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» LymeNet Flash » Questions and Discussion » General Support » Author PJ Langhoff court update

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Author Topic: Author PJ Langhoff court update
lymelighter2
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There has been a new development in the on-going family court drama for author PJ Langhoff ("The Forgotten", and "The Singing Forest") and founder of www.lymeleague.com (a patient site for lyme stories) and www.sewill.org, a regional lyme support group and web site.

For those who are interested in following the story.

Yesterday, through no real fault of my own, I had my remaining custodial rights stripped from me, due to more discrimination in the Walworth County WI family court system.

Recently, our attorney of the past 3 years, quit our case after telling us that he was "sick of our case, and sick of the over-litigiousness of the opposing counsel". In the process of doing that, he neglected to inform my husband and I that we had a court hearing to attend on May 23rd, which we subsequently missed. An nteresting
sidenote is that we were actually IN the courthouse on the same day, retrieving paperwork for the attorney we were trying to hire, to
cover the one who quit the case cold turkey without any notice, only days before a status hearing.

At the end of the book "The Singing Forest", I touched briefly upon a process where the opposing counsel had the courts order an independent medical examination be performed despite several
psychiatric evaluations already being submitting proving I have no mental illness.

Counseling appointments were made, but the center gave me a hard time about needing a p.m. appointment, because I live 2 hours from the
center, can't drive, can't eat and have difficulty travelling due to my lyme disease. Additionally, I told them that my brain and body don't function well in the a.m. and that I spend a good portion of the morning in the bathroom and have medications that cause me to be ill during that time of day. They responded with anger, and called and cancelled my appointment with the doctor due to my "requiring all these special concessions" and apparently discussed my "attitude" with the opposing counsel at length. At no time did I ever even have
a conversation with the doctor who cancelled the appointment. Go figure.

IN court, the lying opposing counsel got the new judge's attention first by providing his version of our court case's lengthy history, which of course was carefully fabricated to leave out his client's motions but to highlight ours.

In the process, the judge brought up not once, but twice, my recent bankruptcy (filed to relieve $187,000 in medical and legal bills we could no longer pay for), though he said "this really doesn't have to do with anything" he discussed it not once but twice.

The opposing counsel went on to say that I was "thumbing my nose at the court" which is absolutely untrue. Requiring a late-morning appt.
due to a medical disability is hardly thumbing one's nose.

Nevertheless, we were not even given an opportunity to speak at the 15 minute hearing because the opposing counsel was given the floor
despite their motion only being a counter-motion. Our discussion was never allowed.

The judge fined me $550.87 payable in 14 days for the other side "having costs" from my "refusal to appear" at the May 23rd hearing for which I was never notified to attend.

And the judge gave my ex temporary sole custody and removed my summer visitation placement and reduced my placement to 2 weekends per month
from 3, and removed some holidays as well.

This type of discrimination and treatment of disabled people is an abomination and needs to be exposed. I cannot do it because I run the
risk of losing yet another attorney to the process.

I contacted the ACLU but they will likely require a referral from an attorney, which all previous counsel has refused to do because they don't want to be in the center of a political firestorm.

In the meantime, my children have no mother, live with a father who lies, manipulates and cheats his way around an ignorant court system
who will not acknowledge lyme disease or disabilities.

By the way, this ought to sit well with some folks. The judge mocked my attorney's claims about my requiring an a.m. appointment because I
quote "don't function very well in the mornings and they are made difficult due to my lyme and my medications." The judge looked at us
and said "well, she's here now" (it was 8:15 am) "she should be able to go to her appointments". (basically you don't look sick)

I had been very sick all morning, had 3 bathroom trips before the hearing, and one afterwards. I was shaking during the hearing and the attorney commented on it. It went ignored by the judge. Outside the court building in the vestibule, I had what we are pretty sure was a seizure and fainted. Yes there were witnesses, including my exhusband and his attorney, who looked at me and walked away.

We were also ordered to immediately sign the medical authorizations for the second time, so my ex's attorney can dumpster-dive in my medical records to try to fabricate some sort of mental illness, and I was ordered to return to the counselor who cancelled my appointment and have him evaluate me---I'm certain he will be unable to remain objective given the past history.

Disabled? Yes. Discriminated against? Yes. Supported? No. We have a long uphill battle to get anyone to see that I am being railroaded by
my ex and his attorney in the Walworth County family court.

If anyone has any useful ideas or wants to help us out, it would be more than appreciated.

PJ Langhoff
[cussing] [loco]

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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lou
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I'm very sorry. It seems that when lymies mothers do not get support from husbands, they are very badly treated by govt and courts. Speaking now of your ex. This keeps happening.
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lymelighter2
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Too true Lou, and not only do the kids have lyme, but I do too. So the entire family is being treated poorly. And the kids aren't getting treated at all, their father won't acknowledge that they have lyme, despite their WB tests, the diagnosis from the doctor, and such.

He has made claims that I am sucking the children into my "delusion" of illness; which is part of why they are claiming that I am mentally ill.

Boy are all of them going to be sitting there with egg on their faces when it is proven that there is no mental illness at all.

They won't have a case. So why are they wasting all the time and energy? Because they are cruel and the court system doesn't know any better.

There is still that "you don't look sick" philosophy, and despite diagnoses, paperwork supporting illness, governmental disability paperwork and the like, disabled people are being squished like little bugs. We don't have any rights at all.

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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seibertneurolyme
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This is one of those cases where it seems like you need to call in the big guns so to speak.

If this was me I would contact Columbia University and specifically Dr B.F. and request a SPECT scan and full psych eval.

Would also contact Dr V.S.

http://www.thehumansideoflyme.net

Maybe one or both of these physicians would be willing to help. I really feel like you need to have some expert witnesses who can educate the judge and court system.

I think it is time that there was a high profile case that could set precedent for other similar cases.

Hubby had 3 psych admits early in his illness and that greatly influenced future physicians and made diagnosis much more difficult and less believable to many docs. He hasn't had anywhere near the problems you have had, but I can certainly understand where you are coming from.

Good luck.

Bea Seibert

P.S. Corrected website -- should work now.

[ 08. June 2006, 03:49 PM: Message edited by: seibertneurolyme ]

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lymelighter2
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Thanks Bea, sent you a P.M. Also tried the link for the doctor, but the web page is not up. Any idea how to contact this individual? Don't know who he/she is or where he/she is located.

Thank you

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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bettyg
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pj, so sorry to hear the latest in your ongoing true saga! When it rains, it pours, and you have been FLOODED for quite some time.

Please post your link here about your book, The Singing Forest, I'm up to page 120 of 200 pages. I can't put it down; it's so interesting, and I love your writing style.

I put a suggestion in your link about ALL members contacting their LOCAL LIBRARIES about ordering your book. Many are like my local library, and their FISCL YEAR ends 6-30-06; so they are spending any LEFT OVER money.

I gave my library a request 10-15 days ago; your NEW book came in Mon. or Tues.

I also love the pages, you turn it over & don't have to worry about missing a page due to the thickness of it.

PJ, great job writing it.

I love Bea's suggestions to you.

Another suggestion I have is contacting IOWA SENATOR TOM HARKIN'S OFFICE. He was responsible for getting the DISABILITIES ACT going/passed.

Go to his congress web site, and look for his form letter. His staff replies by EMAIL now, and I have had a ONE DAY TURN AROUND of writing ... receiving his reply SAME day!

Perhaps they might have some other suggestions for you pj. Good luck on your never-ending battle.

I see the 2nd book in the works already with yur continuing story. Bettyg

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Cucamonga
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Hi there!

I think Betty G's idea of contacting Tom Hartman is a great one...you can't speak with TH but someone in his office will pick up and try to help...

BY THE WAY--if you go on Google and do a search for Berkely Bedell--a former congressman from Iowa (and friend of Hartman) who got HEALED of LD--naturally--his story is very interesting, and I even spoke to him... I saw Hartman speaking on a show years ago about a friend who had LD and got healed, naturally...I found him (he's in Florida) and spoke to him...very nice man...

Good luck!

--------------------
Cucamonga

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Ann-OH
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My first thought was to contact your state representative and state senator, since the courts you are dealing with are state courts.

You could also contact your Federal Representative and Senator - in Wisconsin, right?

Heres a hug,
Ann - OH

--------------------
www.ldbullseye.com

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lymelighter2
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Thanks all, Betty, thanks for your kind words. YOu can post a review of the book at www.lulu.com/lyme and click on the book, then click on the "post review" but you have to sign onto the site to post, some people don't want to do that.

I'm not sure what IA's legislators could do for me, because I'm in WI, but my Representative Tom Petri (who I met with in April and got him to cosponsor the ALERT ACT-the only Rep. from WI TO DO THAT SO FAR...YEAH TOM!) told me about Mr. Bedell having to quit his job in Washington years ago because of lyme disease. Its an interesting story I bet. I'm innundated right now with stuff to handle court-wise but yes, the court-case book "Eyes of Pain" has been in the works for the past 3 years and won't be completed until our court case is. Right now I'm working on a different book, "The Tinfoil Hat, Surviving Life's Challenges by Using Your Personal Protective Powers". Its a book about recovering self-esteem largely by using "NO" as a power-limiter.

Any way, the ideas and suggestions are very helpful, it lets me know that people out here care, and are good ideas. Anyone who wants to help me fight this has a standing place on my "committee" LOL. Its an uphill battle in WI court, but in the long run, the truth will come out, either in the court room or in book form, and hopefully it will illuminate the dark hallways that are currently the standard for treating disabled people in the family courts.

My poor kids though have really been put through a lot. Me too, but I'm an adult and can handle it.

PJ

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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lymelighter2
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By the way,

Thanks Betty. My two published books can be purchased at:

www.lulu.com/lyme

"The Singing Forest, A Journey Through Lyme Disease" and "Right Behind You, Spritual Helpers From Beyond the Earth Plane" are both easy reads, and I think quite fun adventures, both true.

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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pigwit
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I would like to give you some support and offer a few thoughts about your situation.

As I'm sure you know, kids have their primary attachment with their mother. I don't know the ages of your children, but obviously they need you to help meet emotional needs.

You are also the person who is most aware of their medical needs and are movitated to meet those needs.

When the needs of children are not met, the focus needs to be on meeting those needs. Very frequently, the focus is on blaming parents, even when it was nobody's fault.

Your ex obviously wants control, probably does not want to pay child support, and does not want blame put on him.

I haven't worked in your state, but have worked in other places where the system did not work well. Sometimes the system goes after the easiest targets. For example, children might be taken from a young single mom that is struggling to pay the bills. A father that is physically abusive and intimidating to social workers might be ignored as much as possible. Parents get labeled.

I have seen something relatively minor in how a mother parents her children be blown up and brought up repeatedly for years. With this attitude, it can be like a fishing expedition to find something on the parent to finally get a negative evaluation and kids permanently away from the parent.

It can be exhausting and expensive to get a psychological evaluation, substance abuse evaluation, parenting evaluation, another psychological evaluation and on and on.

This tends to wear a parent down and some parents can be convinced it is better for their children if they just give them up.

In the posts above, I saw some really good suggestions on how to get support on your side. This will help you overcome what seems like a "good old boy" system.

This involves not overly reacting to attacks on you. Attacks on you are a diversion from what the children's needs are and how best to meet them. Attacks may be designed to agitate you and get you off track. They are just trying to set you up.

The children's attachment with you could be strained due to physical health issues, being away from you, influence of their father, etc. You could take some control by pushing for family therapy for you and the kids. It would be helpful to get a therapist on your side. This could be one way of taking the offensive.

If you undergo an evaluation, I would suggest limiting how much you blame others. It usually works best to just be yourself and be honest.

It will be great if your attorney will get 100% behind you. An indication would be in how your attorney reacts to the possibility of you having expert witnesses, etc.

Can you visualize all of this falling in place? I will be cheering for you.

Pigwit

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NP40
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Hey Kid ! Hang in there, it'll all turn one day.
Here's the link for Columbia and Doc F.
http://www.columbia-lyme.org/

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bettyg
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Cucamonga, it's Tom HARKIN not Hartman...easy error.

Tom Harkin had actor Christopher Reeve come to Iowa to support him for reelection. Chris spoke in front of congress many times to Tom's committee. At the moment, I can't remember WHICH OF HIS COMMITTEES he's chair of!

pj's ex has custody of their kids, and has turned them against her. They've had counseling galore.

PJ, it's a miracle you have any sanity left; your ex was a real "loser" and what he continues to do is just beyond belief in th court/school systems.

After I finish you book, I'll give it a review, and then reread it for the stuff I missed the 1st time in my last 3 days of reading it. Should finish it TONIGHT after I get off her.

Thanks for showing the link here so folks can read about it too.
Bettyg

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bettyg
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http://www.tomharkin.com/contact/

pj, above is the direct link to contact Tom.

Tom is on 2 health committees:

Health & Human Services
Health, Education,........

Bettyg

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lymelighter2
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Thank you all for your kind words. I am not sure if everyone knows what this family has already been through, I will try to summarize it here.
I had custody and placement for nearly 6 years post divorce. I was remarried in 2000 and in 2001 my ex filed for reversal of custody by false allegations of child abuse that were proven not to have happened. Because of attrocious errors by social services, the GAL and judges/family court commissioners in our case, my ex's attorney was able to create a negative paper trail that has for a long time, not accurately reflected our case and my activities.

The truth in family court is rarely ever exposed or even discussed. We have had counseling galore, the children recanted their lies to counselors and it was read into the trial but the judge ignored it. My children were recommended they be split up. My daughter didn't want to leave me. My son was young and wanted the presents his father promised him.

As a result, I refused to let my children be sacrificed and the courts sent both to my ex. He continued to torture me via whatever contempt motions he could arrange. His fabrication of documents and overt lies on the stand caused me to be held in contempt several times, adding to the "pattern" of bad behavior on my supposed part.

The attorneys we have had have mostly jumped ship after a year of working because the opposing counsel is impossible to make any headway on our case. And yet as recently as this week I came under fire by an ignorant judge because my ex's attorney claimed in court that I had "run-ins" with all of my attorneys which is not true.

I have been falsely arrested for supposedly throwing myself in front of my ex's vehicle when he tried to run me over for simply attempting to give my child his medication.

I have suffered physical, verbal and emotional abuse for YEARS at the hands of my exhusband who has mental problems of his own.

I have already dealt with 14 years of lyme disease and coinfections (12-1/2 undiagnosed). My children are sick and I am unable to treat them thanks to my ex and the courts. They continue to be sicker. My daughter was already ED'd out of school and sent to a mental hospital for suicidal/homicidal postings on the internet threatening her school columbine-style for which I was the only parent intelligent enough to see and do something about. For this I am continually ridiculed and called mentally ill.

Yes I continue to fight. We are lining up expert LLMD's as witnesses for both lyme and my mental health. I have already bought and paid for several psych profiles and exams at my expense to prove mental health.

The court is allowing my ex to order yet another independent IME....I don't blame anyone, that is the truth of our case and the way that it is.

The children do love me but are tired of the crap that their father perpetrates on them (and me.) We have spent years and hundreds of thousands of dollars in the courts trying to defend me, which is a losing battle. I do know that at some point the truth will come out, whether it does in court or not, I really don't know. I am well-adjusted enough to know that the children will be mature one day and see the truth of the matters here.

The problems are that my ex continually batters me negatively by whatever means he can in order to continue the momentum he and his attorney have already created, as a smoke screen to draw attention away from where it belongs, upon him so noone will notice what a shi**y job he has done parenting these children.

Now he has temporary custody and placement and I have no parental rights whatsoever. Somebody has to continue to fight this A-hole and win back the rights for my children to be well.

what better advocate do my children have except for me?

I do this for them, because I love them and because they deserve so much more than they have received from their father and the court systems.

Support from everyone is absolutely essential for me right now, it can be overwhelming, but I continually look to the future and reflect on the grace that has allowed me to come this far.

Peace
PJ

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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kelmo
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I have spent the past hour just reading your story and posts. It breaks my heart what you have gone through. Those of you who are pioneers in the disease are breaking the ice with the tops of your heads.

We get some rolling eyes and disbelief, but nothing...I mean nothing...what many of you have endured.

I want more than anything for things to work out for you. This stress can't be helping the healing process.

Bless you.

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bettyg
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up; I finished your book last night and will reread it over again before I return to the library ... .jut couldn't put it down.
Bettyg

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lymelighter2
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quote:
Originally posted by kelmo:

I want more than anything for things to work out for you. This stress can't be helping the healing process.

Bless you.

Thanks for the kind words. Healing process? What healing process? You are correct. I should have been healed long ago. First the stress of having lyme and nobody listening to me for 12-1/2 years, and 13 years of putting up with an abusive hubby I divorced, then 9 years of post-divorce stress...and another 3 years to go. Hmm maybe then I can concentrate on actually getting better. Now there's a thought.

Anyway, his antics are designed to create a blizzard of paperwork and take attention away from him. He will get what he deserves, in court or in some other karmic way, I'm certain of that.

Thank you for caring.

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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lymelighter2
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quote:
Originally posted by bettyg:
up; I finished your book last night ...just couldn't put it down.
Bettyg

Thanks Betty my friend. I'm working on my third book, "The Tinfoil Hat, Surviving Life's Challenges by Using Your Personal Protective Powers". Its a book about abuse in its many forms and learning the proper use of the word "no". I hope it does well also. Take care

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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pigwit
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I just had an idea. Why couldn't some attorneys be encouraged to become LLJD's? (Lyme Literate Juris Doctor)

(Juris Doctor is the degree most attorneys in the USA have.) I would describe an LLJD as an attorney who; 1)understands the medical issues of Lyme disease; 2)honestly cares about his/her clients; 3)can handle the pressure of going against the present system; 4)has the vision to help effect changes in the governmental, medical, and other systems.

I'm a newby, but obviously Lyme Disease is an epidemic in a rapidly expanding area of the country. Maybe a wave of LLJD would help wake up the government and the general public. . .and create some justice for individuals.

Pigwit

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lymelighter2
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Pigwit,
Wish I knew one. After witnessing my fainting spell at the courthouse, my new attorney just may become one. He sees first hand that what I am telling is the truth. He fights for his clients, I only hope he can do better than the previous 5 or 6 attorneys we have had over the past 8 years.

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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bettyg
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up...
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lymelighter2
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I wrote to my Senators and Rep. and Senator Harkin. I will have to wait and see. I also contacted the ACLU No answer yet.

I really don't think anybody will actually do anything though, sad to say, because Walworth County is the only county in the State of Wisconsin that does not voluntarily participate in the state's judicial oversight committee, can't find the acronym for them, that is what I have been told. So who answers for the courts that won't answer for themselves I wonder?

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

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NP40
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Paula, you could try the WI. State Attorney General's Office if you feel there has been unethical behavior on the part of the judge or opposing counsel. They can vigorously investigate and prosecute these types of cases.

Sometimes, these smaller counties and townships establish almost their own little feifdom. The SAG does frown upon this and can compel them to follow the law.

I'd keep a detailed log of interaction with your ex as well. Phone calls, meetings, etc. Perhaps, tape record or video tape any interactions ?

I'd assemble all the research on the neuro effects of lyme that I could. Columbia may be a good start. I believe in WI. children are allowed to live with the parent of their choosing when they reach the age of 14.

Your ex's modus operandi is to always keep you on the defensive. The best defense is a good offense. Maybe a private investigator ? I'm sure cost would be a big factor in that.

As often happens in divorce cases one spouse uses the children as a hammer to get back at another spouse. False accusations of abuse, restraining orders or whatever the market will bear to seek a measure of revenge. Unfortunately, there's only one "true" adult involved in this situation.

Narcissistic, vengeful people will get into a "get even at all costs" mode. The swirl of emotion covering such activity covers for their own inadequacies which they will never face.
In their minds, their never wrong, refuse to heed other's advice or guidance.

The one redeeming thing about all this for you is that the children will see these character flaws as they age. In time, the one thing he most wanted-having the children hate "you", will ultimately backfire and they'll grow distant from him. I've seen it many times.

Posts: 1632 | From Northern Wisconsin | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lymelighter2
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NP
Been there done that on all accounts, though the attorney general's office likely won't do anything either.

Hired p.i. years ago

Interactions? There have been none, not for the past 3 years except for 3 occasions, no words were spoken. Del always hangs up the phone on me, no matter what.

There is no law in WI that dictates where children are to live. Despite my kids saying they wanted to live with me, they were sent to live with their Dad. There is no advocate for the children in that county.

There has been nothing but unethical behavior on the part of various judges, the attorney for the opposing counsel, and some of the hired court people. The GAL recommended a change in placement because he said I had a full plate.

The social worker claimed my eyes were full of pain, I had a flat expression and we lived in a changing urban environment. As far as I have seen, there are no statutes that allow a change in placement over those "crimes".

The latest endeavors had the judge remove any remaining custodial rights because of what the opposing counsel said which wasn't even true, once again. And once again I have no rights in this state, nor do my children. My ex's attorney stood up there and told the judge one of my children 'doesn't even want to see me', which is hogwash.

There is very little I can do when the judge won't even give us the floor to begin with, and we were the ones who filed the motion!!!

The "new" attorney we had to hire last minute because the other "new" attorney we tried to hire had sat on our paperwork for 2 weeks then 2 days before the hearing politely declined to take the case.....has also jumped ship from what we can tell. This attorney has $2,000 of our money, and hasn't returned any phone calls or my email since the hearing where he clearly saw he was over his head.

So now I have to also recover the $2,000 I borrowed from my brother-in-law to afford a last-minute attorney who also bailed, and go and find another new attorney who might a.) actually take our case longer than 1 day, and b.) actually might speak up on my behalf

When it rains it pours. Its a wonder I'm still here. Thank God my life has basically sucked an egg all my life so it taught me "this too shall pass", though a bit faster would be good.

I'm sooooooooo looking forward to the "independent" medical examination that is being done by the biased forensic psychologist that already a.) cancelled my last appointment and b.) was abusive to me on the phone when he had never even met or spoken to me before. Yeah right, he'll be objective. This is a lose-lose situation.

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

Posts: 139 | From A tiny little home office in the middle of Wisconsin | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
bettyg
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char
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PJ,

I am sooo sorry to hear that you are involved in this type of fight for your own children.

I do want to encourage you that worse case scenario, that even if this continues; truth and justice is on your side.

Your children will eventually see their father for what he has unfortunately become and view the situation for what it truly is.

My family was divided throughout my childhood and I alternately clung to one then the other for survival depending on the circumstances. Not sure where your kids are on this, but the truth ALWAYS comes out.

I hope you can find a way to take care of yourself at this time. Very important as you are in a marathon.

Char

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lymelighter2
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Thank you Char.

Yes its a marathon. I've been running them all my life, (tough circumstances) so I'm well trained, but then again Lyme is a marathon. Thank God for my horse. She keeps me sane and is my buddy.

Ex filed a new attempt at a contempt motion to keep his momentum going and fan the smoke screen.

This one probably coming in next week. Gee there's not much more they can take away. Don't suggest they have to prove contempt, not in that court. They can infer it and have no evidence at all, and win, that's how it goes down there, and how we've gotten into this mess.

Don't have a lawyer yet, working on that tomorrow. New one represented me one day and bailed along with our $2g retainer. That's 7g we're out. Not much left to do but pray.

Uggggghhhh support, support, support, support........

(runs away screaming aaaarrrrrrggggghhhhh)


"If You're going through hell, keep going"
--Winston Churchill [dizzy]

--------------------
PJ

www.LymeLeague.com"Together We Grow Stronger"

Posts: 139 | From A tiny little home office in the middle of Wisconsin | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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