Topic: May I just Collapse, Cry,Vent,...one to many things have happened
Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
BAd news from home...really bad...Moms in the hopsital again,and it's very serious.
Wegners disease took its toll.her vascualr system is s mess.
She had to go to hopsital lastnight...her legs are dying,veins arteries all collapsing,both legs.
Her Drs/surgeons are debating wether to amputate the legs. She isn't really stron enough for surgery...but w/o it we'll lose her.
AS some of you know,we've lost our main job,as some folk at the Church tho't our health issues were getting in the way [guess they wont hear Creators words thru a preacher whose rt. eye is blind now and his wife who has Lyme/and co.].
The funding was cut off from our counseling work last summer,even tho' Tx C worked w/ the youths thru October.
We are trying to find housing,and packing up.
TxC'hubby has a part tiem job, but thats all so far,lots of Job Apps out.
I'm still fighting Sinus infection and now UTI too [ seems to happen to me w/ IC issues].
ANd the other MEssage board I frequent,is being shut down after over nine years. The Ya Ya's
I found out what was making me ill and miserable since childhood from that Board that is being closed.
Because of Ms Rebecca Wells Lyme Disease etc. diagnosis,and her willingness to share,and have friends share...I found LymeNet.
Losing home and housing,TxC's sight in his rT.eye,The church,our counseling jobs, And Momma being so gravely ill...
Creator God,please we need a break...before I'm totally broken and no good to anyone or myself...Okay...my collapse wont help My folks,family,or TxC... So please send some streght and some good news please... a Miracle wouldn't hurt my feelings...if your willing Lord,Amen.
Jus' Silverwolf w/ tears and sniffles
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
| IP: Logged |
sixgoofykids
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 11141
posted
quote:Originally posted by Silverwolf: before I'm totally broken and no good to anyone or myself...
I'm sorry for all you're going through. Don't think for a minute that you would be no good to anyone or yourself ..... doing is not what's important .... being is.
God has a plan for all this, hang in there! .... 2 Corinthians --
quote:Three times I begged the Lord about this, that it might leave me,
but he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness." I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me.
Therefore, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints, for the sake of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong.
-------------------- sixgoofykids.blogspot.com Posts: 13449 | From Ohio | Registered: Feb 2007
| IP: Logged |
bettyg
Unregistered
posted
silverwolf,
wow, murphy's law just doesn't let up on you/family does it? stinks to high heaven...
It's like Mother Teresa said, "they say God doesn't give us anything we can't handle, but I wish he didn't trust me that much" or something to that effect; mind went totally blank when typing that.
Silver, hang in there; you/family are in my prayers!! something good has to come out of ALL of this, but it sure is hard to see in focus now!
IP: Logged |
feelfit
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 12770
posted
Silverwolf,
You and yours are in my prayers.
Feelfit Posts: 3975 | From usa | Registered: Aug 2007
| IP: Logged |
merrygirl
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 12041
posted
I am so sorry, may your prayers be answered.
shazdancer
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 1436
posted
I feel so bad for you, Wolfie -- I think it's about time for some good things to happen!
I can't believe Harper Collins is closing the Gumbo site down -- you just can't buy such good publicity, and the future of companies is in exploiting interactive sites like that one.
Please, you and TX hold each other close, and let us hold your baskets for awhile, okay?
And let me say about your parishioners, because you are too nice to say it out loud, that I think some so-called Christians just don't have the foggiest notion of what it's all about!
There, I said it, I feel better.... -- Shaz/DWL
Posts: 1558 | From the Berkshires | Registered: Jul 2001
| IP: Logged |
posted
do you want to join the "i don't want to do this anymore" club?
Memebers are allowed to scream, cry, vent, punch something (soft), etc.
The only rule, is that if you keep talking and don't give up! You can do it!
Posts: 368 | From freehold, nj | Registered: May 2007
| IP: Logged |
Geneal
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 10375
posted
It certainly does seem like the Lord gives some of us bigger crosses to bear sometimes.
It makes the difference between knowing and really knowing.
I am praying for some peace and healing in your life.
Whatever you have given out in life will come back to you.
It seems sometimes unfair that His time isn't the same as ours.
I am praying that it is real soon for you and your family.
Take a deep breath. Know you and your family are being prayed for.
Believe.
Hugs,
Geneal
Posts: 6250 | From Louisiana | Registered: Oct 2006
| IP: Logged |
Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Thanks <<<<< Lyme-r Family >>>>> For the hugs,and prayers.
Its been a rough ride for the last few years,and this latest set of issues, makes me feel shellshocked...think I got bucked off the horse and trampled.
And yup...please enlist me in the 'I'da'wanna'do'this'anymore'club. The Merry go round isn't any fun...it's dangerous and dizzying.
Been praying for mercy, grace, and strength in the midst of all this. I know our Creator is in control...but my brain is still in shock.
My adrenals are screaming,and my legs feel like lead weight.
As to the church situation, sadly a few folk have made problems for everyone. Because they don't really know how to let our Creator love thru them.
TxC' and I are learning a lesson in forgiveness...not easy. And I am hoping for the *day,when I see one of the folks that robbed us of our job.
And on that *day I can love them thru the Lord. I doubt we'll forget these things...but a friend said something like this once... I know that Creator has helped me to forgive when I remember a hard situation and it doesn't hurt anymore.
Meanwhile I wait and hope for my Momma that she wont suffer anymore,and perhaps that a miracle occurs.She has been so brave thru many hard physical battles...now she is weary.
I'll update as soon as we hear anything...
Now please y'all, don't close down on me Like Gumbo Ya Ya's is...I'm not happy with HarperCollins nor is the Ya Ya Community of over 10,000 folks.
Love from Shellshocked Silverwolf
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
| IP: Logged |
Carol in PA
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 5338
posted
quote: I'm still fighting Sinus infection and now UTI too [ seems to happen to me w/ IC issues].
I can't help you with the other issues, but something that may help the sinus infection is Serrapeptase.
quote:For those of you suffering from chronic sinusitis, we've finally found something that works, and works quite well.
In double blind studies and laboratory analyses, it's been discovered that serrapeptase just thins mucus and opens sinuses.
Its not going to work overnight. You will have to take the serrapeptase religiously for two weeks to a month.
In the double blind studies, they realized a 97.3% success rate in the serrapeptase group as compared to a 21.9% in the placebo group.
posted
Man, I'm really sorry to hear this, Wolf! I know how church folk can be. We have some stodgy people in our congregation too.
We just have to work around them!
I'm sorry in your case that you can't work around them. But I do imagine it's all going to work out for you.
It's just VERY painful in the meantime!
Hugs to you and hubby and I will pray for you too.....and your sweet Mother.
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96239 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
| IP: Logged |
Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Thanks to each one of y'all for the hugs,prayers and kindnesses <<<<< Lymer Family >>>>>![and sinus info too!].
What news I have came in early early am. this morning...so bleary teary eyed me went to bed for a few hours.
Five Fantastic Doctors [various specialist etc.] some hospital Drs and staff ,who are excellent caregivers.and a couple of surgeons are involved in my moms case.
As one of the Drs. said " -My Mom- has dodged a lot of bullets...she may not be able to dodge this one.".
ANd then on the other hand "...she is causing several medical textbooks to be rewritten.".
Mom is still far to weak for any surgery,they are doing everything they can think of to see if they can get her some little bit of strength.
With double amplification plus... they found the tiniest teensiest bit of blood flow in the left leg . The right leg ...total occlusion in arteries etc. She will lose part of the foot,maybe all...tissue is already dying.
She is on painkillers,and IV antibiotics etc., Drs are taking a wait and see attitude.
Keep the patient comfy/treat as best as is possible/wait and seee,and keep testing blood levels and so on.
Momma isn't eating very much,pain and meds impede that...but she is a fighter.
In the cold light of Day,as is said...I know that we could lose her,before they can do surgery etc.
She has beaten the odds several times, because of prayer to the greatest of All Healers!
From what we know of Wegners Disease, most patients die w/in about 1 to 3 years of diagnosis...Mom is an exception...She was diagnosed in early '86.
ANd she has an odd pairing of other diseases and health issues... its a balancing act really to keep all the meds going, w/o too many side-effects.
For us...job wise, we are waiting to hear on a number of Apps...and checking into housing.
We of course have to get a better paying job,and so on,to have enough monies for rent,utilities and general mundane neccesities.
Thanks Y'all for listening,for hugs and prayers...
Jus' the Silverwolf..still shook but holding on...
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
| IP: Logged |
posted
That guy that said, "God will neaver give you more than you can handle" Should be locked-a-way......! I feel like that every-day. I've always said, you dont need to look very-far from whAre you are, and see someone that would gladly trade places with ya. I cant imagin being worse off than the shoe's yr standin in. My best friend Ken, has always said "Worry about the things you can change, and not about the things you cant".....! Thats eazyer said than done too. "BUT", Dont give up hope. The care giver must ALWAYS Be Strong, for yr loved ones. If they see you gave up, than the snow-ball has started to roll, and everyone around you go's down with you. It is very helpfull to go whAre nobody can see you fall apart, cry, screem, get a hammer, and a fist full of nails, and a 2x4, and pound the hell out of it. You must vent, or you will give up, Trust me. Fell apart twice, and the thired time wont be a charm........! Just dont give up. Thank God we have Lyme Net. Tex
Posts: 39 | From Branson Mo. | Registered: May 2007
| IP: Logged |
Silverwolf
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 9196
posted
Thank you for teh kind words <<<<< Tex'and each responder >>>>>
Wish we had better news,mom is still about the same. Hopefully we'll have more info again tommorrow.
If there is still no change,we leave early Friday morning fot SLC again,For TxCoords' eye exam w/ his surgeons. Hopefully this time they wont be poking around in the eye again.
It is so painful w/ the needles... sounds like torture...but they have to keep certain areas open and flowing so the eye drains properly.[His eye doesn't numb easily].
This last couple weeks his eye pressure has seemed better,w/o the pain so hopefully it is getting better. we ahve the eye clinic here check if he gets the least lingering headache.
We've both had soem weather/stress headaches w/ the family issues and work/work loss. And There've been fairly high winds here.
But TxC's headaches haven't lasted very long [when the eye worsened,it was weeks of blinding headache..no pun intended].
If this is some poignant test... I wish we could move onto better times...obviously we've flunked...or maybe not?!!
Hmm wasn't it David in one of the Biblical Psalms... that was lamenting... If I go down into the pit and die...how can I serve you Lord?
Me.I don' know... I know I am praying for better news,and hoping for better days.
If I could I would get an old board and some nails and hammer away,as Tex suggested...but my shoulder is being stupid... and the rotator cup/cuff wahtever it is pains me from the least little thing.
I'e been able to vent to a dear friend or two,and it is helping a little. I still find myself crying for no good reason,and every reason too.
Will update as soon as we have anymore news.
Love Wolfn'
-------------------- 2006,May-August2006 Dx w/ Lyme/Bartonella/White Matter Lesion Disease on Brain. [ Clinical Dx w/ two positives and several IND's on the tests from Igenex ], Prior Dx of CFIDS/CEBV 1992, and FMS '93-'94 Diabetes*2 Dx 10/'08 Posts: 3581 | From SE Idaho | Registered: May 2006
| IP: Logged |
bettyg
Unregistered
posted
wolfin, VENT ANYTIME HERE! thanks for your update!
IP: Logged |
posted
Maby this will help a bit. Back when the kids were in 6-8th grade and something went realy wrong with the family, we would get a bucket of ice cream. Got out 4 spoons, set er on the coffee table, and Pig'ed Out".....! Some how just eating way to much ice cream, took some of the pain away, and made you forget your troubles for a little wile. No, they were'nt gone, but a belly full of "Ice Cream", seemed to help push them a little farther back. When You Cant Eat, anymore more ice cream, you gotta feel a little bit better. Cuz we did something "We Shoulde'nt"......! Posts: 39 | From Branson Mo. | Registered: May 2007
| IP: Logged |
The Lyme Disease Network is a non-profit organization funded by individual donations. If you would like to support the Network and the LymeNet system of Web services, please send your donations to:
The
Lyme Disease Network of New Jersey 907 Pebble Creek Court,
Pennington,
NJ08534USA http://www.lymenet.org/
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
![[group hug]](graemlins/grouphug.gif)
![[kiss]](graemlins/kissing.gif)
![[Mad]](mad.gif)
![[cussing]](graemlins/cussing.gif)
![[rant]](graemlins/rant.gif)
![[confused]](graemlins/confused.gif)
![[dizzy]](graemlins/dizzy.gif)
![[toilet]](graemlins/toilet.gif)
That guy that said, "God will neaver give you more than you can handle" Should be locked-a-way......! I feel like that every-day. I've always said, you dont need to look very-far from whAre you are, and see someone that would gladly trade places with ya. I cant imagin being worse off than the shoe's yr standin in. My best friend Ken, has always said "Worry about the things you can change, and not about the things you cant".....! Thats eazyer said than done too. "BUT", Dont give up hope. The care giver must ALWAYS Be Strong, for yr loved ones. If they see you gave up, than the snow-ball has started to roll, and everyone around you go's down with you. It is very helpfull to go whAre nobody can see you fall apart, cry, screem, get a hammer, and a fist full of nails, and a 2x4, and pound the hell out of it. You must vent, or you will give up, Trust me. Fell apart twice, and the thired time wont be a charm........! Just dont give up. Thank God we have Lyme Net. Tex
![[bonk]](graemlins/bonk.gif)
![[bow]](graemlins/bow.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
Printer-friendly view of this topic