the car, and went straight home-opposite direction- still thinking of all the things I needed to be sure to discuss.

When I finally realized, I called in a panic to apologize- she was very understanding, thank goodness!

____________________________________________

This is the story I told that convinced my Doc that I'd lost my poor fool mind.

Getting ready to go worship on Sunday, decided to wear my nice black velvet dress. Couldn't find my black dress shoes anywhere. Realized they might be in the car, went out the door, slipped on my old, muddy, disgustingly beat up brown garden clogs.

Got to the car and couldn't remember what I was looking for.

Just then my Dad drove up and asked if I wanted a ride, so I got in the car with him and left.

Only realized the funky combination of garden clogs so ugly I wouldn't wear them to the mailbox and my beautiful black velvet dress when I got some funny looks...

Borrowed Dad's car, hurried back home. Almost home when I realized I didn't have a house key. Or my drivers license, for that matter.

My friend was taking care of me and he'd put me on a bed in the livingroom (closer to the bathroom than my own room) in front of the tv. He then went to make dinner. I tried to watch tv but didn't get any of it. He then came back from the kitchen and I started to scream because I thought he was a burglar (didn't remember anyone else was in the house).

He calmed me down and gave me a plate of sliced up pizza and a fork. I kept watching tv. Everytime he tried to turn my attention to my dinner, I'd stare at it for a couple of seconds, look away and see the tv again, and keep staring at the tv.

He turned of the tv and I just kept staring at the black screen, not noticing much of a difference. It ended up with him putting a table cloth over the turned of tv to keep me from being distracted.

So then he gave me the fork again. I held it the wrong way and used it to point at the ceiling (there were lots of interesting things on the ceiling, I wouldn't be able to tell you what exactly but I've wondered about them for weeks and wanted him to explain them to me, hence the pointing).

So he took the fork, turned it around, put it in my hand again. I saw the forked part for the first time and stared in awe. He then decided it would save a lot of time if he'd just feed me. Sometimes it would take over an hour, because I'd forget after swallowing what I was eating, and demanded to know. When he said what it was I wanted to know if there was anything in it I'm allergic to.

Strangest thing was � could remember the whole list of things I'm allergic to, but 5 seconds later I'd forgotten I'd asked and would ask about it again. Also I insisted I lived in the U.S. though I've never been there in my life. When they took me of the meds there were a few days where I could understand a bit more and started talking again. I developed a crush on one of the sesame street characters. It lasted three days but then on saturday sesame street wasn't on and I was depressed the whole day because my boyfriend had dumped me and I couldn't figure out why.

I then unhooked phone and hooked up another phone, same "problems" again. I then thought phone company had somehow stopped taking messages. I threw phone across room.

My daughter just happened to be standing at doorway watching all this. She ahem pointed out to me what I was actually doing. She thought it was hilarious, me I knew I was nuts. The reverse also happens, I try to use phone to supply pswd to computer. So now the phone rests about 5 feet away, so i don't get confused.

I needed to figure out the days meals so as soon as I got up I pulled a bunch of food out of the fridge and also took some frozen stew out of the freezer for dinner.

I put the frozen stew on the counter. Next I packed some leftovers in another container and put them in the the fridge to stay cold until leaving.

I chopped up vegetables and got them cooking for breakfast, I opened a can of tomatoes and used only 1/3. I got a container & lid to put the leftover tomatoes in and then I put everything back in the fridge.

While stirring the vegetables I noticed the tomatoes were still in the can on the counter, I was baffled since I had just put them in the fridge. I checked the fridge sure enough the tomato container was empty; I forgot to put the tomatoes in before closing the lid and putting it in the fridge

Just before I left I remembered to take my lunch. I grabbed the container and was surprised how cold it had gotten. It was nearly freezing and wet so I got some paper towels and wrapped it up. As I was walking out the door I noticed that I was carrying the frozen stew instead of my lunch.

I started driving with the radio off so I wouldn't be distracted but still managed to nearly miss 3 out of 4 exits and then really missed the 4th one.

I'm sure my fellow Lymies will relate to the huge amount of brain power required to figure out whether to go North or South at each exit. First I have to remember where I'm going, then to figure out which way it is I have to remember where I am. With only one mile warning for the exit there is barely enough time to figure it all out.

This is progress though, at least now I realize there is an exit and a decision to be made. I used to just keep on driving completely oblivious to the signs.