posted
First of all, i have been trying to cope with this as good as i could but here's the story.
I was on the wheldon protocol (zithro/doxy/tini) for over a year when i suddenly got extremely worse, overnight i had many new symptoms and my MCS got a LOT worse. My liver was all over the place, my detox stucked. I think it might have to do with candida... I'm not sure though.
Anyway - i tryed and tryed to get better in this time. I started to react to lower amounts of mold in buildings which made it impossible for me to live anywhere inside without suffering from symptoms and allergies.
The new apartments either had chemicals, mold or both. I often woke up with fatigue, runny nose/eyes and blurry vision, nerve pains and brain on fire symptoms.
At this time and still, i was living at my girlfriends flat where 4 people live. I was going there because my apartment before was shut down by water and weather damage and had mold too.
Long story short, the basement is moldy here and i get sick after a couple hours inside but CSM powder and sleep outside in the tent are good. although sleeping outside is sometimes not as good.
Other places are so bad i react within minutes. This city has a lot of moldy buildings. Getting apartments is very hard here (many students that take anything) and i can try and try and it is super stressfull for me and my body. This is nothing but a survival trip and it changed me.
The cold months in the winter were pure hell for me i was reactive to anything and had to sleep outside with all those lyme/whatever symptoms. Despite that i kept on searching over and over and had to move in and out of 5 or 6 apartments - all on my own.
Best thing is my ex girlfriend started to "blame" me for "being here and she can't believe i can't be anywhere else", as my parents house is moldy too and my other friends would get "fed" being around a person with lyme fore more than 2 weeks.
She did a great job at going to her parents because they obviously said "she did the right thing" and finally all her friends started to hate me for "still being here"
She normally really gets the disease and knows many papers but i think the whole thing with lyme was too much for her after 6 years. Many Doctor visits. It started to get akward...
People would judge me for so much bull**** i felt like i had moved 10 steps backwards. Suddenly it all got very weird where i felt like anyone is against me.
I think she lives in denial with it because she made a lot of new friends that DON'T get lyme and she was afraif of "losing" all those - i've seen it firsthand and it was one of her statements...
So at one point i had to broke up with her because she told me "she's not sure anymore and wants to be free blabla" - i have never been needy and i gave her a lot of freedom because i knew how much pressure this disease can put on a relation
but to be honest i found this totally unempathic, lame and i feel like i get abandoned from people because i'm sick as a dog and they don't get it or they get tired from it.
so after this horrendous breakup i was still stuck in the flat, still had to see her, still had to tolerate all her bull**** claims and she was in complete denial of how bad the situation for me was...
and even if i convinced her that im going through hell and i need all the support right now, she still went to her friends telling them "How bad it is for her that i still live there " - as if i had a choice.
I didn't see it coming as the relation was still good and even after the breakup there was still the same energy/presence between us and i didn't get why she was throwing it away. On the other hand i hated her actions so much that i did not make any move to get her back.
zero help from her. i was searching for a place to live nonstop and totally burned out from it. not more than 3 or 4 days after the breakup she had a new guy that she had seen in our circle of friends. i feel like she uses him to get over me as quick as possible and not to think about me.
then she said to the other people in this house that i'm blocking her from "staying" here and i haven't found a place that i can tolerate with my mcs/mold illness..... it's all beyond me. some people told me i'm manipulating them because i gave them a link for under our skin and mold illness.
it's beyond me, this girl supported me the whole time like a boss and then suddenly, almost overnight turned against me. i haven't talked about it with a lot of people but i seriously don't know what to do right now. hotels are too expensive and i'm beyond broke right now.
but the funniest part is that im maybe one of the calmer lymies that enjoy life whenever they can...i often just wanna cry and spit because i seriously don't know how i'm gonna survive this right now. haven't found a place yet. last place when i was testing it was super allergic...
I still don't know how i survived this long and the whole journey has been so dramatic and ****ed up i don't even know how to write it down properly. It's been 3 month
................................................
Breaking this up for easier reading for many here -
poppy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 5355
posted
Sorry, very rough. I don't know how any of us have kept going as long as we have. And without a lot of support. Sounds like she just ran out of empathy. I think many of our friends and family just don't want to deal with it, or get tired of it. You have a lot of company here with this problem.
Hope you will find a way to keep going, find a better situation or be able to stay where you are for a while longer until you do.
Posts: 2888 | From USA | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
Very sorry to hear, Indica. I hope you can find a new place all by yourself. Are you able to work?
MCS and candida go hand in hand... just a tip for you.
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96222 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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Judie
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 38323
posted
I got MCS from a toxic exposure, this was long before Lyme.
Yes, being abandoned by friends and your loved ones sucks with this illness. My fiance left me after I got MCS. He just couldn't believe chemicals could cause problems.
So sorry you're going through this. I hope you can find a safe place.
It took me 10 years to find a safe home. I had to move away from the city and being right on the coast. It made me too sick. Too much pollution and mold.
It's exhausting to house hunt when you're well, when you're sick it's doubly difficult.
My MCS got MUCH worse with Lyme (I also tested positive to 13 coinfections). One doctor told me that once the infections are taken care of, I'll be less reaction.
This has been proving true as time goes on.
Some antibiotics made my MCS way worse and once I switched, the MCS calmed down.
Here's a list of what else to test for if you haven't already:
GretaM
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 40917
posted
Since fighting lyme, I have lost my boyfrriend of 5 years and a parent.
Neither wanted to put in the effort to maintainn a relationship with a sick person.
They're gone and good riddance.
I hope your luck changes soon and you find a better place to live.
Posts: 4358 | From British Columbia, Canada | Registered: Jun 2013
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Razzle
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 30398
posted
Molybdenum supplements help with candida toxins and also with MCS. This mineral is inexpensive and yet so, so helpful...at least, it has been for me...
-------------------- -Razzle Lyme IgM IGeneX Pos. 18+++, 23-25+, 30++, 31+, 34++, 39 IND, 83-93 IND; IgG IGeneX Neg. 30+, 39 IND; Mayo/CDC Pos. IgM 23+, 39+; IgG Mayo/CDC Neg. band 41+; Bart. (clinical dx; Fry Labs neg. for all coinfections), sx >30 yrs. Posts: 4166 | From WA | Registered: Feb 2011
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