posted
help, i have a court case coming up i need to testify in.
are there ways to have the court make special accomodations so i can understand and reply correctly during any questioning?
I have slurred speech, word finding problems, understanding what the question means, short term memory problems(unsure what the last question asked was or cant remember if i already answered it) reasoning and communicating impairments
i am going back to court for numerous contempts against my ex husband because he ignores court orders due to my inability to fight him on any of it because of my illnesses.
i cannot afford a lawyer and the judge gets confused and irritated because i do not understand her questions. my exhusband laughs and tells me he can do what he wants because the judge thinks i am crazy.
since our trial i was approved for disability because of my illness. the retroactive benefits due my children was sent to him to manage but he spent the entire $26,000 on himself and his wife and my children got $100 for clothes and a laptop
i have to pursue this to protect my kids. he continues to spend their monthly benefit and my kids get nothing. he was granted physical custody but he didnt really want them he just wanted the money so the custody actually stayed with me.
therefore i raise my kids on disability income for myself,recieve no child support and stress about providing the basic needs of my children. i do not qualify for food stamps because the exhusband applied for and recieved them immediately upon getting custody.
all i can do is be grateful he didnt really keep them from me to be further neglected
if anyone can help, please reply to what i can do to get a fair chance to present my case
i have a wonderful and supportive boyfriend(helping me with this and he is feeling quite important) but he cannot advise me on something he cannot understand either and the stress this has all caused is making my symptoms worse every day.
he has done this before and the stress led to me needing major abdominal surgery to repair my bleeding ulcers. whats left of my stomach has new sores and i am vomiting blood
i need this resolved soon or i feel my kids will lose me to all this. i have many medical providers who are completely on my side but their opinion will never be heard if i cannot present it.
posted
i'm so sorry to read that your exhusband spent YOUR back pay SSDI insurance benefits on himself/new wife! what a jerk.
please go to top of SUPPORT and click on minoucat's DISABILITY post. go to the LAST PAGE, and read what i just typed in there tonight.
perhaps you could get some advise there.
we DO have lawyer members also. they do read here in support. so i hope they contact you by PRIVATE MESAGE to tell you some basics you need to know ok!
what a crappy deal!
i'd call courthouse ahead of time and tell them specifically what YOU NEED... sorry, but i have no idea what that would be.
HOPEFULLY OTHERS WILL JOIN IN TOMORROW to give you great ideas ok.
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posted
thank you for the resources on this site. im sure i can get some helpful information as im sure there is someone out there who have had similar difficulties in court.
i try not to think of what a jerk the ex husband is it just makes me feel worse to believe people can do such horrible things for financial gain. i have been able to gain acceptance in the fact he will never change and i have NO CONTROLL if he does or not.
i have come a long way in focusing on what i can change in myself and leaving the other stuff in Gods hands.
im told often how things happen for a reason and the obstacles i overcome can be used to increase my confidence i will beat all i face.
thank you so much for all the support
Posts: 36 | From woburn,ma | Registered: Nov 2007
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if my medical records contradict the judges opinion may this be used as reason to grant accomodations as well?
i have my pcp,psychologist,pain clinic,physical therapist,occupational therapist, and various other doctors willing to submit a letter to the court about my need for these services.
does anyone actually know if i need to address this with the judge that thinks im nuts? or is there another department that could determine this and put into place before the judge lays eyes on me again?
she does not understand my issues because i was so impaired at the time i couldnt even understand i needed them, they were available and my attorney at the time couldnt understand what i was trying to relay either.
i was so damaged and emotionally consumed i talked in circles. what judge would put custody with a mother who behaved that way in her courtroom? i understand its not her fault and i have high regard for the justice system as i know the intention is to insure the needs of my children are met.
sadly the opposite is true. my ex has full immunity to financially provide for his kids and in fact is stealing from them.
my retroactive disability check went straight to an attorney for a retainer but i hope to keep cost down so i dont run out of money before trial(as it did before leaving me on my own)
ugh, i have to say i am so grateful this site is here and no matter what happens i feel i am not alone. we all struggle and somehow we make it through another day.
and we must move on in memory of those who didnt. i want to live again and enjoy my life. God bless.
Posts: 36 | From woburn,ma | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
Oh dear. I really hope you win this court case!
As for the judge- I have no legal knowledge, but could you not protest and ask for a different judge on the grounds that this one is prejudiced against you?
Posts: 503 | From Alberta, Canada | Registered: Jun 2009
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posted
i inquired about a new judge but there are only 3 and i hear she is fair i just need the legal grounds she hear what i say.
i am just requesting they accomodate my disability so i can explain then present the documents to back it up.
perhaps the opportunity to be deposed and questioned in a more casual setting or a liason to explain the questions and help communicate my answer.
i would think the law that requires such accomodations for physical disabilities(wheelchair ramps, parking, safety rails etc) they provide language interpreters so why arent there provisions for people with cognative impairments or even emotional disabilities (mental health issues)
i do believe i would be competent at trial but i have what i would believe to be referred to as a diminished capacity. i feel i would do very well if given an equal playing field.
i wish they would allow my boyfriend with this as look what he has been able to do writing this post for me while i just fire rapid ideas at him using big words.
its hard to accept the thinking issues and im doing all i can to keep a good attitude about my intellect. I have a lot to say, I just need help saying it in person.
i cant tell you how many hearings i had while i was not represented by counsel where i couldnt speak,the hearing was over and i was standing there in shock with a folder full of proof (doctors notes,school records, etc in support i was a competent and nurturing mother.
unfortunately, I "forgot" to give her the documents.
Posts: 36 | From woburn,ma | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
I sent you a PM.
Posts: 366 | From MA | Registered: Apr 2006
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Ocean
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 3496
posted
I am not a lawyer and don't know much about the law, but this is just BS!!! I am SO sorry for all that you have been through. I know how much stress impacts Lyme Disease.
I will pray for you and I hope that the judge can see what is really happening to you because of your ex.
posted
my family does all they can to support me but the added stress makes it even more difficult to concentrate on the important tasks at hand to prepare for all this. Is there any support groups around the Woburn MA area to gain support and "keep my head together" ?
We all know how the appearance of looking well hinders our getting extra support needed. I believe all the added drama gets in the way of relationships with people who cant possibly understand the difficulties to someone like me. I have such a hard time understanding and expressing things correctly.
I know what needs to be done i just have no clue how to do it. Any suggestions?
Posts: 36 | From woburn,ma | Registered: Nov 2007
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shazdancer
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 1436
posted
You might want to try calling the department of health and human services in your area. Explain your situation and see what they can do to assist you.
If they can't help, try contacting your local women's shelter or National Organization of Women affiliate. They usually know who will do pro bono work in difficult divorce cases where the spouse is in financial need.
Take care, Shaz
Posts: 1558 | From the Berkshires | Registered: Jul 2001
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