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» LymeNet Flash » Questions and Discussion » General Support » How to cut someone loose

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Author Topic: How to cut someone loose
Bitrex
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A long story short - over the past year or so I'd developed a relationship (on the internet, sigh) with a great girl who was interested for a time in making a connection with me in real life. Unfortunately, my illness didn't cooperate, and nobody can expect someone to wait forever. We now have been having less and less contact, and when we do talk she spends more and more time wanting to discuss other great guys she has met.

I feel that unfortunately, for my own sanity, I need to cut this relationship off before it becomes too painful. I just wish I knew the correct words to say to make it easiest on both of us.

Posts: 32 | From Massachusetts | Registered: Sep 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mtree
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Hi Bitrex,

Can't you say to her what you just said to us...
nothing wrong with how you feel and why you feel it... [spinning smile]

if she cares about you she will understand..

maybe if she knew all of this things would/could be different with you both...maybe in a good way??


[Smile] mtree

--------------------
worrying about tomorrow takes its strength away from today

Posts: 970 | From Point PLeasant , NJ | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hoosiers51
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Does she know you never met up because of your Lyme? It might be good to make it clear to her, if you still care about her, that you really DO want to meet up eventually, but tell her the reason.

Maybe she just feels like you were blowing her off, or like you are using Lyme as an excuse. Maybe she just feels rejected and that's why she decided to move on.

So my point is maybe make the situation clear, and say something like, "i would still really like to continue the relationship"

That is, if that is what you want!

If you DO want to just break it off...couldn't you just not reply next time she emails you? Or do you guys talk on the phone a lot? Because then maybe you could just say something like, "hey, it was really nice getting to know you and I appreciate the time we spent talking, but I think I need to move on so I can feel a clean break. It is probably just best for me to not talk to you for awhile (meaning, forever), just so that I can move on with things. Is that okay?" (I'm assuming she'll say yes. If she says no, just say, "well, this is really what I need to do for ME.") And leave it at that

Sorry if that sounds really lame, but it is the best I can come up with, so hopefully it gives you a few ideas.

Good luck either way!

Posts: 4590 | From Midwest | Registered: Jun 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
merrygirl
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It kinda sounds like she is trying to cut the relationship off already by mentioning other "great guys". just my take.

good luck

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Bitrex
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Thanks for the advice everyone. The hardest part of this illness sometimes is the impossible choices it forces one to make.
Posts: 32 | From Massachusetts | Registered: Sep 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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