Ann-OH
Frequent Contributor (5K+ posts)
Member # 2020
posted
I have sent along columns by Leslie several times. This 16th birthday tribute to her daughter, after all they have been through with Lyme disease, turns out to be a tribute to the love and understanding she shares with her mom, along with some great observations and some tips on growing up with teens.
Thanks to one of my heroes,
Ann-OH
Birthday Wishes for Smidge
By Leslie Pearce Keating [ for the Wooster Daily Record]
Most of the time, she calls me Midge. Not Mom, not Mama. Just Midge. Truth is, I kind of like the moniker. She says she invented the nickname because I am now the shortest member of the family. At 5'8'', I find that funny. But it's true. She is nearly 5'9''. Anyway, she calls me Midge.
As for my girl, I call her a variety of pet names, most often Smidge, which I guess means she is a little bit of Midge. A smidgen. Her friends sometimes look at us like we're crazy when we have an exchange that goes something like this:
``Hi, Midge, how was your day?''
``It was just great, Smidge. How was yours?''
We hug. We walk arm-in-arm. A lot of women I know would kill for that kind of relationship with their teenaged daughter. I know I'm darned lucky.
But the truth is, my Smidge and I are great friends because we've walked through fire together. Not every mom and daughter can say that. We've fought the good fight, dealt with a lot more health problems than most eighty-year-olds have handled in a lifetime. As a result, we talk straight. Most parents say they'd do anything for their kids. My daughter knows I've already tried.
I admit that I haven't done everything right where my kids are concerned, but this having teenagers thing isn't nearly as complicated as many parents told me it would be. I had twelve years of on-the-job training as a high school teacher. Maybe that helped. I guess I learned a few things along the way.
Like, always talk. But most of the time, listen. Always pray together. Encourage the truth, even if it isn't pretty. Include your kids' friends. Don't judge dumb things like hairstyles and clothing choices. Minimize the criticism. And always hug.
I still pull my six- foot son onto my lap occasionally, even if he does fight to get away. At times, I cuddle my daughter like when she was small. They don't struggle nearly as much as I'd imagined they would.
Today my Smidge will be blowing out 16 candles on her birthday cake. I can't help recalling the first time I saw her in the nursery Isollete, a tiny five-pound newborn, with big green eyes as wide as the sky. She recognized my voice that day. I recognized her eyes. They were the same green color as her dad's.
Over the years, I taught her to sing and whistle and be a ham. She baked with me, and starred in my plays. She danced in a recital when she was small, stealing the stage from the other little girls. All the other moms felt the same way about their little girls. Too bad they were wrong.
When she sits at the table, she always blesses herself before she eats, even when the rest of us forget. She never misses the chance to coo over a baby, even a stranger's. She knows the intricacies of every fashion designer who ever walked the earth, knows every fashion model by name, and can apply makeup better than a trained artist. She taught herself those skills.
And I tell her, every chance I get, that if I were to pick the daughter of my choice, the girl beyond my dreams, the best person I've ever known, I would always pick her.
Now I just pray the good Lord will let all her dreams come true. Say that little prayer for her, too, won't you? Just one little prayer for my precious daughter, the girl I call Smidge.
linky123
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 19974
posted
Brought tears to my eyes. Yes, I will say a prayer and Happy Birthday to Smidge!
-------------------- 'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28 Posts: 2607 | From Hooterville | Registered: Apr 2009
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Happy Sweet 16 to smidge. She sounds like one wonderful girl.
I'll keep her in my prayers along with her mom midge who is one awesome mom.
-------------------- You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'
---Eleanor Roosevelt Posts: 748 | From somewhere | Registered: May 2010
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My sweet girl turned sixteen last week. She and I, too, walked through fire together. She is my favorite person in the world - funny, sweet, compassionate - just the best.
After three years of horrible illness, miraculously, she is almost well - going to community college, babysitting, shopping, talking about colleges (good lord, give her the sense to pick one where there aren't many ticks!)
The silver lining in the whole horrible dark cloud of lyme is all the wonderful hours we spent together - reading aloud (all 7 Harry Potter books read three times through!), watching Gilmore Girls, playing with foster kittens, singing aloud, training our dog to be her loyal service dog. (Poor dog is out of a job these days!)
"That which does not kill us makes us stronger"
-------------------- "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain." Anonymous Posts: 450 | From California | Registered: Feb 2008
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