posted
I just read in my local paper of a woman from my town described as having "pretty serious Lyme Disease" by her son had gone missing on Easter Sunday.
I was going to come on here and see if there were any posts or news about it but decided to do a Google search of her name first. Sadly, she's been found dead in Rhinecliff, NY.
Article follows: No foul play in woman's death
Rhinecliff - A woman whose body was found along railroad tracks Wednesday north of the Rhinecliff train station was not a victim of foul play, the Dutchess County Sheriff's Office reported Thursday.
They identified the woman as Suzanne Lawrence, 62, of East Hampton, NY, who was reported missing on April 10.
Her body was found around 5 p.m. on April 11 on the banks of the Hudson River by fishermen.
The medical examiner's report stated the cause of death was due to medication and hypothermia. ``There is no reason to believe that there was any foul play or suspicious circumstances involved,'' said Det. Daren Cummings. ``We don't know why she was in the area, although family members said she was fond of Rhinebeck.''
Because of the proximity to the railroad tracks, authorities asked CSX Rail to show down train traffic during the onsite investigation. That took about 2 1/2 hours, police said.
Please say a prayer for this family and keep them in your thoughts.
-------------------- ~Kristina~
Posts: 173 | From Long Island ~ New York | Registered: Mar 2003
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Thanks for posting it (I hope you don't mind me linking it).
-------------------- more light, more love more truth and more innovation Posts: 3783 | From somewhere other than here | Registered: May 2005
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CaliforniaLyme
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 7136
posted
That is SO sad. It reminds me of a woman I know, her son died on a riverbank and I htink he may have had Lyme- I met him once and I heard about him every day because I worked with her and she talked endlessly and sweetly about him- she was crazy about him- Jude was a fisherman and his favorite place in the world was Nisene Mark State Park- and he fished only in that park and that is the highest Lyme place in CA- and he died in that park on the riverbank- he hit his head and I saw her and she told me that he had begun to have "memory and balance problems" and she was convinced this was why he died, that he had lost his balance and fallen- that he had been refusing to go to the doctor even though he had begun to lose his balance and fall- that he was so stubborn and wouldn't go to doctor even though she had become convinced he had a neurological disease- and I guess he fell into shallow water unconscious when he was knocked out by a rock after falling alone by the creek-
when I read the above article it was the first time I thought of him in years-
this was pre-my-Lyme but when I got Lymed and began to have balance and memory problems I thought of him-
Makes me wonder if that was what happened with her- if she fell & hit head & fell in water- I hope they find out- I am so sorry for her family- she was young-
62 is not old at all-!!! poor family- poor poor folks- best wishes, Sarah
-------------------- There is no wealth but life. -John Ruskin
All truth goes through 3 stages: first it is ridiculed: then it is violently opposed: finally it is accepted as self evident. - Schopenhauer Posts: 5639 | From Aptos CA USA | Registered: Apr 2005
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David95928
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 3521
posted
Stardantzer, Can you provide a reference? I am working on a paper. Thanks. David
-------------------- Dave Posts: 2034 | From CA | Registered: Jan 2003
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RHINECLIFF - The woman who was found dead on the Hudson River shore this week apparently committed suicide, police said on Thursday.
An autopsy concluded that Suzanne Lawrence, 62, of East Hampton, Long Island, died of a medication overdose and hypothermia, according to the Dutchess County Sheriff's Office.
Detective Jason Mark, the lead investigator in the case, said Lawrence was the subject of a missing-person report filed Tuesday in East Hampton and that local investigators found a note in Lawrence's car, near where her body was discovered, suggesting her death was imminent.
"It appears to be a goodbye kind of note," Mark said.
The note did not refer to suicide, but "there were some things in there where she was talking about her suffering," the detective said.
Police said almost immediately after Lawrence's body was found that her death did not appear to be the result of a crime.
The body, partially concealed by brush, was discovered by two fishermen about 5 p.m. Wednesday on the rocky shore of the river between the Rhinecliff train station and the Rhinebeck water-filtration plant, police said. The site is the end of Slate Dock Road.
Police did not say how long the body might have been there.
Mark said the contents of Lawrence's note and other documents found in her car indicated she had been ill for some time, though he didn't know what illness she might have had.
Mark also said there were empty prescription bottles both in the car and in Lawrence's possession and that there were pictures and other documents in the car.
Asked about Lawrence's connection to Northern Dutchess, police said she had friends in the area and enjoyed spending time outdoors.
The autopsy on Lawrence was performed Thursday at St. Francis Hospital in Poughkeepsie. Mark said authorities are awaiting the results of toxicology tests to determine the type and amount of medication in Lawrence's system when she died.
-------------------- ~Kristina~
Posts: 173 | From Long Island ~ New York | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
I, unfortunately can say I know how she must have felt. Sometimes there seems to be no way out of the misery, pain and suffering. No way out. It can truly be so very sad. A heartbreaking disease this lyme is....and very discouraging most days. At least for me. I say a prayer for her and that God has mercy.
-------------------- Corinne Posts: 529 | From Raleigh, NC | Registered: Jun 2006
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kam
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 3410
posted
My mind has been going there too lately. But, I figured it was just one of the many phases of this illness.
I do not think it is a solution.
I think the solution is to do what we can to fight this and help others who are going through this.
We need to educate and change people's perspectives on this...including unfortunately the medical field.
It was done with AIDS. We can do it too.
AS an undergrad Deaf ED student, they also have had to fight Goliath.
After they joined with another organization they were able to finally succeed.
I have seen a lot of improvement and progress since I was first aware of what was bugging me.
While reading Confronting Lyme, I read one story about a person who was able to get a pet scan to show what lyme had done to her brain.
This seemed to help get the help she needed.
Not sure where I am going with this.
I received a packet today regarding a hearing I have with my insurance for medication to fight this that they have denied.
AFter reading there reason for not providing the medication that they are presenting to the judge, I have been in tears this morning.
IT is a lot of things that are associated with this condition that we are in.
...But, loss of being able to be independent is tough too....financially, physically, mentally.
It is scary dealing with this and reading about those who have given up. Will we be one of the statistics or will be overcome this and be able to help others overcome it?
But, it is much better to read about those who are doing things to make a positive difference.
We need to hear from you.
Those that put out Lyme Times and other information.
The Lyme Disease Association.
We need a thread on the good things that are happening with lyme.
The continued support from this web site is priceless.
[ 13. April 2007, 07:33 PM: Message edited by: kam ]
Posts: 15927 | From Became too sick to work or do household chores in 2001. | Registered: Dec 2002
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You are right on both fronts. Yes, It is very scarey to read about someone who "gives up" because I am sure most of us deal with that more than we wish to admit.
And it becomes more real, when someone actually does it.ends it, that is. At least for me. And it also shows how utterly awful this disease is. How many illness are SO HORRIBLE that they cause a person to want to end their life? This is a very serious illness. Would be interesting to know the statistics of how many people with lyme resort to suicide compared to other illnesses. Maybe THAT would open the eyes of some medical professionals....don't know.
And you are also right, that we need, need, need the encouraging stories, the glimmers of hope and the positive feedback. Essential for our survival. Really is.
-------------------- Corinne Posts: 529 | From Raleigh, NC | Registered: Jun 2006
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posted
I think about it alot but have a 14 year old neice to keep me focused. Its funny, I was told by a friend that I should be glad I didn't have a terminal disease. My response is that it is terminal it just torments you forever before killing you or you are in so much pain and despire that you do take your life.
-------------------- NC PLEASE GIVE US THE MEDICAL HELP LYME DISEASE SUFFERS NEED!!!
Rhonda Posts: 24 | From Mount Holly, NC 28120 | Registered: Apr 2007
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Vermont_Lymie
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9780
posted
Very sorry to hear about Ms. Lawrence. I wish we, the lymenet community, could have helped her.
Posts: 2557 | From home | Registered: Aug 2006
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klutzo
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 5701
posted
Cordor, I'm sorry my Lyme brain can't remember where I read this, but I read that 20% of Lyme patients end up killing themselves. That is higher than major depression, with it's 15% suicide rate.
Strangely, I also read that most Lyme suicides occur in the earlier stages, when the contrast between your new "living death" and the previously vibrant life you've lost is still fresh in your mind. I never thought about suicide back then, because I still had hope.
I readily admit that I think about it every day, and tell those close to me that I wish I had the guts to do it. I am too afraid that: a) there might be punishment for trying to play God, or b) I might botch it and end end up a vegetable.
Klutzo
Posts: 1269 | From Clearwater, Florida, USA | Registered: May 2004
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dontlikeliver
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 4749
posted
Klutzo,
Do you have any reference for where you read about the 20% statistic?
DLL
Posts: 2824 | From The Back of Beyond | Registered: Oct 2003
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MagicAcorn
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 8786
posted
Klutzo,
For me it came much later than early stage. It was more the realization of having to go through what I endured once before that got me.
It had nothing to do with missing my former life. It had to do with the finacial aspects, remembering the pain I endured getting better, and the prospects of a severe bout of pelvic lyme once again.
I knew from Dr. Bleiweiss what was wrong with me so I never gave in. Knowledge gives you the power to rationalize even frightening things like suicide.
It was more two of my friends who had commmited suicide that kept me sane. All the living I had done since they had past made me realize how much I would miss if I did do myself in.
That and giving birth to my little lymenut. If he hadn't been born maybe I wouldn't be here. However, leaving a toddler (he is now ten) with lyme disease behind with my husband with little personal experience with the disease was never really an option.
I had severe guilt, and sometimes still do over being sick while pregnant. My son has had many hurdles to overcome. He is lucky to have me in a way because we have the same illness. So I know what the little nut is going through and know for a fact he isn't faking when wierd symptoms pop up.
I seriously have thought of it. One night I even drove around so distraught, crying uncontrollably, and fighting back the urge to just floor it and drive into the Long Island Sound. This is not an exaggeration I actually was that bad.
My doctor saved my life! He got me to open up about my emotional state, and prescribed biaxin and wellbutrin. He didn't pat me on the head and say poor Acorn toughen up and be a big girl. He gave me something for the depression and for the cause of the depression.
Suzanne is from my area and I wondered if we had ever met. I've been around a little bit in the lyme world. I either got lyme in South Hampton, or Upstate New York. She was my neighbor in a way, and I was very touched by this personally. I even know the location of where she was found as we both love the Hudson Valley Area, besides the East End.
This is a plea to anyone out there who is afraid to tell their doctor they need help - not to be. If you are then you are seeing the wrong doctor.
Anyone who needs an ear to listen I am here. This is one topic I wish I didn't feel I have some personal experience with, but I do.
If you ever feel friendless then let me be your friend. I don't discriminate, I don't hold grudges, and I promise to uphold your confidences.
klutzo
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 5701
posted
Dear Don't Like Liver, Sorry, as I said in the very first sentence of my post, I can't remember where I read that statistic. It was years ago. Like any stats, it could be wrong, but based on my 10 yrs. of running an FMS support group before I got dx'd with Lyme, I'd say it's about right (if you accept that most FMS is Lyme, as I do).
- - - - - - - - - - - - -- -- -
Dear Acorn, I have often thought that having kids and grandkids is what keeps many people here on earth when things are overwhelmingly difficult. I agree that you must try to hang in there for them. I don't have any.
In fact, my whole family is dead, except for my husband, and I am ruining his future. He will never be able to retire because I can't work, and he has a heart condition and does hard, physical work. His father did not believe in my illness and disinherited him. I am so ill that we have had to give up our social life. I would not be missing much. I love nature, but am too ill to go out and enjoy it. I would rather go back to my real home on the other side.
I have had plenty of "help". All it did was add to the financial burden and my guilt. I also am a former psychiatric social worker myself so I know the drill. I do have friends who still email me all the time and tell me I have much to live for. They mean well, but really have no clue what life with 21 years of tertiary Lyme with no tx can be like.
Best wishes to you and your little "nut",
Klutzo
Posts: 1269 | From Clearwater, Florida, USA | Registered: May 2004
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posted
The truth is that thoughts like these are entirely understandable. But part of what keeps me going is knowing that others, like those who posted on this thread, are still hanging on, in spite of all the reasons to quit.
Apart from the sorrow about someone like this who found it all too much and quit, that we couldn't help her, it is also frightening to realize our resolve to fight on is shaken by such a case. In other words, sorrow for her, fear for us.
Everybody---keep fighting please, not just for your own sake, but for ours too. Maybe if we all join hands and keep swimming, fewer will go under. And consider becoming an activist, if you aren't already.
Posts: 8430 | From Not available | Registered: Oct 2000
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posted
I have consider killing myself many times. I suffer from PTSD, Bi Polar, Fibromyalgia, and Chronic Lyme. All of the above cause a great deal of depression. Fortunately I have a great conselor that REALLY cares about me. I also have a 14 year old neice that is my life. I can't leave her here without me. I am a rock in her life like she is mine. I don't have kids either. I am not married and I live alone. I have always wanted kids but know I can't handle one. I have been afraid to have kids because of the disease. Now I have had to have a hysterectomy-FINAL- no kids. I have considered adoption but know I can't handle it and probably would not get approved: Single with Lyme, no way. I did "adopt" the love of my life, Tink. She is a little Maltese. She is awsome. She loves me so much I can't believe it. If one of us dies they will have to bury us both. A PA at Dr. J's office actually wrote me a prescription for her. Best medicine I have ever had. Maltese are known for their ability to be Therapy Dogs. They know when you are sick and will stick to you like glue. I recommend a Maltese for anyone who is sick and needs a friend night and day.
As for the bible I believe killing yourself is the ultimate sin, you have no time to repent. I also don't want to play GOD. I keep holding on to what the bible says: all things work together for good. I hold to this fact and am trying to make something good out of this.
I to have considered hitting the gas pedal. One night I heard a voice telling me to take pills and end it. My counselor told me she didn't think the drugs I had would kill me just fry my brain. I brought my drugs in the next visit and she turned pale. Yea, I had more than enough to kill myself. Another time I was rounding a curve going home from work. Alot of construction was going on in the area. A gravel truck rounded the curve on my side of the road. I thought for just a second not to respond, the impact would have killed me, this was my opportunity. I finally responed and he barely missed me, wasn't my time yet.
I hold on to my faith, my neice and Tink to make it through. I make it second by second minute by minute. I am sure most of you do the same.
Keep safe and trust in God. Remember, This to shall pass.
-------------------- NC PLEASE GIVE US THE MEDICAL HELP LYME DISEASE SUFFERS NEED!!!
Rhonda Posts: 24 | From Mount Holly, NC 28120 | Registered: Apr 2007
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posted
Each time I read these articles and the comments by each of you, I am reminded of how close I come to the kind of despair that this woman must have felt.
I feel so much for her and her agonizing decision and the family that is left behind.
Like many of you, I think of suicide often. My daughter is now college aged and could do okay without me. She was the one thing that kept me going for years, kept me holding on.
I think what keeps me from actually doing anything is the experience that my family had when my grown niece's husband killed himself. He was a Vietnam vet and had a hard time when they were having marital problems. None of our lives have been the same since, the effects are devastating and ripple on for years. In all the pain and depression, I am thankful that I can still hold on to the fact that I don't want to do that to my family again. I pray that I continue to feel that way. And I'm so sad for the people that believe that they can't go on.
Many prayers for her family and to each of you.
Posts: 460 | From Illinois | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
I understand how you feel but even though your daughter can get along wthout she would be devastated without you. Keep your eyes turned upward. There is where you find strength. I see a counselor often and she helps me stay focused. Without her I would feel like you, that my family can get along without me. I know down deep in my heart though that my neice Aleigha would be devastated. I am such a vital part of her life she would never be the same without me. I love her to much to leave her right now. My biggest fear is that this disease will cause me to get to the point that I can no longer see or feel her. I take advantage of every second I have with her. She is my heart and soul.
-------------------- NC PLEASE GIVE US THE MEDICAL HELP LYME DISEASE SUFFERS NEED!!!
Rhonda Posts: 24 | From Mount Holly, NC 28120 | Registered: Apr 2007
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Your words are so true. I know that my daughter needs me and my husband continually reminds me of that also. I often think it is some sort of defense mechanism that I tell myself that I make no difference and wouldn't be missed. That makes it easier for me to discount the people in my life.
I'm sure my niece's husband thought the same thing. On several occasions he said that fighting in Vietnam was what made him feel expendable. He said once you are trained as a soldier and prepare yourself to die that it was a hard concept for him to forget.
Anyway, thanks for the encouraging words. Your niece is a lucky girl. And to share my dog interests with you, I had a Maltese mixed mutt dog for 12 years and I know what you mean about their personalities. Maggie would sit by me, crawl up on me if I was crying, just a constant loving companion. I had to put her down last summer and my chocoate lab after Christmas. It has been a hard year in regards to the dogs and probably part of this funk. I still have a westie who is my comedy relief dog. They are such precious souls, still there even after the human friends have dropped off.
Hang in there with me.
Posts: 460 | From Illinois | Registered: Aug 2005
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