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» LymeNet Flash » Questions and Discussion » General Support » Doesn't it suck to have a messy home?

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Author Topic: Doesn't it suck to have a messy home?
James1979
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I think it adds an incredible amount of stress. It's almost like having another coinfection!

I gotta get on top of this stuff.

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penguingirl
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I hate clutter! But sometimes I am just too sick to clean up..

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merrygirl
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I can deal with messy. I cant deal with dirty. I am so discouraged by my house. I agree with you.
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penguingirl
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I don't know what I will do when/if I have kids in the future. I know it is practically impossible to keep a clutter-free house then!

Yeah for me - cleanliness is first too. I always focus on the kitchen and bathroom. The living room/bedroom have lower priority.

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penguingirl
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I get very stressed out when I see too much dust in my home. It really bugs me. But I can't clean my window blinds in the kitchen (too hard to do now plus picc line) so that will have to wait..

I know I am OCD about cleaning. Always have been!

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James1979
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Alice- yeah, it's the little stuff that gets me the most. I haven't taken care of my aquarium in AGES! I keep putting it off. I don't even know if the little fishies are still alive in there! [shake]

The sad thing is that I've been feeling pretty good for a couple of months now. BUT it takes so much darn time to take care of my health. With all of the supplements, and the timing, and the special diet (which also means you have to cook everything yourself), the exercising, the coffee enemas and castor oil packs (when necessary)... it all adds up.

My days seem to fly by in an instant, and it seems like I spend the majority of the day taking care of my health. It feels like a big waste.

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sbh93
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Check out flylady.net. Sure, there's days and weeks where I can't do anything, but many of the simple strategies here help prevent feeling overwhelmed by my house. And when it is overwhelming, I tell myself I have to deal with it as I do one task per day or one room per day.

It's hard when everything stresses you out but, as my mother told me a few weeks ago (and this is harsh, so if you're sensitive or feeling really low stop reading), "the house and mess will still be there when you're dead and gone."

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It took 20 years to find out I'm not crazy.
New bite in 2010 pushed my body over the edge. Positive for lyme, babs, bart, and myco.
I am not a doctor and happily offer only my own opinions.

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Lymetoo
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quote:
Originally posted by merrygirl:
I can deal with messy. I cant deal with dirty. I am so discouraged by my house. I agree with you.

-
Amen.. even when I was really sick, I kept my place reasonably clean. Now with my back and neck issues, I can't even make my bed.

I need a maid really badly. Can't afford it!!! I've spoiled my husband, so he isn't a lot of help until I whine and complain!! [Razz]

I think it REALLY bugs me because I now have all the time in the world to clean and can't do it. I WANT to clean!!! [rant]

--------------------
--Lymetutu--
Opinions, not medical advice!

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momindeep
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I wish I could come clean for each and everyone of you...that's what I do...I'm a maid and an organizer for people...it's my job.
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Mo
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sorry to hear that lymetoo.
i would guess you like tidy.
it'll pass and you do have to take care of you.

which leads me to james' quote:
"it seems like I spend the majority of the day taking care of my health. It feels like a big waste."

that's no waste!!

take the cleaning back in small steps, it can easily seem more overwhelming than it is.
or give yourself permission to wait and that's fine too.

mo

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nonna05
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Not only in bed most of the time. So no cleaning, or barely. Thought husband was keeping up basics when I was so sick I just fought to go to bathroom. He's not working ,so kinda thought it was OK.. NOT,,, "his stuff is covered" and I have piles of mail and boxes to go through.. It really stresses me cause so much not like me to have obvious crap sitting around.


But The dust/ cleaners etc. really set me off . Tight chest head fog. Then the feeling of lay down or else comes on. It sucks when you can do so little, Except fight illness this [bonk] [Mad] [confused]


What's weird, though is on the very few days, , when I come back to life a bit, I naturally start doing a few of these things without really thinking about it.

But this last round of way down ,is not letting up. Even though I'm getting LLMD treatment... I'm wondering if I picked up a bit of this Listeria stuff.

Did buy cantaloupe at that time. I was only one who ate a few bits. I got sick on top of sick a few days later . And wondering if this might have something to do with me having such a harder time right now...

I'm on meds ,so maybe that keeped (spelling??) me out of hospital or worse. I know it seems unlikely. but timing and symptoms really line up... It's definitely going over doctors head, no return call.

So this post should be split and posted elsewhere. Or I just needed to vent. [loco] [lol] [shake] [dizzy] [hi]

Blessing's to you all. Nonna

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linky123
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I hear ya! I have two teenagers perfectly able to do something, but I have to threaten or bribe.
The only way they will do anything willingly is when I'm flat on my back. Surgery etc.

My daughter, have to give her credit, likes to cook and does most of the work when I can't.

I have MCS too, but found a cleaner I can tolerate - Bar Keepers Friend - it has a smell (but not so strong) and I have to cover my nose and mouth, but it works great in the bathroom,, showers, tubs, sinks etc. Hard on the skin though; I always wear gloves.

The clutter drives me crazy too. Kinda gives me a rash!

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'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28

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James1979
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Nonna - Did you speak a different language before you learned English? Your writings sound like you have an accent. I'm just curious.
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mom2kids
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This something I am still working on, dealing with a messy house. It's not dirty and it doesn't seem to bother anybody but me, so it can't be that bad, I hope.

My daughter's friend said to me one time "I love coming to your house, it's always such a mess"! All the kids love to come to our house, on the weekends I call it a frat house, except there are gatorade bottles laying around instead of beer bottles.

I think they like it because hubby and I aren't uptight and the kids can just hang and relax here.

I have been trying to purge the house to have a giant yard sale. We just have too much crap and it drives me nuts, plus we could use some extra money. I used to purge closets and everything 2-3 times a year and get a dunmpster once a year.

It has been 6 years now since we have done this. I keep hoping Neicy Nash will knock on my door, but my house isn't that bad yet.

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Down on her knees, she wept on the floor.
This hopeless life, she wanted no more.
Dead in the mind and cold to the bone,
She opened her eyes and saw she was alone. ~Seether

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lou
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Clutter does not bother me. One small blessing.
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JeniferM
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Cleaning is usually the last thing I have any energy to do. I can't stand the clutter... it overwhelms my senses when there's too many things to focus on.

I have one room I spend a large majority of my time in (when I'm not at work) and I attempt to keep the clutter down in there, but the rest of the house is a disaster. I'm embarrassed to have anyone come in. I'm lucky if I can actually clean a bathroom much less get to the point of making the bed.

There's dust everywhere, and I'm allergic to dust, but my arms are too tired to do it. sigh. I'm keeping hope that one day the fatigue will go away and I'll have a respectable home again. I was never a clean freak to begin with, but this is terrible.

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IgM: [18++,31+++,34++,41++,83-93+] [39 IND]
IgG: [41 IND]
Positive according to IGeneX. Negative according to CDC. Negative for co-infections.
Currently treating for Lyme, Bartonella, Babesia

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payne
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wow i have the hebbie geebbies if i see one speck on the floor or if the dishes aren't done ASAP...
I guess I fell behind on once and live in fear of doing it again...
one of my co infections is
overkleaninhousetitis
it makes everyone around me unconfortable..
I do feel more confort with alittle mess...

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TULAREMIA/rabbit fever ?

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Lymetoo
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momindeep... WI is not REAL FAR from Missouri!!..?? [Big Grin] C'mon down!!

mom2kids.. yep, I've been needing to have a garage sale for a year now. It's just SO MUCH WORK... and now I absolutely can't do it. THANKFULLY, I cleaned out my closet (some) in late winter and I also got rid of some things at our church's garage sale for Joplin.

It really bothers me to have too many things around. Things we don't need. And I hate to throw things out. I may call a service we have here where they will come and do it for you. (They get paid from the sale of what you give them.) But truthfully, I want to SELL it myself! [bonk]

I also hate clutter, but I do seem to have plenty of it. And like someone said, my house bothers ME, and not many others!!

--------------------
--Lymetutu--
Opinions, not medical advice!

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robbiem
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Hi James

I swear by my kitchen timer b/c it gets me to at least do something even at my worst.

Sometimes it's only 5 minutes in whatever room is a priority. (The kitchen almost always wins out.)

Sounds crazy, I know but no matter what condition I am in--If I utilize the timer, I get far more done than if I don't.

Working 10 mins spread out over the course of the day when I am home @ 4 different times (after breakfast, Lunch, afternoon, evening) I still end up then having accomplished 40 mins worth of house work vs. not doing anything whatsoever.

Although the house may not be sparkling afterwards, I am able to at least keep some sembalance of order and clean counters, neaten up and get a few loads of laundry done, too.

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sutherngrl
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When I was at my sickest, I just couldn't do it. Now that I am better, I have no motivation(depression). But it really does bug me to death. I think I need to try the kitchen timer trick.
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James1979
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robbiem - I love your timer idea! Did you think that up yourself, or did you read about it from a book?

I have to try that sometime! Thanks.

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Dogsandcats
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Merrygirl...don't you have a new baby? Oh my, just getting thru the day would be a major accomplishment

Flylady-I have looked at it..it does help if you get the basic concept. Careful if you sign up for emails....overload.
I learned to wipe out the kitchen sink when done, somehow that somedays is a yahoo day for me.

We have stairs..my rulenis never go up or down without something that goes there.

My youngest just moved out...waaaaaaaaa
But it did eliminate some of the mess...

On days where I feel I can, I do a little something to clean. Paying bills is my YUCKY..last month I crisscrossed paying the gas and electric.

My heart goes out to you who have children. I could not have made it. But I guess we make it thru what we have to. God always provides....maybe just not in the way we think we need it!

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God will prepare everything for our perfect happiness in heaven, and if it takes my dog being there, I believe he'll be there.

Billy Graham

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robbiem
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Are you kidding me, James? I can't remember my own phone number, let alone where I came up with that one.

Seriously, I think I tried it on a whim, and it worked so well I stuck with it.

But I have read the suggestion elsewhere since then.

sutherngrl, it works like a charm -- part of my lack of initiative has always been b/c of low level depression. For me, the timer quite simply is the answer, and has turned many a day around for me mood wise once I put it to good use. Give it a try!

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michiganfun
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I call it "lived in". I know when I walk into a house where there are jackets laying on the couch, a sock in the dog's mouth, a dirty cup on the kitchen table, etc. that I am HOME. A place where I can be me, in any mood or physical condition, and still loved. "Lived in" for me is life saving. Though I would LOVE a maid too!
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merrygirl
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yup new baby. but shes really good and pretty easy. its the older kids that drive me nuts lol
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lpkayak
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couldnt read all but james this has been a major problem for me-some is lyme some is head injury related

at different times i have done different things---hired help when i had to work or was post op...but for me it is sooooo embarrassing...dont want to let anyone in...and dangerous...i lose credit cards and ids constantly and have close calls falling...

i feel so good when everything is in its place but it doesnt happen often

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Lyme? Its complicated. Educate yourself.

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randibear
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i have offered to help lyme patients around here but they have declined.

i'd be there in a heartbeat if i could.

somebody told me that they would be embarassed at how bad their house is and another told me "oh my husband won't let anyone in the house, he's so particular".....ummm ok....

so i quit offering. heck, i wasn't asking for money or food or anything, just wanted to help...

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do not look back when the only course is forward

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penguingirl
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Wow Randi - that was so nice of you to offer!

I would do the same as well when I am more healthy - but I guess I can understand how some people might react that way.

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randibear
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well I'm dumber than a stump sometimes!!! They were complaining and just went on and on about their husbands and kids didn't like the house, they couldn't cook etc and everyone said oh poor you must be terrible but noone offered to help so I did. Then they looked At me lime I was crazy and came up with all these excuses. One even told mesh was too busy...ummm if you have Lyme and are sick why are you too busy? Sorry but you have to hit me with a
Two by four sometimes. I honestly didn't understand. To me that's what friends do, help each other....

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do not look back when the only course is forward

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Dogsandcats
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Randibear
I think some people just like to complain
Others may feel embarrassed that their house had been let go

I offered years ago to help a friend who had back problems
I as leaned over the toilet bowl, she leaned in with me telling me how to clean...I figured if she was that close, she could do it herself as she helped me with everything I did.

People are strange as The Doors said..

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God will prepare everything for our perfect happiness in heaven, and if it takes my dog being there, I believe he'll be there.

Billy Graham

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JeniferM
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My significant other offers to help with more things, but there are times where I get so tired of being a burden that I don't want people to do even more things for me. Even though I can't do them, I so desperately want to do them myself.

Sometimes my "Minnesota Nice" kicks in and I have to decline at least 2 times before finally saying "okay":

"You want more sweet potatoes?"
"No, I couldn't possibly eat any more."
"Are you sure? There are a lot left?"
"I really shouldn't..."
"If you don't eat them they'll just go to waste."
"Oh, okay"
- hahahaha!

Another possibility for people declining: my mother has a problem with people touching her stuff. She had a stroke last year and my Dad and I had to go through the house and make sure paths were clear enough for her to get through without tripping on things. She was furious with us for moving her things, even though there was no way should could do it herself.

--------------------
IgM: [18++,31+++,34++,41++,83-93+] [39 IND]
IgG: [41 IND]
Positive according to IGeneX. Negative according to CDC. Negative for co-infections.
Currently treating for Lyme, Bartonella, Babesia

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linky123
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Tutu,

I think you should whine and complain!

--------------------
'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28

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James1979
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Did someone say "wine"? [Eek!]
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Harmony
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quote:
Originally posted by James1979:
I think it adds an incredible amount of stress. It's almost like having another coinfection!

I gotta get on top of this stuff.

...another co-infection, [lol] that is pretty funny.

yeah, first I thought you're right, since I do feel loads better when I clear a tiny little spot somewhere - but then, there are three thoughts:

#1 - I looaave my STUFF, so it makes me feel good to have it around when I lie in bed staring up at stuff

#2 - it gives me a chance to "clear something" in less than an hour and feel great about that

#3 - I am so glad I have the proverbial 'pot to p^*# in and a window to throw it out of' - "Slimy mudhole? My home this is!" (extra points if you know who said that) [Wink]

so this ain't so bad, eh?

--------------------
Persistence, persistence, persistence!!!
"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence...
Persistence and determination are omnipotent."
attributed to Calvin Coolidge

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James1979
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Harmony - Re: your #1: Why in the world are you "staring up at stuff" when you lie in bed? Is your pile of junk so high that you have to look up to see it? [Big Grin] [lol]

Re: #3: I have no idea, and I don't want to google it because that would be cheating. [Smile]

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Kudzuslipper
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I hear you James... Sometimes I think it would be easier to move than to clean. A nice penthouse with a cement terrace with fake grass for the dogs LoL.

I had a really clean house before we got dogs... It really bothers me... Their little paws and tails bring in so much dirt. And now I can't really keep up... But then their little wiggle butts when I get home from a bad day make me smile. But since I got my speudo dx... In addittion to seeing them like cute little dirt balls... I see them as tick carriers...but they are our kids... What are we gonna do? And my DH is great. With both the dogs and the house... But somehow I still wish the house were "cleaner.".


I hear you James... Sometimes I think it would be easier to move than to clean.

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Lymetoo
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quote:
Originally posted by linky123:
Tutu,

I think you should whine and complain!

-
I hate to!! [Cool]

--------------------
--Lymetutu--
Opinions, not medical advice!

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James1979
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quote:
Originally posted by Kudzuslipper:
I hear you James... Sometimes I think it would be easier to move than to clean. A nice penthouse with a cement terrace with fake grass for the dogs LoL.

I had a really clean house before we got dogs... It really bothers me... Their little paws and tails bring in so much dirt. And now I can't really keep up... But then their little wiggle butts when I get home from a bad day make me smile. But since I got my speudo dx... In addittion to seeing them like cute little dirt balls... I see them as tick carriers...but they are our kids... What are we gonna do? And my DH is great. With both the dogs and the house... But somehow I still wish the house were "cleaner.".


I hear you James... Sometimes I think it would be easier to move than to clean.

Did someone say "penthouse"? [lol]
Okay that was bad. It's late now, so that's why I'm allowed to make bad jokes. [Wink]

Kudzu - do you put Frontline or similar products on your dogs? Sometimes it really helps to keep the ticks down.

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Kudzuslipper
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James, yup... we do frontline religiously even before I knew I had lyme. and heartworm meds too. We used to spray the yard with Garlic (repels skeeters and ticks) But, now I have the them poisoned!

the problem with Frontline is it does not repel the ticks...just keeps them from biting (or staying attached long enough to infect) the dog!..so the ticks just take a ride into the house. The day after I found out i had lyme, we found a dog tick in our bed! I HATE TICKS!!!!! But I love my boys!

Alas, won't have to worry about it much longer as there will be 3 feet of snow and temps below freezing... I may hate winter as much as I hate ticks!!!

sorry to hijack your thread [Frown]

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mom2kids
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Randibear, don't take it personally, I know so many people (or used to anyways) that have a cleaning person and they run around to "tidy up" before they come. It's just human nature, IMO, that most people don't want others to know/see their dirty little secrets, literally.

--------------------
Down on her knees, she wept on the floor.
This hopeless life, she wanted no more.
Dead in the mind and cold to the bone,
She opened her eyes and saw she was alone. ~Seether

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Kudzuslipper
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Alice, just be sure to watch your dog for a reaction when you try it. I have heard they can get neurological sypmtoms. We see the dog ticks too...but I am thinking perhaps they are the only ones we can see.
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Harmony
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quote:
Originally posted by James1979:
Harmony - Re: your #1: Why in the world are you "staring up at stuff" when you lie in bed? Is your pile of junk so high that you have to look up to see it? [Big Grin] [lol]

*** You bet!!!***

quote:
Originally posted by James1979:
Re: #3: I have no idea, and I don't want to google it because that would be cheating. [Smile]

*** Yoda in Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back, when Luke arrives to be trained and calls the planet a slimy mud hole - the grammar should have given that away

--------------------
Persistence, persistence, persistence!!!
"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence...
Persistence and determination are omnipotent."
attributed to Calvin Coolidge

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scorpiogirl
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quote:
Originally posted by Lymetoo:
quote:
Originally posted by merrygirl:
I can deal with messy. I cant deal with dirty. I am so discouraged by my house. I agree with you.

-
Amen.. even when I was really sick, I kept my place reasonably clean. Now with my back and neck issues, I can't even make my bed.

I need a maid really badly. Can't afford it!!! I've spoiled my husband, so he isn't a lot of help until I whine and complain!! [Razz]

I think it REALLY bugs me because I now have all the time in the world to clean and can't do it. I WANT to clean!!! [rant]

LOL how true!! Not only that but I am allergic to dust mites!! So I can't even be in the house when my house cleaner comes!!

The irony of it all is I actually LIKE cleaning!! Before I learned I was allergic to dust mites I would spend my time talking to my friends on the phone while I do my housework! Now I will just make the bed and do the laundry and clear the dishes... but the dusting, sweeping, vacuuming, mopping and bathrooms are no longer my duties.

And I have to evacuate when she is cleaning. [Frown]

--------------------
 -

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Dogsandcats
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i decided to clean up a bit

i did a fantastic job

i cleaned and moved all the piles to another place.

my son was here this weekend from college. he was so sweet, he left laundry and said he would pick it up next weekend. He also bought some pants and asked if "while I am out" if I would drop them off to be hemmed....no worries he said, I don't need them til next weekend.....

precious.....
but i would do it every week in a heartbeat - unless i was too sick. he was the one that drove me around and took care of me when i was at my worst...so, i guess i can't complain - but i just did.

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God will prepare everything for our perfect happiness in heaven, and if it takes my dog being there, I believe he'll be there.

Billy Graham

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Robin123
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My idea of initial cleaning - put everything in bags and put them "over there," and thus, I have a clean room!
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kam
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Not able to read what others wrote. But, the power chair brings in dirt and pebbles/rocks.

Then I walk on them with my bare feet and get them on the couch and my bed when I lie down.

Guess I need one of those roomba vacuums. But, bending over to put it on the floor or turn it off and on is off too as well as being able vacuum most of the time.

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JeniferM
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I have a Roomba that I got for Christmas one year. It gets stuck in corners and on furniture and stuff. If you had just a big open space without any furniture in it, it might work okay, but I find myself having to rescue the darned thing and turn it to go the other way a lot. And, you have to bend over, pick it up, and hang it on the charger after each use.

--------------------
IgM: [18++,31+++,34++,41++,83-93+] [39 IND]
IgG: [41 IND]
Positive according to IGeneX. Negative according to CDC. Negative for co-infections.
Currently treating for Lyme, Bartonella, Babesia

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Fuel1212
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It makes me feel icky..

Not quite as bad as the crawlies under my skin, but close!

--------------------
IgM- 31,34,39,83-93 IND
IgM- 41+

IgG- 31,34,39,83-93 IND
IgG- 41++

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Dogsandcats
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i thought about getting one of the roomba's. but with the ADHD destruck-do dog, thought against it.

had workmen in here repairing the shower. they all used the toilet. I know everyone has to "go". but geez, i began to feel like it was a bus station toilet it got so dirty. made my husband do it.
amazingly he agreed. it must have been bad.

guess it beats a porty potty out on the front lawn.

--------------------
God will prepare everything for our perfect happiness in heaven, and if it takes my dog being there, I believe he'll be there.

Billy Graham

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