posted
My mom, who was 87 and suffering from congestive heart failure had a hip fracture and fell a week ago. She made it through the surgery, but went into renal failure.
There are 10 of us "kids", 18 grandkids and 20 great-grandkids.
Unlike Randibear's family, we all get along and nobody is fighting over anything. In fact, we're having a hard time convincing some of the next generation to take something to remember her by.
One of my sisters-in-law was so touched when we told her that she was getting the "memory quilt" that we had done for my mom's 80th birthday. She was instrumental in putting it together.
So far, we're all coping well, but the time will come when everyone goes back to their respective homes that it will really hit hard. I visited with my mom once or twice every week and am in charge of her financial dealings. My youngest brother and I are co-executors of her estate and we have no clue what we have to do! First step, call her attorney.
Please keep me in your thoughts and wish me luck. I had to cancel my LLMD appointment last week, but only postponed until the 20th, so I should be OK.
-------------------- "Few of us can do great things, but all of us can do small things with great love". Mother Theresa
tdtid
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 10276
posted
Hurtinggramma,
I am so very sorry to hear of your loss.
It's true what they say....the death of love one either brings out the best or worst in people.
No one knows how it will effect even those closest to you until it happens.
I'm glad you are all there for each other. Still doesn't ease the pain of the loss, but please know we are here for you.
Cathy
-------------------- "To Dream The Impossible Dream" Man of La Mancha Posts: 2638 | From New Hampshire | Registered: Oct 2006
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bejoy
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 11129
posted
I am sorry to hear about your loss. Even when someone is older, and it may be their time to go, when you love them you still miss them a whole lot. Thinking of you. I hope you can still feel her close by.
-------------------- bejoy!
"Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Posts: 1918 | From Alive and Well! | Registered: Feb 2007
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treepatrol
Honored Contributor (10K+ posts)
Member # 4117
posted
Sorry
-------------------- Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Remember Iam not a Doctor Just someone struggling like you with Tick Borne Diseases.
posted
I'm so sorry to hear this, hg!! I know she will be missed greatly by your family. My mother died of congestive heart failure and kidney failure too. [and lyme]
I know you will be able to handle the paperwork....just one step at a time.
HUGS to you and your family!
-------------------- --Lymetutu-- Opinions, not medical advice! Posts: 96239 | From Texas | Registered: Feb 2001
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AZURE WISH
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 804
boy did your mom have her hands full....and lived till 87...sounds like a very strong person...
Hg... I'm so sorry for your loss.
mtree
-------------------- worrying about tomorrow takes its strength away from today Posts: 970 | From Point PLeasant , NJ | Registered: Jan 2008
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joalo
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 12752
posted
I'm so sorry about your mom. I know how hard it is to lose a parent...
-------------------- Sick since January 1985. Misdiagnosed for 20 years. Tested CDC positive October 2005. Treating since April 2006. Posts: 3228 | From Somewhere west of the Mississippi | Registered: Aug 2007
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posted
So sorry to hear about your Mother's passing My Dad has congestive heart failure also. Sending prayers to you and your family.
Cyber hugs,
Gail
-------------------- Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will ~ Gandhi Posts: 562 | From Wellsville, PA, USA | Registered: Jan 2004
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lymeinhell
Frequent Contributor (1K+ posts)
Member # 4622
posted
I am so sorry for your loss.
Just know that people care that you are hurting.
Here's some things that helped get me through many losses:
BUSY.... Busy always helps. Things that involve lots of little work with your hands. Stencil something. Plant some bulbs (planted over 1000 when I lost my Mom). Hang border. Then rip it down (when I lost my Dad, lots of rooms got redone) ... Detail the inside of my car.
And then there's always shopping... or window shopping..
Know that it's ok to feel however you feel. Hurt, angry, melancholy, or even if you just need to stick your head in the sand for a while. You're entitled to feel that way. We all heal differently.
Remember her. Talk about her. Tell stories about her. And she will never leave you.
-------------------- Julie _ _ ___ _ _ lymeinhell
Blessed are those who expect nothing, for they shall not be disappointed. Posts: 2258 | From a better place than I was 11 yrs ago | Registered: Sep 2003
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-------------------- Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love Posts: 61 | From Atlanta, GA | Registered: Nov 2008
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posted
Sorry to hear of your loss. It sounds like your mom has left quite a legacy and raised a wonderful family.
Peace be with you and your family while you all go through this transition in life.
proudmom
-------------------- "Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence"--Carl Sagan Posts: 317 | From Kansas and New Jersey | Registered: May 2008
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posted
Hurtingramma I'm sorry to about you mother passing on. My husband's mom died just 2 months after my dad died in a very similar way your's did. How very wonderful she lived to see grandchildren and greatgrand children! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. -Peedie
Posts: 641 | From So. CA | Registered: May 2008
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bettyg
Unregistered
posted
grandma,
sending you my heartfelt sympathies to you/extended family on the loss of your beloved mom!
so glad things are going well on dividing up things and NO FRICTION.
may you receive some comfort from my below poems; MOM POEMS ARE AT END OF COLLECTION!!
The funeral is today, then the hard part begins after everyone goes home.
Bettyg - thank you for the poems. We actually used the "God's Garden" on the back of the card that were handed out.
My brother, the co-executor does live nearby and we have a good attorney to guide us through the process. We got papers out of her safe-deposit box yesterday. Mostly her will and he insurance papers. She was well prepared.
Her funeral had been all pre-arranged, including all the music and readings for the service, who she wanted to sing what (we're a musical family) and she had put all her assets with one agent and listed the estate as beneficiary.
She has been preparing for this day beginning 4 years ago when she had a quadruple bypass.
I may make it through the song I'm singing in a quartet, but I know I will break down when my brother sings "How Great Thou Art". He sang the same song at my son's funeral in 1982.
-------------------- "Few of us can do great things, but all of us can do small things with great love". Mother Theresa
I'd love to spend time with my Mom, but have a roadblock to get to her. She's 84 with terminal cancer.
All of her properties will go to the other children. I asked her to leave me out of her will many years ago, because I knew there would be problems w/middle sister.
So Very Glad your family has the kind of communications, integrity and values that family should be made of.
In your Mother's passing - your family story touches my heart-strings.
Mom - Be with the Angles. Grace
Posts: 212 | From Arizona | Registered: Jul 2008
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