Hambone
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 29535
posted
My daughter's boyfriend plays baseball in high school. He also has type 1 diabetes.
This year they got a new baseball coach, and this coach would never play my daughter's bf in the games. He'd go to every practice but have to sit on the bench during games. If their team lost, he'd have to do laps with the team even though he didn't play. But he never complained.
Last night was senior night, where all the senior players walked on the field with their parents and were introduced. Then, all of the seniors got a chance to play in the game.
Except my daughter's bf.
Even some juniors and sophomores were played, but "J" had to sit on the bench the whole time.
This is his final year playing and this coach wouldn't let him play on senior night.
( Nothing at all disciplinary. It's more like discrimination because of his disease. )
He was so embarrassed and hurt because his family and friends came out especially for senior night to watch him play...fully expecting to see him play since all seniors get played on senior night.
This poor kid was dealt the blow of having diabetes, his father treats him like crap, and he already feels beaten down. Baseball is the one thing that he feels good at and makes life feel normal for him.
But this new coach apparently isn't keen on having a diabetic pitch for him.
I stewed all night about it and today I shot off an email to this coach telling him how he hurt this kid and how wrong it was to make him sit the bench on senior night while everyone else( even non seniors ) got to play.
As soon as I hit send, I started questioning if I should've just kept my mouth shut.
But then the other part of me thinks this arrogant jerk has no business working with kids ( I still think he's a kid even though he's 18 ). The opinion most people have is this guy won't play him because of him being diabetic.
What would you have done?
Would you have kept quiet and let it go?
Would you have said something?
I'm questioning myself now. Sometimes I don't feel like I have the best judgement because of this Lyme thing. I just hate how "J" was made to feel like he didn't matter, or that he's not as good as the others because of his disease. It broke my heart
Thanks
( I taught this boy in 3rd grade and feel like he's one of my own....hence the Mamabear in me. )
Posts: 1142 | From South | Registered: Dec 2010
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posted
I don't blame you one bit. I think this is terrible! Poor guy!! Maybe you overstepped .. but it might wake this coach up. If I were the parents, I'd sue him.
I hear you on the Mama Bear thing. My school kids were MY kids too!!
Let us know if you get a response!
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96222 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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lymeladyinNY
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 10235
posted
My niece is Type 1 diabetic. She, too, was forced to sit the bench for field hockey. The coach told my brother she was "too scared" to let my niece play. Total discrimination. If you're going to coach, be prepared. Obviously, the parents want these kids to play, and they must have gotten a doctor's okay.
I would have said something to the coach, too. You did the right thing. I didn't know about my niece's situation till the season was over.
-------------------- I want to be free Posts: 1170 | From Endicott, NY | Registered: Sep 2006
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Hambone
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 29535
posted
Thank you.
I really needed to vent about this. It kept me awake last night..I was so mad.
It felt good to let this coach know that I was sickened by what he did, but as soon as I hit send, I was like, "Oh crap, was I out of line?"
It wasn't a mean email at all. Just letting him know someone noticed what he did and thinks it was cruel.
I am sooooooo over people being mean...especially to kids.
But ooohhhhh, this coach's friend has a son on the team and he ALWAYS gets to play the whole game...every game...and he's just a freshman.
grrrrrr
Thanks for letting me vent about a non-Lyme issue Posts: 1142 | From South | Registered: Dec 2010
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posted
Unfortunately school sports can be very political.
Joe Blow's father might be the dad to one of the weaker players but best buds with the coach. So Joe Blow will play in every game.
Sometimes coaches just don't like kids for whatever reason and will sit them out.
HS sports are so extremely competitive these days. Coaches are less likely to send in those who are perceived as "weaker" unless of course there is a connection.
They'd rather see their team win at the expense of having all the kids participate. That works for professional sports, but at the HS and lower grades, it's so much more important to get as many kids as possible to participate in sports.
Sportsmanship and being a team-player are very good and important lessons. That's a parental point of view, not a coach's or school's.
Then we have the other end of the spectrum: every kid gets a trophy. Your kid shows up once or twice for whatever sport and still gets a trophy. Your kid's team loses and still gets a trophy. Your kid spells "the" and gets a trophy.
I really don't get it.
Hambone, I honestly don't know what I would have done in your situation.
I totally understand how your motherly instincts led you to send that email.
There is a part of me that asks what would our parents have done? I think the answer for most of us is nothing. It would have been up to us to handle these situations ourselves.
-------------------- You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'
---Eleanor Roosevelt Posts: 748 | From somewhere | Registered: May 2010
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dmc
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 5102
posted
you did great Hambone. No one can excuse any coach who pulls trhis crap.
I'd report to school officials & school board so no other child is mentally abused ever again.
Posts: 2675 | From ct, usa | Registered: Jan 2004
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Hambone
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 29535
posted
He had another game last night.
STILL didn't get to play.
I'll be soooo glad when baseball season is over and he graduates and gets the heck out of there.
Makes me wonder how many adults are discriminated against ( being diabetic )in the workplace when it's time for him to go job hunting.
Posts: 1142 | From South | Registered: Dec 2010
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posted
I think you were more polite than I would have been. I absolutely detest that kind of behavior in adults. Almost gotten into fights because of it but I say there is no excuse for discrimination. None. I applaud you.
Posts: 98 | From Maytown PA | Registered: Apr 2011
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-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96222 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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payne
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 26248
posted
stay the course here, i applaud you.. he is a senior... forget if he can play. he deserves his time.. I would drop thinking there is away to curve the coach.. Rather, speak to this young man and let him hear from you as a mature adult, let him know others see what is happening... If you are sturred to speak up to his coach, take it another step and guide this young man to see how he can become a coach and lead youths to a better being... encourage him to take this event and make good of it within his future.. I would love to hear that boy is a coach someday against the odds that his caoch has put on him...let a guideness consular help him too I too, was a senior and remember the cockroaches freshman son replaced me .. I quit the team started my own team of so called misfits and we played intermiral BB, so, with the leftovers we challanged the varsity squad at a lunch time game at the school and beat the pants off them... the coach actually called the game early as the score was 40 to 30.. support that young man and i wish more people would stand against the negitive leaders. wheu, hit a nerve..
-------------------- TULAREMIA/rabbit fever ? Posts: 1931 | From mid-michigan | Registered: Jun 2010
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posted
I absolutely think you did the right thing! This coach was out of line. My son plays baseball..and theres a boy that is an insulin dependent diabetic on the team. You see him checking his blood sugar sometimes. If this boys parents didnt think he could handle it, he wouldnt be playing.
I applaud you for speaking up! Too bad he didnt get a barrage of emails!
Posts: 624 | From Oklahoma | Registered: Jun 2010
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