posted
Well, I was pretty good at work before I got affected by my nuro lyme syptoms. I shared this bitterness with one of my coworkers (who is junior), and after a while, I can tell the change of attitude in her when she talks to me or even asks me questions. Just feeling that I'm not getting the respect I deserve...
And I had this feeling with a couple of other coworkers that I once "vented" with about my illness...
Maybe I'm being too sensitive, or I should focus more on my improvement other than others' attitude.
Posts: 196 | From atlanta/norcross, georgia | Registered: Feb 2007
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Geneal
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 10375
posted
I am sorry that your co-workers are so insensitive.
Of course, they really can't understand what you are going through and how functioning can be a struggle.
I think sometimes when people don't understand something they get defensive and maybe that is contributing to their behavior.
Please try not to let that negativity in.
You know you can come here anytime and share your good days and your bad.
I intensely dislike being patronized. I share my Lyme/co-infections only with people who are supportive or are curious enough to ask about it.
Share with us and other supportive people. Don't worry about what anybody else thinks.
What really matters is what you think.
I think anybody battling neuro-lyme and working is a hero!
Geneal
Posts: 6250 | From Louisiana | Registered: Oct 2006
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bejoy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11129
posted
Yeah, its got to be hard to be honest with people in the work environment! Sorry you are having a hard time!
What you deserve is kudos for how much harder you have to work than the average Jo. Instead, sometimes what you get is suspicion if you expose your vulnerabilities.
I often want to tell people in my communities how much I am struggling. At the same time, I don't want to be identified as a sick person.
I also don't want to be judged as a whiner if I pull it together and act as though I am energetic and full of life.
I agree with Geneal. This is a safe place to vent. Sniff, sniff, you guys understaaaaaand.
-------------------- bejoy!
"Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Posts: 1918 | From Alive and Well! | Registered: Feb 2007
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posted
Hey, I'm new to this whole thing and I find this forum such a safe haven from others.
I know exactly how you feel. Even your family can sometimes not really get it.
But the work force can be brutal. Even when you are not ill. You can be so vulnerable there.
I am sure it is twice as hard for you to do you job with Lyme. But we get it!!!
Hang in there!!!
Posts: 88 | From Carnation | Registered: Feb 2007
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MagicAcorn
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 8786
posted
I have two jobs. The first job I have almost two years now. I started as a volunteer there, and they knew I was sick. When someone left they asked me if I wanted to work there. As it helps pay into medicare and social security I said yes. My Lyme disease was of no consequence to them bless their hearts.
The second job I have just started three weeks ago. Since they are not paying medical I did not inform them of my Lyme. My Lyme is pretty much in check for the moment and if it acts up later I'll deal with it then.
Working is important for my well being. Having sympathy from my co workers is not. If anything it gives them ammunition later to blame even the slightest mistake on your illness. Whereas, if they do not know about your illness it would be chocked up to something else.
I've seen people raked over the coals over the years for being sick. It does not matter what you are suffering from. Your employer likes you as long as you perform. If sickness of any kind keeps you from performing the love affair is over.
I consider myself extremely lucky. My boss on the first job I mentioned here wants me working as it helps keep me in the loop of life. She even was a reference for me in my recent job search.
Everyone is different. Had my boss not known about my Lyme disease she may not have hired me. She saw how even sick I could still get my butt to work and do my job. She also saw how quickly things could turn around. She admired my work ethic.
I am not giving in and never have. I've had Lyme for ten + years now. I've had bad years and good years. I've set my life up now that even on my bad days I can still work. Neither of my jobs are physically demanding.
This works for me and I hope you find something that works for you.
-------------------- Posts: 1279 | From In hiding | Registered: Feb 2006
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bejoy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11129
posted
Fortunately for me, I am self employed, so I only need to deal with my clients, rather than co-workers and bosses.
I had a major issue about some problems at my daughter's school.
When I would try to meet with people the stress was significant.
I frequently had a physical melt down that left me shaking and tearful, even though I was not emotionally overwhelmed.
It put me in the position of appearing weak and submissive, when I was trying to come on as assertive and strong.
So I tried to explain the reaction I was having - that this was a physical health issue.
At that point I felt like all my concerns were discounted to my little health problem that makes me over-reactive. Ick.
I believe in honesty but not necessarily in exposing your vulnerabilities.
In places where there is any kind of pecking order or competition, I think you just have to put on the public face and not expose yourself.
Its hard though, when physically you really are vulnerable, and you could use some support and understanding.
-------------------- bejoy!
"Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Posts: 1918 | From Alive and Well! | Registered: Feb 2007
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troutscout
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 3121
posted
Here's my spin...I have used my story to encourage others to help themselves...they thrive on it....and then as time goes on....they do just exactly what you say here....
it affects your credibilty in some strange way.
They see it as a weakness rather than a show of strength and integrity.
As time goes on...you'll perfect your personal story...and then it will better position you to help others.
Trout
-------------------- Now is the time in your life to find the "tiger" within. Let the claws be bared, and Lyme BEWARE!!! www.iowalymedisease.com [/URL] Posts: 5262 | From North East Iowa | Registered: Sep 2002
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