Topic: Who pretends to be HEALTHY to keep their job
lymeHerx001
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 6215
posted
Yea, thats why I started this thread. We best "suck it up" and pretend rather then tell everybody the TRUTH.
Its like when people see you in public or at the work space, "Hi John, how are you?" and what do you respond with "well do you really want to know?"
NO~! We all say "good and you?"
Its like a question that is really just a greeting. People dont have the time or energy or capacity to really understand or appreciate how things are going in our lives.
How the world would be a different place if people actually spoke whats on their minds.
We are a country of LIARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And we lie and lie and lie to different people for different reasons and they are all justified lies depending on who you talk too.
We can never ever ever ever ever tell an employer that we are sick, especially if we are going for a new job.
WE LIE and tell them everything is copacetic.
Posts: 2905 | From New England | Registered: Sep 2004
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posted
Randibear, You WON a battle!! I know it doesn't seem like much compared to the Lyme war in your body but we need to feel good about any victory.
Sticking it out till retirement is a great accomplishment. Be proud of yourself.
I bet it took a lot of strength and energy just to go in every day. Who cares what former coworkers thought, if they were friends they'd have been supportive.
I haven't even been able to return to work yet. And now it's being postponed again.
Congratulations on your retirement, Gerifrog
Posts: 151 | From Kingston NY | Registered: Nov 2008
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posted
Yes, I have faked it to keep almost everything in my life!
I'm a big faker. Honestly.
Randi, I am like you, I used to cry to and from the office every day!
I work at home now, so if I am stuck staring at the monitor (JohnS), I can hide it. However, it takes me three times longer to do a task than it should. I end up making less than minimum wage by the time I figure out my hours.
I do find people are sympathetic when they find out, but I feel the need to push through as if everything is fine. Sympathy only lasts so long before people feel bitter and put upon. At least that is my experience, so I don't even bother seeking it out. Even from loved ones.
You are definitely not alone. Wishing you better days.
Posts: 636 | From Saratoga County, NY | Registered: Apr 2008
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posted
So what do I tell my employer when I get in the position that I need to take medical leave or work out reduced hours ? I don't want it to come back and bite me.
Posts: 526 | From NJ | Registered: May 2007
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posted
I am in the same boat, or was anyway. I was just fired from a job I had been at for over 11 years. I had FMLA and was fired anyway. I filed a complaint with the Federal Wage and Hour and the company I had worked for lied and it was "my word against theirs". At least that is what my investigator said. So why do they have anyone investigate then if they can just lie and get away with it. Now I am without an income and without health insurance. I am a single mother and I used to feel very blessed that I was still able to work. Now everything is a mess. I am now unable to afford my meds(not just Lyme meds). I am not sure what to do next. Cry some more I guess...... Take care all! I know it could be worse, but I have just had a rough last couple of months.
posted
orrn: Did you have a doctor document for you employeer that you really needed a medical leave?
I think that would really help for people in this situation, but on the other hand do you really want your doctor to detail to your employeer exactly what you are going through?
Posts: 526 | From NJ | Registered: May 2007
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posted
radfaraf: Yep...have had 3 different doctors write for my FMLA(Family Medical Leave Act). Didn't help.....!
I had intermitent leave, meaning that I needed days off when my(or my daughter's) symptoms acted up.
My former employer lied and said that on 5 of those days when I called in I did not say it was because of my LD or FMLA related.
I knew that I had to do that so I always made sure I did, except for one time when I had the flu, but that was it.
I asked the investigator if they had the messages I left or a log of some sort(I know they don't cause I used to take the messages on some days) and she said "no".
So it is my word against theirs and the investigator took their side I guess. So much for employee rights!
I am just absolutely floored by all of this. And now that my insurance has run out I am off meds and can't think or act straight alot of the time.
I have applied for other jobs, but I think they are giving me a bad reference. So what do I tell people I have done for the past 11 years?
Why would they keep me for 11 years if I was such a bad employee? I am just crushed.
I did not mean to get off track with the original poster....Sorry lymeHerx001!!!!
posted
After I got this disease I started to wonder everytime I saw a homeless person if that poor ******* maybe just got some viral or microbial disease!
It definitely makes you more compassionate.
Posts: 743 | From New York | Registered: Apr 2009
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posted
Yep, i definately fake it. The people at work know about the lyme but for the most part i try to put a smile on and just go about my daily work. I am having more and more trouble doing that though lately. I have been having seizures and had one at work yesterday so they pretty much know for sure now.
I always feel like i just want to be as normal as possible and i don;t think that people want to hear some one complain all of the time about how they are feeling so i just fake it.
I do think that it is just adding another stress to my life because i am sure that i am not going to be able to fake it much longer.
I have been thinking about ckecking into disability but i just hate to face that. Wish i could snap my fingers and just feel normal (what ever normal is).
Posts: 55 | From ohio | Registered: Aug 2008
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posted
I know what all of you go through metally and physically , and I'm sorry to have nothing but the same stories to share ! It's a test I never sighned up to take , and I'm failing it!
The frustration of knowing that people just don't get it , family , friends , coworkers , nobody but our good llmd's , and us , wears me down even more .
Fakin it till I know another way to survive ! Hang in there , and good luck to us all !!!!!
Posts: 97 | From West Chester ,Pa. | Registered: Aug 2006
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lymeHerx001
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 6215
posted
uhh!
The chemical sensitivity reared its ugly head again! I woke up at 5am in a sweat!
This time it was from the phthalates in the new office chair.
Gotta return that now. Great. This is hell, torture at best!!!!!!!
Posts: 2905 | From New England | Registered: Sep 2004
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lymeHerx001
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 6215
posted
Well its that time of year again for reveiews.
My review last year was good, but the one this year... not so good.
First they said I was negative! So I got a no in enthusiasm category.
Then they said that my work wasnt the neatest because I chopped of someones name on a piece of paper.
Then third they said that the they cant find me in the building sometimes because Im helping everyone out too much!!!
All this for $300 a week.
But they pay my insurance. Im killing myself for the stupid insurance.
I am so livid.
I wish I could just have a regular insurance so I can go from job to job and bypass these underpaying government greed mongers.
Posts: 2905 | From New England | Registered: Sep 2004
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lymeHerx001
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 6215
posted
anyone else?
Posts: 2905 | From New England | Registered: Sep 2004
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posted
I still work b/c of the $ we have to spend to fight this DD.
PPL at work know I have Lyme and pretend to understand but they really don't. I try not to let it show when I'm having a real difficult time.
I work for the state of NY, and they do not carry disability on us. (For any other business in the state, it's the law to carry disability on your employees).
So I made a plan, saving up my time (vac, sick, holiday, and personal leave), then I'll take a medical leave now and then. My LLMD says anytime, just give him the word. Three or four weeks of rest now and then, and still getting a paycheck will be great.
BTW too, sometimes I just use my age as an excuse.
Posts: 847 | From upstateNY | Registered: Dec 2007
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posted
I used to work but when I was at my worst, I took a medical leave that turned into my resignation for medical reasons. (lyme)
My co-workers were supportive and understanding but lyme is pretty well known here. (Just not treated appropriately 9 times out of 10!)
I was lucky in that my husband was able to hire me after a couple of years of healing. I was able to work from home, part time. Good because I could work around the brain fog and other issues.
I do not tell anyone how I feel at this point. I have tried to get my extended family to understand, but they seem to be in denial and would rather think that I just do not want to spend time with them.
My husband knows, because he sees me day to day. But even with him, I do not tell him everything. Lyme has taken the wife he knew away and I try to be as "normal" as possible for him. (which is pretty far from normal)
My kids don't really know the extent of it either. I just can not burden them with worry.
I have to go back to work because my husband's company has suffered terribly from this economy. I was just wondering if I should tell them when interviewed why I have not worked in my field for the past 8 years...or if I should just give them a story.
All the best to everyone here that are climbing that huge mountain. Just remember to stop and rest when you can.
-------------------- I found my original identity! It has been a bit over 12 years...can't blame me for forgetting my password, right?!!
Member red (Member # 1886) Registered: 26 November, 2001 70 posts Posts: 164 | From NJ | Registered: Jan 2009
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posted
I got put on disability for lyme then when my claim for short term disability got denied I was let go from my company. Now there is a lawsuit against my company for it.
I want to go back to work but I'm scared because I know I'm not there yet.
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